I am really enjoying my time in Panderia, the longer I am here the more I hate going back to the rest of the world. Sure there is a war going on, that’s why we’re here, however, I can actually have time to do other things than to just go on patrols, fight and try to make sure that I don’t get hurt while I’m at it.
My biggest thing here in Panderia is my farm. I’ve never had something of my own like this before and I am finding that I love it. I can grow my own crops, tend to the sheep and the yak that makes some pretty strange noises sometimes. Oh yeah, Dog – don’t know why he just sits around as much as Farmer Yoon sometimes and really doesn’t do much of anything other than to oversee the place. At least on the farm, I feel like it’s mine and I can do as little as I want or work myself into a good kind of fatigue and know that it’s all worthwhile.
Kae and I both spend a lot of time just sitting around the farm sometimes and we’ve actually become closer over the last few weeks. She laughs at my jokes and tells me what a dolt I am when I start getting into one of my moods. At least she doesn’t seem to think that there is anything wrong with our living arrangement at this point. I kind of like having a woman as my best friend anyway, there’s nothing that I have to prove to her that she doesn’t already know about me.
I just got a letter from Mother and I will have to admit that I am shocked and surprised that she decided to take the little guys from Shattrath and they are staying in Dolonaar so she can rejoin the Sentinels. I know that Dad is probably fit to be tied, however, he’s been attending to his duties here in Panderia and I know that Mom really wasn’t cut out to be the domestic goddess that he wanted her to be. I just hope that she will be careful, I don’t know what I would do if anything happened to her. She’s the one that has made everything feel like a family, even when she was just considered Dad’s mistress for all of those years even though they were mated.
I have made a few friends with the other fellows in our group and most of them haven’t really figured out how different I really am than they are or they just aren’t mentioning it. I do know that sometimes when they all decide to go out drinking and chasing women, I kind of beg off and head back to the farm because I just don’t think that I need to get involved in that sort of thing right now. Oh we joke and we have fun when we’re out on patrols, even though it is dangerous that doesn’t mean that we can’t have fun at the same time.
I don’t know about all of the political crap that is going on right now, I just try to keep my head down, do my job and just try to avoid any kind of discussion of it. Okay, we got ordered to Panderia, that’s all well and good – I think it’s good. I’ll be here a good long time unless some Horde decides that they need to plant my body in the ground somewhere – which I plan on avoiding for as long as possible.
Who said that life can’t be good in wartime? I don’t have any idea what they thought it was going to be like. I know that as long as I do what I am supposed to do, life is pretty awesome for me. Of course, I don’t get to go out on some of the assignments because my commander still doesn’t trust me completely because of my heritage, no big deal, I’m fine with it.
Another thing that I have found in Panderia that I never even was real interested in before is the archeology. What beautiful artifacts are up here and if I play my cards right, I can turn a good price for them with the collectors. All kinds of stuff and I’m seeing a lot more of Panderia than what my “duty” calls for me to see. I know that Kae gives me all kinds of grief sometimes because I’m not what they would call real sociable. If I’m not farming, I’m out digging around trying to find artifacts, doesn’t leave much time to get friendly with some of the people. I think I do better when I can get off to myself anyway, I can let my mind wander and just enjoy the beauty of this country.
I guess things didn’t work out with Josie because we never did see one another during Winter Veil and I haven’t even heard from her either. I still have her gift here at the farm stashed under the bed and if she ever gets in touch with me, I’ll give it to her. Somehow, things just weren’t meant to work out between us, I suppose. Maybe I was just too different and maybe there was something there that wasn’t quite right or even meant to be. Yes, I did care about her and I still do, however, if I can’t see her or hear from her, I guess that means she doesn’t want anything to happen. We can still be friends and the invitation that I gave her to come to visit up here is still open.
There are times that I think that relationships are just over-rated. I look at what my parents went through for all of the years that they have been together and from a child’s standpoint, it wasn’t all that great.
A lot of things weren’t right for them either, however, they seemed to be very happy after they got married. Things seemed to working as they should be until this war broke out. Dad’s a Sindorei and they look at things differently and Mom has her own way of thinking about things because of her duties and life with the Kaldorei. How they have ever been able to stay together for this long is always a shock to me when I think about it. I’m a product of their union and I hope they realize that it isn’t easy, not fitting into either race. I am a person of my own race – a half-breed. I am making my own way in this world because there really isn’t any other choice.
Oh, Vashlan would be wringing his hands and lifting his robes up all of the time if he was up here in Panderia. Poor little bookworm would be beside himself with the way that things are. No, he probably wouldn’t last all that long because he would be thinking about something else and a tiger would have taken a huge bite out of his butt before he realized it. I do miss him though, he has his own way of looking at things and with the magic that he is learning, he’s really got a twisted sense of humor. Oh I know he really does make Mother angry when he “sheeps” our brothers but it makes me laugh a lot.
I miss being at home sometimes but I like the freedom that I have in Panderia. I feel like I have learned so much about everything that it really makes my head spin.
I know that Dad is still very upset about losing everything up in Dalaran, however, I think that he was smart in getting us all out of there before the fertilizer hit the wind machine. I enjoyed living up there, it was beautiful and it did make you feel like you were just a little bit special and you could walk away from everything going on in the world when you got there. I miss the constant source of hot water and the bathtubs that we had in the house – now, that kind of Sindorei luxury I can deal with. I don’t think I’ve felt clean since we left there although the house in Nagrand is supposed to have the same stuff in it. I hope that Vash was able to find a spell to put on the bathtubs to make the water hot all of the time like it was in Dalaran, I’ll have to ask him the next time I go to Stormwind.
I looked back at my journal and I haven’t really written much since Winter Veil. Well, if the truth were to be known, I was too busy and I didn’t feel like writing anything down. I need to get back into the habit of writing in it again. I know Kae is looking at me grinning like a jackal because she says I look like a school boy doing his studies. She’s weird that way, she says I’m definitely all man, however, she likes it when the “little boy” shows up when we’re having fun. She keeps a journal too, however, I don’t think she writes in it very much.
One thing I have noticed about her that I find a bit odd. She doesn’t talk about her family a whole lot and doesn’t ever take leave to go home. I guess there is something there that she isn’t ready to talk about yet. One day she will and I won’t pry because I’ve mentioned it a couple of times and she gets this really sad look in her eyes and tells me that I’m lucky to have the family that I have. When she’s ready to talk about it, she will tell me, I’ll just have to wait and not drive her away with questions that seem to just make her sad.