Advice to the Lovelorn…You’re kidding, right?

Written in very cursive script denoting the maturity and education of the author 

 

August 4th

Dear Journal,

I’m still sitting here in Dalaran this morning, kind of chuckling to myself at the situation.  The reason you ask?  Well, me giving advice to someone about their love life has got to be the biggest joke on Azeroth.  I have had some great relationships that have lasted for a while and have all gone to Hell in a matter of months with the exception of my lovely wife.  I guess she can tolerate my craziness better than the rest could. At least I think she’s tolerating it, she hasn’t aimed a bow at me in a while.

Of course, with Dawnglory being in Silvermoon this past week has really put a lot of travel time under my belt but it’s kind of fun in some ways because I can see the other side of things for a while.  I think sometime that I forget what it was like to be down in the trenches, meaning, and running through Orgrimmar, the flies, the dust and the noise of a city still being under construction.  I’ll admit that I live a sheltered life when I’m in Dalaran because it is isolated, which is what I like about it.  Anyway, I did have a few contracts to collect on in Silvermoon as well as a bounty that was being hard-pressed because the fellow had not only deserted; he had stolen a few things from his last posting. Not a good plan – apparently, he’s living very openly in Silvermoon, what a dolt.

I could stop by the house to see how everyone is doing there as well as at the healers to see how the animated thing was doing and to pay up some of the bills for her being confined there and requiring round the clock attention.   I hope someone can figure out something soon because it is an expense that could run on indefinitely.  Why it didn’t just disintegrate and go away at the end seems that no one can tell me that.  They even tried the holy water sprinkling that Felestrien suggested with no results, no smoke, no eye opening – nothing. 

Anyway, I did my tag and bag pretty neatly, took me under an hour and a short chase out the gates.  A neatly placed arrow and it was over.  Stupid ass thought he could outrun Pan, which almost made me fall because I was laughing while I was giving pursuit too.  I needed a quick pick me up so I thought I’d stop by this little bar that I frequent occasionally, they won’t mind if I bring the bag in with me.  With the way things are in this city, I’d leave the bag outside and some Forsaken might think it’s a free lunch or something and there would go the money – no body, no cash. I knew that when I stopped off at the house that I could leave the bag in the stables for a few hours without it “spoiling” from any heat, they do get rank if you don’t get them emptied soon.

I walked in; the place was kind of empty and looked around to see if there happened to be anyone in there interesting.  Well, I do pick up a few bounties by recognizing a perpetrator in these places which makes my life a lot easier.  People are so stupid when they are on the run, they think that they can just fit back into the mainstream and there are no consequences.

I thought I recognized this golden-haired fellow sitting in the corner; he was definitely working on getting into his cups. It was the young Ranger from Dalaran that I had met a few times.  The first time I met him was at Raleth’s bachelor party and I couldn’t help but notice how he was ogling the Kaldorei dancer as much as I was at the time.  The look on his face when the other guy took her home with him was priceless, I’ll admit that.  You could tell that he had wanted to do the same thing but hadn’t been fast enough to beat out the other guy.

He didn’t seem to mind that I sat down with him either, which was kind of nice, I suppose.   I was just curious as to why he was in Silvermoon when his wedding date wasn’t that far off.  Maybe one last fling or something, you never know with these Sindorei, or he could have a mistress stashed here too.  Well, seems like I put my foot in it when I asked him how he was doing and how things were progressing for his wedding.  Seems he and his girl have split up.  I know I felt terrible and wished to hell that I had remembered that Amyn had told me about it before now. 

We talked and drank for quite a while, discussing, you guessed it, women.  Seems his girl was unfaithful to him, not once but a couple of times, which caused this last rift in the relationship.  I can really understand how he feels though.  It isn’t everyone that has had a wife run off with an Orc either.  It really puts a damper on the old ego and it really kind of pisses you off a bit. 

We did the usual male commiserating of how women are all the devil and so forth.  You know the thing where they would probably climb a tree backwards before they would tell you the truth.  Apparently she had a fling with the young crippled Ranger while she was still with this guy and then, to top it off, she has an apprentice that this fellow is sure will eventually fall into her bed.    I have met the girl and she didn’t strike me as the sort that would play around when she was with someone, however, you never know how some women are.  Maybe she had a bigger appetite for things than this poor fellow could satiate.  Hell, I worry about that with Amyn sometimes, that woman can wear me out real fast when she gets into her more amorous moods, however, Kaldorei women are like that, which is a huge plus.  Well, my Kaldorei is like that, can’t say that I have slept with that many of them. Anyway, it sounds like this girl was a bit of a tart, who knew? 

Me being me, I gave him the suggestion that he ought to find a nice Kaldorei girl; they were totally different than the Sindorei women.   When a Kaldorei takes you as a mate, they are loyal, no matter if you’re a real horse’s behind like I was with Amyn all those years.  She only took another mate when I was married and the poor fellow died in a hunting accident.  I don’t think that she has been with many men anyway.  This girl friend of this Ranger sounds like she might have started a side business in a brothel or something.  Seems she’s a bit road traveled. I’ll have to remind myself to be careful around her and not ever get myself into an embarrassing position with her; I don’t need that sort of trouble in my marriage.

I did laugh when he told me that Kaldorei women were crazy.  No, fellow, all women can be crazy if you hit them at just the right time, it’s not determined by race.  I know that when those moon phases hit at the same time that they are upset about something else, it’s just as well for all males to head off to parts unknown until it passes.  I haven’t met a woman yet that was totally sane all of the time like guys are.  With a guy, you know where you stand, with a woman, you’re always guessing.  Even though female Death Knights don’t have moon phases, they can get a bit crazier than normal at times; I know that through my sister and past associations.  I told him that we’d try to find him a nice Kaldorei girl one of these days and he mentioned the dancer from the party.  All I can say is that once you go Kaldorei, you never are satisfied with anything else.  What I did wrong was straying off and trying to find something that wasn’t there to start with. 

Anyway, he was doing some work with the Rangers; it seems he was just kind of wandering around a bit.  I know how well they pay, which isn’t enough to buy your next meal sometimes and the barracks life can be a bit of a pain because it’s like living in a glass house with signs pointing at you like a display. 

I did what I normally do when I find a Ranger wandering around and in need of work.  I offered him a job.  The man should never play poker because I could tell that he didn’t like the percentages that the company takes out of the contracts.  Hey, it’s a business and there is a certain amount of overhead that needs to be paid out, not to mention, the profit that has to be made or you might as well just stay in the Rangers.  Since he was wanting to stay away from things as much as possible, cities, family and all that, I thought that Outland might interest him a bit, so, I played that up a bit.  I gave him one of business cards and told him to think about it.  If he comes to work for Morningstar Enterprises, I don’t think he will be unhappy, however, if he chooses not to, that’s his business.

I did stop by the house for a little while to check on things.  I guess that Dawnglory will be bringing his sister back to Dalaran sometime today, now.  He and I are still trying to get past our altercation and it’s going to be a tough time for a while. He had said some things that needed to be said and I had reciprocated in like kind.  Sometimes too much truth can cause more damage than just avoiding it altogether.  He seemed genuinely happy to see me this time and his sister looks a whole lot better than the last time that I had seen her.  As for Faendra, she was very happy to see me and told me that she thought she might be coming back to Dalaran in a few days; she wasn’t too keen on staying in the house alone right now.

I suppose that was a bit understandable considering all of the things that have transpired around there in the last few months.  I know that it was tough on everyone involved and it will probably haunt our memories for quite a few years to come.

Damn, I got another of those boxes in the mail.  This time, it’s a bit more close to home than what I had wanted to see.  It was a long blonde braid that has some blood on it, a smashed Morningstar Enterprises comlink, sigil and a signet ring that looks real familiar.  I’ve already tracked down the comlink because of the serial code was still partially visible, at least. 

Seems it belongs to Sollonne and the braid definitely must be hers.   I wonder what in the hell she’s gotten herself into at this point?   I never know where that woman is, she’s like a shadow that suddenly solidifies in front of you, and I didn’t even know she was in Dalaran at this point.  I do know that she isn’t ever too far away from me or the company, it seems like.  Some kind of real scary badass guardian angel that just appears out of nowhere right in front of you.  Well, it looks like she has gotten herself into some trouble this time.   If she was in Dalaran, she might have left some trace of herself and someone must have seen her somewhere.  I’ll have to start checking around.

Just when I thought that things were going to settle down and level out some, here we go again – the crazy dance of life as we know it on Azeroth has called in a new tune. 

 

 

Fnor Morningstar

4 thoughts on “Advice to the Lovelorn…You’re kidding, right?

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