Just A Little Bit Longer

 

Written in very cursive script denoting the maturity and education of the author.

 

 

 

November 20th

 

Dear Journal,

 

Well, I’m sitting here in Dalaran enjoying my cup of coffee and a cigarette or two because I can.  I was supposed to head back to Panderia yesterday morning; however, I am taking another week of leave so that I can spend some extra time with the family on the holiday.  I didn’t realize that when I took my leave that the feasting would be the next week. Oh well, my mistake.  It was easily rectified with a quick note to the powers-to-be and I’m here for another week.

 

I know that I was delaying my departure from Dalaran as long as I possibly could because I miss being with my wife and children.  I actually did leave and got as far as Orgrimmar before I just said the heck with it, I can take a few more days to spend with the family and I’m sure that my commanders will understand that too, if they haven’t all left and gone home to their families as well.

 

I know that Sunday night, laying there with a sobbing Amyn in my arms, I was sorely tempted to just not go back but I know my duty and my honor wouldn’t allow me to do that.  To see this beautiful and strong Sentinel  sobbing against my shoulder as she clung to me in the bed was even more gut wrenching this time that it was when I first went to Panderia.   Funny how things have changed since Amyn came to Dalaran and we were married.  To be honest, once I got it through my thick head that this is how my life should be and I should stop yearning for other things, I’ve been happier.  My wife, my children and friends – those are the important things.  Of course, the business will always enable me to maintain my family in the lifestyle that they have grown accustomed too.

 

I know that being in Panderia has been a real mind altering experience for me.  Sure, its war, like any war can be, however, this one feels different.  The Panderian people are a people that remind me more and more of the Tauren in Kalimdor – the feelings that they express in their beliefs as well as how they deal with everything at a pace that would drive most people mad.

 

I don’t think that I will ever get over the beauty of Panderia.  The lush green hills, jungles and fields almost mesmerize me.  Maybe it’s just the fact that the place is so exotic and totally alien to me because I can’t even begin to compare it to any of the other kingdoms that I have visited.  If beauty were left undisturbed like this has been for centuries, I’m sure that some idiot would have to find a way to destroy it or do their damnedest to wreck it. 

 

I know that I was laughing at Kal and his talk of his little farm that he has started and his dreams of actually setting up a house there was part envy on my part. There are times that I truly do envy him his youth and some of the naiveté that is still lingering there.   I know that I would like to be able to find a little place like his and just sit back and enjoy it the way that he seems too.  I’m sure that eventually things will settle down and I’ll be able to find a place of my own too – then, I will be able to bring Amyn over for a while too, I miss my wife and I know that she would fall in love with the place as much as I have.  There is so much here that I would like to show her, the land is unbelievably beautiful and there is still a feeling of peace in some of the more isolated areas that haven’t been tainted by the Horde or the Alliance just yet.  I would like to share those sunrises and sunsets with her – they are magnificent.  Of course, we could go back to the things that we used to do in Feralas too, just sitting a lake somewhere in Panderia and looking at the stars in the sky – oh, those were peaceful times. 

 

Yes, even though there is a war going on, I’m still finding the time to get off to myself and do some hunting and fishing.  Of course, some of the people think I’m taking unnecessary risks by not going out in a party but they have got to understand that I need some time alone.  I need to mull things over in my mind and to escape into the fantasy of my mind when I have the free time to do so.

 

Of course, Pan acts like a kitten most of the time when we’re out together these days and just enjoying the land.  He is as curious as he always was about things; however, I think that he has learned his lesson about the porcupines that roam around in the Jade Forest.  Of course, we have our own brand of these beasts in Kalimdor and the Eastern Kingdoms – they aren’t as big.  I know that he wasn’t real thrilled with the quills that he got in his snout; however, he did save his dignity a bit by killing the beast anyway.  I know that I have laughed at the silly cat a few times – the flying leaps that he would take at the cranes would cause me to get tears in my eyes with the laughter.  Yes, it’s just like things were when he was young cat.

 

I know that a freelance hunter could have a field day in Panderia.  The leather alone is phenomenal, not to mention that it’s even more plentiful that it ever was back home.  I know that I spend some time each week, when I can spare it, go out hunting and shipping it back to Orgrimmar for resale.  It’s profitable; just wish that I had more time to dedicate to it.  I know that if my time were my own, I could lose myself up here for months at a time.  I know that Amyn would be in her element here in this land, she loves to hunt and fish as much as I do.

 

No, I hadn’t forgotten what it was like to be in charge of a group of Rangers, however, these men are like a new breed, or maybe they are just young inexperienced troops in some things.  They are learning the new ways of this war as I am.  It’s not easy making some of the adjustments; however, everyone seems to be taking it in stride.  Yes, I’ve lost a few men and I’ve had to sit down and write those letters to their families, however, it could have been much worse.  The hardest thing about having a command and losing men in battle is to sit there and write letters of condolence to their families – I just imagine the pain they are enduring because I haven’t lost a child of my own yet, however, I have lost many friends in battles in the past.

 

I was laughing at my lovely bride yesterday when she said that she was going to go do some hunting for some turkeys outside of Stormwind.  She’s really proficient with this sort of thing and she wanted me to join her, however, I did beg off and was able to spend some time here in the office and just relax for a while.   I even need time alone when I’m here in Dalaran and it’s hard to come by with the kid in the house.  Of course, when Mom leaves, the little guys are left with their grandparent, which does give me some leeway with what I want to do.

 

Faendra and I had a chance to talk about the business and she seems to enjoying it as much as I always did.  However, she is wondering when Dawnglory is going to grace us with his presence again here in Dalaran.  I am assuming that she is still somewhat smitten with the culprit and I voiced my opinion on that again and all she did was give me this wolfish grin.  Well, to each his own, I suppose.  I told her that I thought that he would be showing up here by tomorrow night at least, he wasn’t going to miss the holiday, no matter what was going on in Panderia.

 

Speaking of Dawnglory again.  I am happy to say that he is just as awestruck as I am with Panderia.  However, he seems to be scared to death of the Panderian women for some reason.  I think that they have him in awe because none of them seem to take him seriously although I will have to admit that he has been behaving himself when it comes to the drinking and the carousing around when he’s off-duty.  Not that he has grown a halo or anything of that sort, however, he has been saying that he needs to get back to check on his sister and to make sure that she is behaving herself – I don’t think that he has to worry about her not behaving because I know that my sisters are keeping an eye out for her because she’s never been quite the same since that ordeal with the demon.

 

Oh, by the Light!  It’s getting late and I’m still sitting here just kind of daydreaming and letting my mind wander a bit.  Guess I should get off my backside and go see if Amyn needs or wants to do anything.  I know what I’d like to do, however, that would mean that we’d never get out of the bedroom until dinner tonight. 

 

Fnor Morningstar

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