OOC – Not Dead…Just Busy

July 11th

Oh Hello!  No, I haven’t died yet, just been extremely busy in RL with all kinds of things, mostly trying to recover from a bacterial infection that I got somewhere – I don’t leave the house often, so, it must have come to visit in some form or other.

In the last couple of months we have celebrated birthdays, enjoyed Mother’s Day and Father’s Day, naturally and 4th of July, we stayed home and let the amateurs get out on the roads without us.  Yesterday was our granddaughter’s 5th birthday which doesn’t even seem possible.  Time really has a nasty habit of zooming by and all of a sudden it slaps you alongside the head so you’ll take notice.

Still working on going full on e-cig and doing quite well with it and reducing the nicotine intake quite nicely without turning into some kind of irrational monster.  I know the only way that I quit the last time was to go “cold turkey” and being knocked out on morphine for 10 days in ICU – don’t think I want to go that route or go through open-heart surgery again.

World of Warcraft Related

I feel like I have been fighting a battle of wills for the last couple of months with the game because not being able to play as much as I have normally has definitely put a crimp in things.  I have enjoyed what little I have actually done in Draenor, however, I think a lot of my attitude has to do with my disappointments with Blizzard more than anything with their business practices during this whole expansion.

I liked the Garrisons and was starting to get into the full swing of that while trying to level some more of my characters, however, with the advent of the gold mission changes, that kind of came to screeching halt.  I really only have one decently geared 100 and that is because I kind of stumbled into that without really watching closely.  Poor fellow has been kind of buggy since launch and I am not going to stop doing things on him anyway because he has been my main for 10 years.

Okay, I was very happy that Blizzard relented and decided to give us an opportunity to get flying introduced into Draenor, however, I wasn’t so happy at the thought of having more of the FaceBook applications added to the burden as well as rep grinding.

For the first time in ten years, I was actually contemplating taking a long hiatus or even quitting the game entirely, however, I decided that I have too much time involved in the game to just walk away from it.  I hope that things will get better in this expansion or the next one.  I definitely am not going to jump in and pre-order the next expansion nor will I purchase it straight away.  I really got more than a little it burned with WoD with the amount of money that I spent on the expansions and some of the boosts that I purchased to flesh out my guilds for the achievements.  Not gonna happen again.  I feel like I went to a used car lot and purchased a car and they had faithfully promised me that they would put the engine in sometime in the future – great looking car though, it just doesn’t move me anywhere.

Okay, hit the magic mark of ten years of playing World of Warcraft.  Whoopee!!   I know that I have enjoyed the time I’ve spend playing  the game and don’t regret it one bit although I am struggling staying subbed with my accounts due to the fact that I am a bit burned out.    Also hit the three year anniversary with WordPress – doesn’t seem that long ago that I started that either, however, it sure hasn’t been one of my highpoints so far this year.

As for my writing these days?  Well, to be very honest, I’m running out of ideas right now due to the fact that the majority of the people that I have played with over the years have left and I don’t really have that many folks to even chat with in-game.  Haven’t really done a whole lot of RP this year and don’t really have a full story line outlined in my head with the Alternate Universe throwing an anvil on that fantasy creation.   I may have to take a couple of steps back and rethink some of the storylines that I have had going for a while because I am just not feeling it and trying to fill in the blanks of absent players is a bit hard, especially if they decide to come back and you’ve written the wrong thing – had that happen to me years ago and it was not a pleasant thing.  Anyway, I will try to hang in there and get started on some more stuff eventually, just don’t expect it to be awesome at this point, I’m just not as immersed as I once was.

 

Life Is Just Not Fair…

July 1st

Dear Journal,

I have spent most of my life chasing after a man that lead me on and really didn’t care about me at all and it’s finally hit me that I have wasted the best years of my life chasing a dream that wasn’t shared with the other party.  I know that I have alienated friends and family over the years with my pursuit and obsession with this one man and it has finally crossed my mind that I am really wasting my time and making a fool of myself. I have literally thrown away all that is good in my life with chasing this dream of mine and I have nothing to show for it – no friends, no lovers and no fulfilled dream of marriage.

Yeah, I’m sitting here in Halfhill trying to drink myself into oblivion because I am sorry for myself and angry with myself for being such a fool for all of these years.   Yes, I came to Pandaria to get my man back from that harlot and I’m finding it more difficult to convince myself that it is even a possibility.   I have been spending all of my off-time in Halfhill in hopes that Dawnglory will show back up and I can get him to talk to me or maybe a bit more than just talk.

Yesterday I was in the market and I saw his woman doing some shopping.   At first I didn’t really recognize her because she has gotten rather large – a kid balanced on her hip and another one in her belly.  There is no doubt in my mind whom the children belong too because although I have tried to dig up dirt on her, there wasn’t any to be found that I could positive proof that she is playing around.  How she could let herself get knocked-up and have Dawnglory take off to this new place where they are sending all of the Rangers that worth their salt.   Well, maybe that’s her way of trapping him and keeping him because she knows that he wants a family to call his own – I hope that they are going to be his at least.

I’m sure that I could go there if I wanted too, however, I am not in the mood to do that right now.  I’m just marking my time and hoping that I don’t get orders to go there anytime soon.  I came to Pandaria to try to trap the man that I love and he slipped out of my reach within just a few weeks of my arrival.  Now, I’m obligated to fulfill my time with the Rangers here – that means no social life for me in Silvermoon and no real attachment to anyone here.

I know that I haven’t heard anything from my brother directly in months since he went to Draenor, however, I keep getting messages from that Zippie in Orgrimmar from time to time.  She is still expecting me to make arrangements to get to Orgrimmar and pick up contracts and possibly fill them – she doesn’t seem to realize whom she is dealing with.  After all, my brother is the owner the company and I should be respected for that and not be treated like just some other plebian worker.    I am a woman of good family and means – that means she should show respect to her betters.  Goblins only think of one thing and that is money – which is why she wants me to do these things here in Pandaria – the money is good though, I suppose I should relent and do some of them.

I’m still sitting here and drinking, thinking about all of the things that might have been or should have been and I can’t see why things didn’t work out the way that I had planned.  I should be the one walking around with that kid on my hip and one in my belly, not that upstart.  I mean, Dawnglory and I had a thing going that might have worked out if she hadn’t seduced him before I had a chance to do so.  Yes, she’s pretty, she’s educated and I’ve heard tell that she is from a good family, however, it’s not one that I have ever been in direct contact with and I can’t say that I had heard of them until this woman took my man away.  Who knows, it could just be one of those paid for family lineage things that some of the new money will try to pull off in Silvermoon.

Well, I’m going to stop trying to write because I am starting to feel like it’s futile and I’m getting sick on my stomach because the page seems to be moving all of the time.  I should head back to my farm – yeah, I got one not far from Dawnglory’s place and get some rest.  I’ll be busy for the next week with my duties with the Rangers, hunting down more deserters and trying to make some Night Elves unhappy again.

Faendra Morningstar