It is apparent that I haven’t written in quite some time and it’s not because I have been terribly busy with work, however, I have taken some time off from Morningstar Enterprises that was well deserved on both a personal and professional level.
I know that I wrote previously that Fnor and I had a bit a indiscrete moment that probably made us both uncomfortable after the after the fact – we hadn’t had intimate relations since he got married to his mistress, a very lovely Kaldorei Sentinel that has been his mate in their fashion for many years. She also happens to be the mother of his legitimate children, I guess their legitimate in some way.
I know that it would be almost impossible for my daughter to be declared legitimate in any way shape or form, although, she is full-blooded Sindorei and I know whom the Father was and it’s none other than my handsome raven-haired employer. I’ve never told him but I think that circumstances are starting to present themselves to where I am going to have to do just that. It seems I am carrying another child, although I had taken all of the precautions for years, since we hadn’t been intimate for quite a while, I was ill-prepared for what did happen. Fortunately or unfortunately, the Fates had other things in store for us I suppose because there is a child and a child that I will happily give birth too.
Unfortunately, I am unable to go home to my family at present because my condition is very obvious and I had to leave Silvermoon City before my daughter and my lover realized what had happened. Yes, I know I am being very deceptive and I need to come out and tell them both the truth. How do you tell your child that she really isn’t your sister and that she is your daughter? How do I tell Fnor that he has fathered two children with me – one of which isn’t even born as of yet and the other is very much like him already. I’m surprised that he hasn’t guessed at the fact already because she has his smile, his mannerism and her personality is very much like his. Oh, I am already worried about the reactions from all parties concerned and I suppose that I should have addressed it years ago, however, I was hoping that it would come to pass of its own accord. I know now that I was being foolish and my Mother kept telling me that I should tell them both because she was getting too old to cover up the lie.
Now, here I sit by myself and my only companion is a maid that I hired to help the “widow” of one of our fallen heroes take care of the little cottage she is renting on the shore and the midwife that stops by daily to check on my advanced pregnancy. I have no problem playing the widow role because my emotions have been like one of those carnival rides, one minute happy and another minute I am very depressed. I miss Silvermoon, I miss my daughter and I miss Fnor most of all. I really haven’t let any of my friends in Silvermoon know where I am and my poor Mother is getting my mail – she’s truly the only one that knows where I am.
I know that Fnor acted like he was ashamed of the fact that he had broken his vows with his wife, in the Sindorei fashion, however, I know that when they were mated, he did wander a bit. Men are definitely strange creatures and the rules seem to be different from one situation to the next.
Oh well, the midwife has just told me that she is going to be staying here for the next few days, apparently, the birth is imminent and she laughingly told me that the Father would have been proud because she thinks it’s going to be a boy.
I hope it’s a boy and I hope he looks just like his Father and I hope that when I do tell Fnor about our children that he won’t get all hysterical and go off the deep-end. I know that it is going to complicate things for us all, Amyn, Fnor and I. I just pray to the Light that we can survive it all.