Accepting Things For What They Are…

January 22nd

Dear Journal,

It has been months since I have taken the time to write in my journal, however, with this being a very cold and blustery day this morning, I think that I will take some time to sit by the stove and write for a few minutes.   I do dread the thought of getting out there in the cold icy rain even though setting the wolf free keeps me warmer than any clothing that I might have on.

This last year has flown by as if it had wings and so many things have happened that it makes it difficult sometimes to realize that as each month passed we were getting closer to starting a new year in this land.  I know that some of the older people long to return to return to Gilneas, however, I can remember how things were there and haven’t let those memories draw me into melancholy as some have.  I remember how it would rain and snow there and it seemed as if it never ended until Spring started bringing forth the new flowers.

We have been busy with the Pack, Oak and I.  I think that we have done right well with the group that we currently have.  We have had no trouble within our ranks and things have been plentiful.  We did go to Stormwind and started doing work for that import/export company that we found there.  The contracts seem to be many and we seem to fill them almost as quickly as we pick them up.  Sometimes Oak and I both go to Stormwind to deliver the goods and pick up new contracts that always seem to be awaiting us there.  It isn’t so bad working for a Night Elf woman, however, the Draeni that manages things for her is a bit on the rude side sometimes.  I know that she has tried to short shift us a couple of times, however, Oak is very good with figures and has been able to call her on it.

When we do make the trip to Stormwind, we can’t help but look at some of the available apartments and houses that are there that might be affordable to us.  However, we haven’t been able to find one that suits our needs just yet.  We don’t want to separate ourselves from the rest of the pack and would like to find a place large enough to accommodate all.  Oak says that we might have to wait another year before we will have enough money saved up or we might want to wander further afield than Stormwind and get a home in one of the smaller towns near there.  That is almost more appealing to me because Stormwind is very crowded these days with mercenaries and other people.

We have all been very busy this Fall and Winter, filling those contracts, and learning more about this land we’re in.  Oak says that the game here is definitely more plentiful than what we had in Gilneas, although some of the old timers will argue that point with him.  I know that haven’t wanted for anything and we always have food on our tables.

Oak was very sad the other day when he came home because he had gone to talk to some of his old friends and they didn’t seem to be even trying to fit in.  They are just living on what the Night Elves are kind enough to give them.  They sit under the tree and talk about the old times and how things were, the nobles, the peasants alike.  I don’t recall Gilneas being as grand as some of them seem to recall, however, I won’t argue with them, let them view the old world with their rose colored glasses.

Yes, I do miss the old life, however, I wouldn’t be doing some of the things that I am doing now if I were still there.  If it weren’t for the Curse striking when it did, I would have probably been attending balls looking for possible suitors to marry. Oh, I might have even been married by now and might have had children.  No, I would have more than likely been working with my Father and learning more of the things that a “wife” should know to run a proper household.

I do have to laugh sometimes because I can still sew the finer things and make them as pretty as I did back home when I have the time, when I’m not running with Oak and the rest of the pack.  I know that I have wondered many times what will become of us in the future, however, I don’t look too hard because I just want to see the pleasant things.  Life is not bad for me in this new land, I’m an equal with all of the others, no better and no worse.

I think about how things were in Gilneas sometimes and am very thankful that we have left that behind.  I know that if things were as they were back home, I would never have been with Oak and I would never know what it was like to have a man that would sit by a fireside and talk with me as an equal.  I would have been relegated to something else, talking with the other ladies at parties until my betrothed or husband decided that it was fitting for us to be on the dance floor.  No, I definitely prefer this life where I actually feel more comfortable.

Naturally, Oak laughs at me when we start talking and my education shows up from time to time.  Oak can read and write, however, he doesn’t take the joy from reading a book like I do because he has never had the time to sit down and really relax with one.  If this weather keeps up, I may go to the library and get a few books for all of us to read.  I do need to teach some of our young ones their letters – seems they didn’t make it to school at home because their families had no money. At least now these young ones have opportunities to better themselves without the old social barriers standing in their way.

Oh, we keep hearing that this person or that person has discovered a cure for the Curse, however, I think that we have all reconciled ourselves to the fact that this is how it is going to be.  At least our young ones have learned how to control themselves when we take them to Stormwind, no more accidental releasing of the wolf in the middle of the market like we used to have.  One of the rules that we have in the pack is that we do not show the wolf when we are in crowds of humans, dwarves and gnomes – we maintain our human form.  Even after all of this time, I know that some of the people are still unnerved by our ability to shape shift and I think that are extremely frightened of the beast.

Occasionally we do hear about the conflicts in Kalimdor and how the Horde seems to be imploding, however, I hope that Oak isn’t slipping off and fighting with the Sentinels as much as he once was.  I know that he tried to keep it a secret from me, however, there have been a few times when he had to explain away an injury that needed a bandage or stitching – he kept trying to tell me that he miss-stepped or some such nonsense but I know an arrow wound when I see it.  Besides, I know my man well enough to know that he isn’t that clumsy even when he has had a few drinks under his belt.

No, we haven’t gotten married yet and I don’t know if that will ever come to pass.  I know he loves me in his own way, however, I think that in his heart, he is still mourning for his wife and daughters.  I’ve never had children, so, I don’t know how it feels to lose one, however, I have lost my entire family and I have times that mourning never seems to want to end.  I miss my Father’s laughter and the kind touches of my Mother as she would braid my hair and talk to me about what a wonderful life I would have when I made the proper match.  Poor Mother always hoped that I would be able to wed a noble and bring our family to a higher station in life.

Oh, it does look as though the weather is breaking finally and I can hear Oak coming up the front walk now.  I suppose that he will want to gather the pack and head to Kalimdor to do some hunting and skinning.  I hope we get a chance to stop and do some fishing while we are at it, I have a yearning for some fresh fish.

Felley

 

 

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