Hey It’s a New Journal…

November 29th

Dear Journal,

Well, yes, I’ve decided that I can afford to buy a journal and start keeping track of things because you never know when you’re mind is going to start dropping things here and there.

I suppose that I should introduce myself to start with so that this makes a little bit of sense if someone happens to find it at some point.  My name is Hazey Smythe and I live in Under City with my sister Brianca.  We weren’t always dead, you know, we had lives once upon a time and looked like anyone else.  Now, well, I guess we’re dead although I don’t feel that way – just a bit more boney.

I guess that when the plague hit, it wiped out our entire family and we’re the only ones left that we are aware of.  No more little brothers, no more Ma and Pa, just us.  I know we’ve gone back to the farm and we didn’t see any signs of anyone else living there that hadn’t been munched on – one thing about being Forsaken, you never have to be hungry for long.

We’re still trying adjust to this new life and it’s a pain in the butt, if I had one, I’m sure that it would be hurting. One thing that I have to admit is that I do have a better looking set of boobs than I used to have, had them installed the other day, one is a tad bit smaller than the other one but you can’t expect perfection here in the labs, I suppose.

We have found ourselves a nice little corner to hold up in for a while.  No one seems to bother us and we were able to get some really decent coffins to sleep in.  I just had some new satin put in mine and picked up a not real holey wool blanket and a nice feather pillow from some fool that just happened to be asleep when I borrowed them.  Now, Bri has put some nice touches to our little place, she actually was able to sneak into Gilneas the other night and found a nice big rug to put on the floor, the stone can get a little chilly even to our boney feet.  One thing about it is that it’s real quiet – too quiet.  I suppose we do breathe because Brianca still snores sometimes and I have to smack her in the face to make her stop.  I have to be careful not to make her lose her nose though – she really got upset the last time that happened.

We really had a good time last week when the people were out running around like morons getting their feast supplies put together.  Yep, we were out there with the rest of them and eating like we had never had food in our lives.  We even got to go to places that we had never been – wish I could remember some of them, however, I took a shot in the head yesterday and it seems to have wiped out some of my more recent memories.

I know that we aren’t ones to sit around and bemoan the fact that our old lives are behind us and we have nothing left.  It gets real old real fast if you just sit on your haunches and think about it for very long.  I know that we were just thinking about the fact that we have no one to tell us what to do anymore – if we want to take a day off and just lay in our coffins reading a book or something, we can do that – well, unless we get tagged for some tasks that are unavoidable from the Lady herself.

Oh yes, we’ve heard all of the talk about this new land down south where the sun is warm, the game plentiful and there are funny looking bear people living there.  We’ve seen a couple of them here in the city and they do look like they would make for some good eating.  No, we didn’t try to bite any of the ones here, I think that wouldn’t be very hospitable on our part.  Maybe one of these days Bri and I will get a chance to get down there.  I know that all of the blood elves we’ve seen of late have been blabbing about the place and how wonderful it is except for the fact that the humidity messes up their fabulous hair.

Idiots to complain about a place because of their hair.  Oh well, we don’t have that problem, we just have to remember not to brush ours too hard because it comes out in handfuls as it is sometimes.  Same kind of things happens with the teeth too but we’ve found a way to replace those fairly easily.  I will have to admit that the Alliance must have the best dentists in the world, those people have the nicest teeth and usually a full set of them too.

I should say that Brianca and I are both freelance hunters and have tied up with a company in Dalaran, Morningstar Enterprises.  I’ve never met the big boss but our boss seems to be likeable enough for a blood elf.  All of that long blonde hair is kind of annoying but I suppose if I still had those feelings and parts, he’d be a real turn-on.   We just go out and get the skins that he needs and he pays us handsomely and on-time for them – that way we have some money in our purses rather than just the moths that I see some people carrying around.

Anyway, the pay is good and that’s why we’re looking around trying to find a little house for the two of us, maybe a couple of cats, just to make the place seem alive.   I suppose we could act like we’re farming a bit too, just to remind ourselves that we were people once.

Oh my, I do have to write about the fact that we saw Dranei female the other day.  No, we didn’t kill her because she was just trotting down the road.  Now, you can say what you want about the Forsaken but those Dranei are built wrong.  Their legs look like they were taken from some other species and put on wrong – they just look they bend wrong or something.  I know Bri and I just stood there with our jaws hanging open when the girl ran by.  She had a tail too, a really big tail that looked like she could use it for a weapon – I bet they do.

Oh well, it’s time for us to roll out of our coffins and get busy or we won’t be able to buy that farm in the near future.  Hope no glue-gloved idiot steals our stuff while we’re out, we’d be real upset if our coffins were gone.

Hazey Smythe

 

 

 

 

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