Getting Prepared for New Adventures

February 17th

Dear Journal,

It’s really been quite some time since I have written in journal, however, I’m back at the farm in Halfhill and I must admit that I am just enjoying being here and having some free time on my hands too. It feels good to be sitting on the front steps of the house in a robe and not having to be in full armor with my weapon close to hand. It’s just nice to enjoy sitting here in the sunshine and watching the animals play on the farm and not having people constantly charging up and asking for more “orders” to be given or to give me an urgent message about some nonsense.

Just having some privacy and being able to relax has been such a bonus to me and to Kae.  I don’t think that either one of us realized how exhausted we were with the constant being on duty required of us in Draenor.  Oh, there were things that we both like about commanding a Garrison, however, there were so many things that we disliked.  Not having any privacy was the main failing point in our eyes because we couldn’t seem to find that much time alone and even if we did, someone would find us. I know that one time we went all the way to Nagrand to find a place to be alone and I’ll be damned if one of the couriers showed up not even an hour after we arrived.  Talk about feeling awkward, we weren’t exactly dressed for the occasion, as it were.   It made me wish for the old days in our old Nagrand where we could slip away and find a nice floating island to spend some time alone and watch the clouds passing us by – nope that doesn’t exist on Draenor.

We still must go back to Draenor every few days to check on our place and to make sure that the duties are being carried out, however, we aren’t restricted to just that.  We are taking a bit of a respite from our service so that we can recoup some of our energy before we rejoin our forces in The Broken Isle, which, I am not looking forward too at all.  From everything that I have heard, I’m not looking forward to going even if that is supposedly our duty because I can’t say that I have ever been overly fond of the stench of Fel and I am not fond of demons in all shapes and sizes trying to take my life either.  I know that Kae and I were discussing some of this as we lay in bed the other night and neither one of us is anxious to get back into the old routine of going out on patrols and then racing like we’re on fire to get back to our headquarters to make our reports.   Getting back into the routine of Scout and Sentinel isn’t something that we will have trouble with, however, we will have a bit of trouble adjusting to taking orders from someone else when we have gotten so used to having control of that sort of thing ourselves. Oh well, we’ll go where our duty requires us to go even if we’re not going to like it.

I always wonder if we are ever going to have a peaceful time in our lives.  I know that my Father does talk about a time when things were not so chaotic and full battles going on constantly.  That was long before I was born, although my parents were already mated at that point – she was in Shattrath at that point and my Father was in Dalaran getting his company established there as a civilian mercenary – that’s when all the Import/Export business started and made it possible for us to have other branches of the company all over Azeroth and represented in both factions.  If only some of the people realized that Morningstar Enterprises and Shadowmoon Enterprises was owned and operated by the same family, they just see different faces running things wherever they happen to be.  Maybe it wouldn’t be such a good idea for them to know because one company is owned by a Sindorei and the other by a Kaldorei that happen to be married to one another – I’m sure some people would consider them both to be traitors, not only to their factions, which would be a bad thing, I’m sure.

I know that Kae still gets ridiculed for being involved with a half-breed, however, she has taken it all in stride these last few years and I must admire her for that sometimes.  It hasn’t made her life an easy one with the Sentinels, however, she thinks that some of them are just envious of the fact that not only am I her Scout, I’m also her lover.  I’m also starting to give more thought to us taking our vows at the moonwell in Darnassus too, it’s time that we made our relationship a bit more permanent.  I know that she would be a lot happier and it might make her life easier in the troop.  I know that I would be one of the few mates that would still be seeing active duty with their spouses and I would not be relegated to something else.

We have been talking about having children sometime soon too.  One of the things that I don’t like is the fact that she would like to utilize the communal type of child-rearing that she had growing up and I am more inclined to go along with the way that my parents raised me.  I know my family and I love them, is that not a good thing?  I know that the Sentinels feel that their children gain more experiences of life without being held too close to their parents, however, I feel that the kids are being cheated out of a foundation of having a family and what that truly means.  Oh, I can just know how my Mother would react to a grandchild of hers being reared without knowing their family – the explosion would be heard all the way through time to Draenor.

Ah well, I’m sure that things will happen in due time.  Kae and I are not in a hurry to change things dramatically in our lives now.  I know that things are still chaotic with our war on the Legion at this point and we both know that things can change dramatically with that situation.  We may not have all the time in the world to do all the things that we want, however, if we’re both happy and healthy, we shouldn’t change things at this point.

I know that I am starting to feel like my Sindorei parent in the way that he would love to have a time of peace for a while.  He has spent his entire life being involved in wars and serving the Horde – he would like to have the time to just enjoy life with the concerns of a war adding stress to it.  I wonder if we will ever see that so-called peace in my lifetime?

Kaldor Shadowmoon

February 12 2017 – OOC – Whee!

February 12 2017

 

I’ve had kind of an interesting week for myself in World of Warcraft.  Not that I did anything too exciting or anything, however, I did decide of sorts with the way that I have been playing.  I have been plodding along on my main and it sure doesn’t seem like I am getting anywhere and hedging around the edges of burnout even if I hadn’t played for a while – it just seems sort of unfulfilling in Legion sometimes. 

Sometimes while I am playing in Broken Isles it just seems like it is never-ending and that I can’t really see any progress to speak of, which is kind of frustrating. It seems like I spend much of my time just trying to get caught up with my always full quest log and trying to see if I can accomplish anything.  Still haven’t finished doing the reps to where I can to do the World Quests and it seems like that is something that I should have been doing months ago – still not geared up the way that I should be either and I know that that is my fault because I haven’t been playing as much to get the stuff.  I know that I am always reading on the forums about artifacts and such, have yet to see one or gain one on any of my characters that are leveling in Legion yet.  I haven’t really done any of the group activities either because I’m not part of a group with my guild – it’s just me. Soloing isn’t all that bad and I do have access for the dungeons and such, however, my biggest problem is that I don’t have any enchants on anything yet and haven’t felt like blowing a lot of gold on it because as soon as I do, I’ll end up replacing said gear.  Yeah, the dual edged sword thing. Still questing and still doing the storylines as I can and trying to figure out what is really going on.  Sometimes the quest lines complete and sometimes they just lead me further into the abyss of “not knowing” what the heck I’m doing. 

I know that I can’t be the only one that enjoys playing in Legion and at the same time I feel like some misplaced tourist that is trying to find their way through a country that has no maps, no directions and certainly no one that speaks the same language. As for Class Fantasy – well, I still have the fantasy about the fact that my hunters were always a lot stronger that some of the mobs and it isn’t every day that I get killed by a butterfly.  Tried a few other classes and have the same feeling of “something’s not quite right here” when I am playing.

Anyway, to make a long story short, I’m playing a lot in the old content on my alts because I still enjoy the game and try to lose myself in it for a few hours at a clip.  I’m avoiding dealing with the realities in my life and that I am just going to mark time for the next few years until something changes for the better – scary stuff going on in life right now.  I used to be quite the traveler in my younger years and no problems with leaving the country and coming back – now, I’m just worried about friends and families that have gone on trips and worried if they will be allowed to come back.

I’ve had a lot of fun leveling some of my little guys and romping around and just having fun.  I love my Pandas, Goblins and Gnomes – throw a few of my Worgen in there for grins because they all seem to have different personalities.   A lot of them I haven’t introduced to the public yet in any of my blogs because I am still not writing as much as I would like.  I like to RP with some of the newer players occasionally and enjoy the chats with the little guys – you never know what the Goblins are going to come up with as a reaction to things.

I had a horrible week with BattleNet and World of Warcraft.  I had continually running downloads from the Battlenet that would never complete, lag, disconnects and all manner of problems in game.  After three days of working with that, I finally bagged it all and decided that nothing was going to resolve the situation other than a complete download again.  Did the repair and all that, however, the downloads would never complete.  Frustrated is just a mild word that I can put in print now. Completely downloaded BattleNet and WoW – took 24 hours to download the game because Bnet was still being a bit wonky, however, it’s all working great now “knocks on wood” and I hope it lasts for a while.  With Blizzard using Bnet as the key to everything, when that gets messed up, you’re totally SOL in more ways than one.  Still running some extremely low FPS in some areas of the game, as are some of the other players, and I refuse to upgrade a new machine at this point, plus, I don’t have the money after all the medical issues lately.  If the game is still playable in some fashion, I’m okay with that.

Blizzard did attempt to help me with the issues that I was having and some of the stuff might have worked if it wasn’t all done via ticket which I was no longer patient enough to wait several hours for more instructions. Bnet was so fubar that I couldn’t use the chat sessions because it would cut out every time I finally got connected to someone.   What a wonderful experience for Blizzard and myself on that one.

Oh well, time to head back into the game for a while and stop whining about all the tech issues I’ve had.  I just hope that it keeps on working for a few days so I can play and try to bury some of animosity towards it.

 

February 8th – Ponderings

Written in very cursive script denoting the maturity and education of the author

 

February 8th

 

Dear Journal,

Whew!  I think I have finally gotten the stench of Fel out of my hair and now I’m cleaning my armor of the debris that I always seem to pick up these days.  Luckily, the Fel isn’t as acidic as I’ve discovered in other areas that will slowly corrode the armor and cause it to become somewhat weak at certain points.  I think that Amyn and I both need to start considering getting some replacement armor soon because we’re starting to look a bit more battle worn than usual.  The only good thing about the Broken Isles has been the fact that we can spend time together without people being any wiser – who cares what a Sentinel and Ranger are doing if you have demons breathing down your neck every time you leave your Hall?  It does remind me of the time we spent in Outland all those years ago, when we would venture out together to get things done for the company – it was fun back then, now, it’s just another chore added to our list of things that we must get completed in a timely manner.  I’ve been involved in some messy campaigns in the past, however, with the Legion invading while we were doing our duty in Draenor has stretched my loyalty to the limit. I know that Amyn and I laughed at the fact that we’re just getting too damned old for this stuff, however, we do it for our people and for our children.

Of course, we’re still very discreet when we are in public because one never knows if one might have caused someone some concern with how friendly we appear to be, considering the factions are still miles apart in what they believe is the way to live.  At least we’re not trapped in Draenor anymore with a Garrison full of people that would be all too happy to cause issues for their commanders.  Oh, we still remember all too well how much we both enjoyed some of the more secluded places in Shadowmoon with clear sparkling water with shelter from the weather.  We’re keeping out home in Halfhill like we normally do and enjoy going back there frequently these days.

I enjoyed my time in Draenor for the most part because I could see my wife and our son, Kal, almost as much as I wanted but my heart still goes out to the people that couldn’t ever seem to get the leaves they needed to return to Azeroth.   I know that Draenor cost Dawnglory more than anyone would ever imagine and I hope that he will be able to endure the pain that it has caused him – to lose your woman and your children while you’re off doing your duty must be the worst feeling a man could ever have.  I know that he is extremely lonely and, at times, bitter for the loss even though he tries to keep that hidden.  He is still looking for them too.  He still has transferred to the Broken Isles yet and I think that that is probably for the best because I know how he gets when he is grieving about something.   He tends to take his frustrations out with wild daring actions which will eventually get him killed.

I know that I am really kind of happy that Amyn and I seem to have more time together these days although I will admit that I miss the boys quite a bit.  We’ve talked about setting up some time for the whole family to meet at the house in Nagrand Continue reading

Still Searching…

*Some coarse language used, please do not read if you’re easily offended. *

 

February 2nd

Yo Book!!

It’s been a while since I have written in my journal, however, I have been rather busy trying to keep up with my fucking duties and trying to find my wayward woman and my children.  It’s not been easy and I have spent a hell of lot of time trying to figure out where she could have fucking disappeared too.

I think I’ve gone through spells of depression and then I got angry and back to the depression again. I have my own way of grieving and sometimes it works better than it has currently.   Romy was such a large part of my life and the kids were everything I had ever hoped for – now, they are gone.  I think the loneliness is the hardest part to handle and it will be with me until I can get some closure on this or at least fucking find them.  I know that she was stubborn and was always good at taking care of herself, however, I never thought that she would just pack up and leave like she appears to have done.   When I am not on duty, I’m trying to follow up on any clues that I might have uncovered and it has taken this long for me to sit here and just write.

I’ve talked to so many people in Pandaria and searched the place until I can hardly stand it – she and the children are not here and it does point more to her leaving and going to Northrend. Of course, tracking down the pack that she was always with before has been more of a challenge than anything else.

Let me explain this a little bit.  Romy was with a group of family members that have chosen a different lifestyle and handle things more in the ways of wolves.  They have the Alpha males and females and everyone raises the kids together.  They tend to hunt in packs or something of that nature which has allowed them to survive in the northern part of Northrend.  I had met them all before we were together and had talked to many of the leaders, bonding with them.   Now, I can’t even seem to find all the old encampments.  It’s almost as if they have disappeared.

Of course, there is another branch of the family that is more civilized that the Northrend group, although, that could be debatable.  Naturally, the branch that lives in and around Silvermoon are more of the matriarchal society than anything else. It almost reminds me of how the Night Elves live most of the time than true Sindorei.  I think that these traditions and habits that they appear to have are more based on High Born practices than most want others want to show.  Makes me wonder about the family bloodlines a bit but that is beside the point.  I just want to find Romy and my children and get them back home with me.  Sometimes the loneliness is more than I can stand.

Romy had left some pictures behind when she left the farm in Half Hill and I have gathered them up and put them away so that nothing will happen to them and she can have them when she returns. Pictures of us being happy together and pictures of the children.  Yes, I finally got to see what my boy looks like and I must say that he looks more like his Mother than he does me – the red hair and coloring.  I bet he will grow up to be a very handsome young man.   I hope that I can find them all before he is a man – just knowing that they are all out there somewhere makes my heart keep hope that we will be together again someday.  I know that there are times that I have a terrible time holding back my tears and they are even streaming down my face as I write.

How could such happiness just disappear, how could the love we had seemed to have changed for some reason?  I’m afraid that I have truly brutalized Faendra with my suspicions that she might have had something to do with their disappearance to the point that she wrote to her brother and begged him to tell me that she had nothing to do with them being gone.  Yes, she did say that she still loved me, however, she would never do anything to Romy or the babies – they were mine and she knew how much I loved them.

Ah well, I suppose that I should quit writing tonight and head out to do some wandering around and visiting with some of the neighbors here in Half Hill.  I know that the women always ask if I had found Romy yet, which tears the wound open a bit.

Fnar Dawnglory

 

 

OOC – February 1st – trying to make a comeback…again

February 1st, 2017

 

I must admit that all my grand plans of getting back on track with my writing took a bit of a detour due to medical reasons and a weeklong hospital stay.  Not a fun thing to go through, however, that part of the medical issues is dealt with and I must go back in a couple of weeks to have some more surgery done.

I have been taking some heavy-duty medication for the last few years and sometimes medicine can cause other issues that are sometimes overlooked because of side effects.  Unfortunately for me, some of my stomach issues were caused by internal bleeding that had been going on for months.  Yep, I kept wondering why I was so tired all the time and felt extremely uncomfortable.  I finally got fed up with it and had a long talk with my doctor which caused him to run some additional tests – seems I was more than a quart low.  Anyway, bedrest, blood transfusions and even more in depth medical procedures and it seems that they have the bleeding stopped.  I do have a hernia that needs to be fixed in a couple of weeks, however, they wanted to go ahead and fix the current issues and give my body a chance to heal from that before they started doing the manual slice and dice on that.  Getting older is sure a pain in the backside, however, the alternative sounds less appealing.

I know that I still seem to be taking a long time to get the energy back and there are still times that I can get uncomfortable but not anything like I went through before.  Oh well, at least I can take all the time that I need to get caught up with the things going on in World of Warcraft.  One of the things that I can honestly say is that when I feel tired or don’t feel up to playing video games, I go take a rest and watch television of just kind of be lazy and do things in moderation.

I must admit that if I get any further behind in Legion it is going to seem like I am playing the game backwards.  Still only have the one 110 and a couple in the pipeline with 101 or 102 now, however, I just can’t do the full-on press to get them leveled up like I used too.  Legion is fun for the most part, however, there are times that I feel that it is more than a little bit redundant and I still get lost on the maps most of the time.  Yeah, I know, sense of direction sucks in the game.  I have a lot of quests to turn in and can’t seem to find the place to turn them in without jumping through hoops and fighting my way back to where I thought they were.  I’ll get there one of these days if my quest log doesn’t fill up all the way again – which it seems to do daily if I play.