Why Now…In This Time and Place..Why Now?

September 30th

 

Dear Journal,

I am sitting here in Dalaran, alone again, with a very heavy heart.  All of my Sindorie’s feelings of what might come to pass have happened.  He kept apologizing to me for the things that the Horde has done.   I could see the pain, anguish and sorrow in his eyes each time he looked at me.   I kept telling him that I knew that it wasn’t his fault, that I knew that he took no glory for the damages that have befallen the Alliance, still, that sorrow was still there as I bid him farewell.

Yes, he was recalled to fight.  His age didn’t matter, his family didn’t matter, and however, his affiliation to his countrymen was something that he had to uphold.  His honor forced him back into a battle that he doesn’t believe in.  I could see it in his face that his heart was breaking, that he didn’t want to go.

It was hard enough to see my husband go off to battle for something that he didn’t believe in, however, it almost killed me to see my eldest child following in his Father’s footsteps.  Kal didn’t want to go, however, like his Father, he felt honor bound.  He’s young, he’s never seen the horrors of war, and he has no idea of what it is like to see his friends killed one by one.  I never wanted this for my children to go through as their parents have already seen it.  When he comes back, if he comes back, he will be changed – he will be a grown man, a bit more cynical when his innocence has been hacked away by some horrid green monster.    There is no joy in war, my son; there is only bloodshed, death and tears.

This new country, why do they have to go to foreign soil when there is so much strife in our own lands?  I can see the Horde going for the resources, the greedy bastards that they are.  I can see them destroy a country that appears to be filled with these new furry races that are a peace loving race, however, they will fight to uphold their beliefs, just as we will. 

My parents have moved to Dalaran to be safe.  They have both decided that they are too old to go into a battle again.  They are both world weary and only wish to live out their last remaining days in a place where they can have the illusion of harmony.  My Mother has started making her life here already, getting her pots out, and changing a few things in the guest house for her and my Father.

Vashlan has moved back to Dalaran to train, which is one more person that I won’t have to worry about. I thank Elune daily that he has his mind and his nose pressed into a book at every opportunity.  Maybe this is his way of denying what horrors may be going on in the world.   

I’m sitting here in the sitting room, tears slowly streaming down my face.  I didn’t even tell my Sindorei that I might be with child…another child to add to our damnation of daring to be in love even though our races are at war.

Yes, even if I am pregnant and I get called back to active duty, I will go, I don’t believe in this war other than the fact that the idiot leading the Horde at this point needs to die.  The poor people in Theramore didn’t stand a chance against the weapon that was used against them.  Yes, civilians were given the option to leave, however, how many died because they chose to stay behind with their loved ones.  I know that a woman will stand with her man to the bitter end; I’ve seen it many times in the past.  How many more orphans have they added to so many other homeless waifs? 

We had our brief time of a somewhat awkward peace in some parts of Azeroth.  Now, it has all been swept away by one foolish act. 

I just want my husband and my son to come home in one piece, that’s what I pray to Elune all of the time.  Yes, I understand that we’re traitors because we dared to love one another, however, my son never asked for this.  Oh, I beg of you, Elune…keep them safe.

Amyn

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Whew!!

Sorry to say that I haven’t been playing a whole lot in the last few days due to RL issues – health and an old pet of mine is on her last legs. Poor puppy is 14 years old, blind, almost deaf and has arthritis sometimes it’s hard to just to get her outside to do her thing.   RL has more bearing on what I do with my time.  I’m an older player, so I do have to make sure that my health isn’t adversly affected by long stretches of time spent on the computer.  I’ll try to get back into blogging and RPing again when things settle down because I do miss that aspect of the game tremendously.

So, I play when I can and do what I can in WoW.  I have my Alliance main almost to 86 and having a tough time keeping up with the rest of the guild that he belongs in – I’ll keep trying but if the guild feels that I’m not doing my part and they kick me out, I’ll be sad but I understand.

On another note:  I love the new expansion to pieces.  It’s awesome and it’s a game that I could very easily get lost in.  I love to quest, don’t really care all that much for dungeons although I realize I have to do them in order to have the gear to raid.  Blizzard has done a fantastic job with the expansion and it is well worth the money that I spent to get it.  The music, the lore and just the whole dynamic is  a product that has blown everything out of water.

Sure, I’m not overly fond of some of the other things in the game that Blizzard has recently done which I won’t even go into other than to say that it leaves me feeling a bit disoriented every now and again – when I start getting stressed out with the game, it’s just plain silly to stay logged in.

LOL, don’t know why I’m even publicly posting this but just in case some people were wondering about what was going on. Love you all, miss the hours I used to spend in-game but if my body tells me it’s time to take a break and that break is a day or two, I have to do that.  You can’t play at all if you’re dead – seems reasonable to me.

Winds of War

((Since only a few of my characters have been exposed to the actual scenerio that is/was Theramore and the Lore is a bit dicey at this point, having not read the “book” in addition to playing the game – there will be errors.  This is just how my character feels about the impact of the scenerio – no knowing all of the information, if any that was provided via Warcraft.))

Written in very cursive script denoting the maturity and education of the author 

September 24

Dear Journal,

Yes, everything that I have been feeling for all these many days has borne fruition and I’m more than a little bit distraught.  I’m sitting here at my desk and feeling as if I have aged a thousand times overnight because I had felt that something was going to happen, something horrific.  I thought that when Deathwing struck his blows against the world, that that was the worst thing that could have happened.

No, this has been even worse than anything that has ever happened.   We had all gotten comfortable with our lives and we all felt that we had made progress in healing some of the rifts between the factions, however, that rift has now become a chasm of such proportions that I have no idea how we can even attempt to heal it from a diplomatic standpoint.  I doubt that we can, there is nothing left that we can use for any kind of leverage to heal the damage done.

I know that Amyn is in the same boat with me.  We have our children to think of and our lives to be concerned with.  It’s like hearing a shoe drop somewhere and you know that another has to follow..but, follow it to where.   Will we even be safe in Dalaran?  I honestly don’t know but I will definitely kill anyone that tries to harm my family – this goes beyond faction, it is more a matter of the soul and he heart.

This whole thing could have been preventable if things had been left in more capable and sane hands other than that fool that now sits in Orgrimmar, gloating and feeling self-righteous.  If only Thrall could have foreseen the destiny in those “dreams” of his, healing the planet.  He forgot one thing, the people that live on the planet should have been swept aside and started anew – that would have healed the planet.

War!! Yes, war has once again reared its ugly head in the world and I am filled with trepidation and dismay.  It’s on a scale that I have never encountered before and the bloodbaths that I have heard of won’t be stopping anytime in the near future.  Yes, I have people that I care about that are involved in this thing through no fault of their own.  One person made a decision that will tear everything asunder if we aren’t prepared.  Are you Prepared?  I know I’m not, not by a long shot.

Yes, I am a member of the Horde just by happenstance; my allegiance is with my people to a certain level.  However, my priority is with my family.  Yes, I know my sons are an abomination in the eyes of some, both Horde and Alliance – however, Elune, the Light and the Earth Mother allowed us to bring them into this world – what does mankind have to say with that.  I used to take great pride in my faction affiliation until I saw how they could be bought and manipulated with a pack of lies and being lead by a true madman.   Now I feel anguish and shame.  I will do my duty; however, it will be with a sad heart.  I know that Amyn feels the same way; her people have given a great sacrifice for just being in the wrong place at the wrong time.

This war is going to bring so much death and destruction to our planet. Than we have ever seen before.  It will make Deathwing and Arthus look like a child’s fairytale.

I’ll maintain what normalcy I can here in Dalaran for as long as I can.  We’ll survive this as we have all of the others; however, I hope that the cost isn’t too dear.  I know that Kaldor has already seen the devastation wrought, his Mother has not but she knows from the things that she’s overheard. 

If Amyn and I both get called back into military duties, it will be with more than a heavy heart.   Yes, we’ve faced one another across the battlefields in the past – the Sentinel and the Ranger and we’ve both survived with the blessing of the higher powers. 

Yes, war is here and I know that it will outlive my generation and possibly Amyn’s too.  Who knows what these next few days and months will bring.

Dawnglory was in Shattrath when all of this came to pass, on business, as per usual.  Our communication links went into a tailspin and were not working properly – even sporadically they would function as they should.  He’s made his way back to Orgrimmar and will be back in Dalaran to report what he has seen.  Of the destruction that has occurred, he’s been very graphic in his description of the survivors and it breaks my heart.  One wonders how a sane man could have loosened a weapon of such magnitude on helpless civilians as well as the military in Theramore.   Yes, it reminds me of the last war and the war before that one in so many repects.  All of people being pulled into an abyss by some idiot that thought he had some idealist thoughts on how to preserve what they thought were important.  I know that the Alliance it going to retaliate, where and how they will do this is still a mystery.

I know that when Amyn and I retired for the night last night, we were both weeping.  All we could do was to hold one another in our arms and try to tell the other one that everything will be okay, when, neither of us actually knows what the outcome will be. 

Yes, I will be heading back to Orgrimmar and Dawnglory and I will be going out to check on the status of our employees to make sure that we haven’t lost any to this holocaust.  The people I have that report directly to me in Northrend are all devastated by the news we’re hearing and all are concerned about their families.   So, it’s back to going around 24/7 in our armor because we will be hard pressed to tell friend from foe at this point. 

Business, we’re being inundated to the point to where I don’t know that we can serve everyone.

Amyn and Kal will go to Stormwind to see what we have left in that area and tread very softly around some of the people that we knew.  As I said before, it’s hard to tell friend from foe these days. 

My heart and my soul weeps for the travesty that has been befallen all of us.

Fnor Morningstar

Something Unpleasant This Way Comes

September 10

Book,

I will have to admit that I haven’t’ written in several days, however, it’s been busy and my mood has been somewhere dark and dank.  Who knows, maybe I slept walked and had my head up Garrosh’s ass?

I am beginning to think that Fnor was right with his fears because I am seeing more and more roving bands of people out and about than what I am used too.  Doesn’t matter where you go or what you’re doing, there are people out there and not all of them are in the least bit friendly.  They would just as soon kill you and take whatever you happen to possess than to talk to you.  Interesting. It does remind me of the war in more ways than I would like to think about.

Roving bands of mercenaries pillaging the land and scampering back to whence they came.  Some of the employees are starting to voice concerns about the situation and I have taken the authority and started paying them hazardous duty pay on top of what they were already making.  I know that isn’t going to make Fnor fucking happy, however, at least I am keeping the income coming in even if it is lessened by a few percent.  Our next quarterly report is not going to be showing a hefty increase like it has for the last two years, however, it will show that we’re still producing the products that we have been contracted for. 

I don’t mind running into people on my travels and I don’t mind trying to interact with them, however, I may as well be running around with two heads and a target on my back.  No, no, they won’t try to assault you unless they have a group with them.  If this is an example of how Garrosh’s new troops are going to be, I think I will serve my time as I am instructed if I’m recalled and then I will calmly take off for parts unknown and let that “tick” on the throne handle his own civil war.  I swore allegiance to the Horde a long time ago but I never swore that I would become some one of less honor than a cockroach.  I suppose that is considered treason by some people, however, I would much rather becomes a traitor to this trash than to be a dead hero trying to uphold murder and mayhem.

I did go do Shattrath and I met with the Ranger there.  He is still turning in his pelts in a timely manner and seems to be adjusting to being in Outland.  At least we were able to have a civil conversation this time without his “feelings’ getting hurt or be offended by anything that someone else did that bumped into his sensitivities.  Maybe he is adjusting to his new life without that skirt holding his hand every step of the way.  Who knows?   Some day we might become friends once he gets all of his emotional baggage put behind him.

I did talk with the mage while I was down there as well and I hope that she gets the paperwork signed and back to me in the very near future before I end up getting involved in some other company business.   Yeah, I don’t mind traveling with her to Shadowmoon for her research or whatever it is that she is really doing, however, she is attractive and not my type at all.  She doesn’t appear to be all that condescending and I hope that she realizes that I won’t dance to the tune of being some kind of lackey for her.

The bounty business has definitely picked up and I am making more money than ever with that part of the business, however, that probably has to do with the fact that the idiots are coming “home” instead of just scampering out into the wild.  Guess they don’t like fighting the marauders anymore than I do.  Bagged three at the Faire this time and didn’t even cause anyone to blink an eye or even to appear to take notice of what was happening.

As for anything else going on, business is brisk here in Kalimdor and I have even had to make a couple of trips to the Eastern Kingdoms to check on the employees there.   Everything seems to be pretty much the same there too.  More roving mercenaries that only seem to want to wreck havoc in their path and not doing much else. 

I’ll have to admit that I am uneasy the whole time that I am out in the field anymore because these bands seem to crop when least expected.  Well, if that dick on the throne ever gets them organized, my heart goes out to the Alliance because the groups combined would be formidable. 

I’ve already given Fnor all of the reports that I have been able to glean from the people here in Orgrimmar and it does look like some kind of war is imminent.  When it is going to start is just a matter of time, I suppose.  I’m not looking forward to it.  I’ll do my fucking duty but I won’t like it. 

Gone are those days of being able to relax and enjoy doing my job.  I used to enjoy taking a few of the lesser contracts and going out in the field for a few days, now, I just add that much more ammo and that much more in the way of extra gear to my kit so that I will be able to survive.  I find myself getting into the mindset of wanting to kill people when I see them rather than trying to befriend them like I have always done before. 

I have found several areas that are completely barren of wildlife.  Don’t these people realize that they are upsetting the balance of nature?  They probably don’t care.  May the Earth Mother have mercy on our souls?  You’re only supposed to take what you need, not slaughter everything in the area to allow the beasts to replenish the area.    I can see that if this isn’t stopped or controlled somehow, there will be many starving people on Azeroth.   I just hope that the families that I have befriended and the employees that we have at this time will be able to ride this out. 

I’m actually worried about Fnor’s family.  For his involvement with his Kaldorei wife, I’m sure that there is a contract out there with his name on it somewhere and I already know that he is aware of it.  May the Light keep him and his family safe from the insanity that I know is going to befall this land.

I did get to spend some time with Faendra when I was in Dalaran and I would say that our relationship is progressing along at a slow pace but it is progressing.  No, I haven’t been out chasing skirts either, which is another thing that she let me know she wouldn’t abide with.  I can do this!! I did it for that priestess that dumped my ass and went off to who knows where, I can do it for Faendra.   At least I know that if Faendra dislikes something, she won’t just disappear, she has enough of brother in her that she will tell me straight up that she’s not happy about it. 

Oh well, I had better get off my ass and get back to work.  More contracts to hand out to the employees and more areas to check out to see what kind of devastation is there.   I hate what this land is becoming more and more each day. 

 

Fnar

 

Almost Time For Goodbye

I know I haven’t been posting a whole lot of late and my RP had dropped to almost total zero. I’m actually sersiouly considering quitting WoW when my subscriptions are up for renewal  I love the game with a passion, however, the new patch has shown me a side of the game that I would rather not see or have it forced upon me without my permission.  I love the changes and had such high hopes for the new cross server mergers, however, those rosey ideals have been trashed rather rapidly.

Character immersion has been shot to hell and gone with phasing in and out of zones, ending up on a PVP server when you have no warning is no fun.  I find myself becoming increasingly angry when I log in and at my age, that’s not a good thing.  I honestly don’t mind change and normally will roll with the punches, however, this last thing just tilted the cart too far, I think.  I’m finding the game to no longer be something that I can sit back and enjoy.

I will continue to fulfill my obligations to the guilds that I currently belong too, however, I probably won’t be saying a whole lot at this point.  I’m from the old school of, if you can’t say something “good”, then, don’t say anything at all.

Staying Neutral …Whether People Like It or Not

Written in very cursive script denoting the maturity and education of the author 

 

September 6th

Dear Journal,

After sitting here and banging my head on the desk for the last few days in regard to the fact that I think that that idiot Garrosh is going to do something stupid that will affect Azeroth adversely.  I have come to the conclusion that there is no way that I can stop it, however, there are other means to get around when situations change dramatically, which I’m sure that whatever this is, is going to be extremely dramatic. 

I am an Ambassador for the Horde, I’ve worked on negotiations for years between parties that have chosen to disagree and have been fairly successful with my endeavors over the years.  I have averted a few things that could have brought on a small civil war between some of the groups and have walked away knowing that I was successful or at least knowing that I have done my best to remain neutral with them.  It took me a long time to get the title and for it to be recognized, which it is recognized in most cases, and I’m considered more than a meddling businessman when it comes to this work.

I’m happy to say that Kaldor is also an Ambassador for the Alliance.  He’s good at what he does and in time I think that he will develop into quite a good Ambassador, it just takes time and experience.  Fortunately or Unfortunately, he did inherit my gift for talking at least.  He’s like a diamond in the rough right now but I can see that his mind is definitely working when he is dealing with issues that require a mediator. 

Maybe between the two of us we can still keep things at a level of neutrality and avoid some of the conflicts that I am sure are going to be dumped into our laps in the near future.  I’m sure that some of the more hardcore military minded folks will think that we are both traitors to our factions, however, that will be their prerogative and we will have to deal with that on a case by case basis. 

At least Amyn has done her part in getting the boys back to Dalaran for the time being, although, Kaldor still makes the trek back to Stormwind to make sure that everything is going okay with the company at least.  He hasn’t mentioned his young lady very much since he’s been home, however, that’s something I won’t pry into because it’s none of my business as his Father. 

I know that he and I have never sat at opposite ends of a negotiation table yet, however, I think that this is going to happen very soon.  I know that he has a level head on his shoulders, thanks to his Mother keeping his head out of his backside most of his life.  She’s a remarkable woman and I have all of the respect in the world for her with the way that she does her own brand of being a negotiator, however, that Sentinel will take over every now and again which means the negotiations end rather abruptly.

Well, now that I know the children are safe and my wife is at home, I can relax a little bit more.  It is going to be a bit hard on the older boys, however, they can go about their business as long as they let us know where they are for a while.  I’m still uneasy and worried and I think I will be that way for a while. 

I guess this is all about how it is when you’re parenting and running businesses.  Something is constantly preying on your mind.

 

Fnor Morningstar