A Death Knight Can Be Happy…


August 22nd

Dear Journal,

I’m still having a slight chuckle about a recent conversation that I had with a young Bull in the market here in Halfhill.  Naturally, he definitely isn’t in the same condition that I am in, however, he was puzzled about how it was that I can remain so jovial and appear to be happy. After giving it some quick thought, my response was that I am happy because the alternative didn’t seem to be so pleasing.  Being truly dead is something that I am not ever going to look forward to although the teachings have us believe that we will be in a happy place with our loved ones and in the full care of the Earth Mother.

Yes, I still go by my Death Knight name that was given to me when I was changed which is Sadheart, however, the people that knew me from before still call me by my given name of Naton Cloudhoof.  What is in a name you ask?  Well, I was none too pleased with being changed into my current state and that was why I was given the name that I was in Archerus.   It fits me because there are days that I willingly admit that I wish that I was more mortal than I am currently – there are so many things that in my mind that I would like to do but this shell of a body no longer works in those ways.  At least I am with my family, watching them grow older as the time passes, however, I am with them in the here and now which is what makes me happy.

Why do I laugh sometimes?  Well, just because I’m Death Knight doesn’t mean that I can’t have a sense of humor because I most assuredly do.  I can enjoy life with living as much as they can and I don’t see why that wouldn’t put a smile on anyone’s face.  I can enjoy things as much as the next fellow.  Do I have the same wants and needs as a living Bull – well, in my mind I do, however, there are certain things that don’t work quite the same any more since I have joined the ranks of the unliving.   Yes, I would still like to have a family of my own some day, however, the possibility of having children has been taken from me, although, I wouldn’t mind marrying a woman that already has children as long as those said children would accept me for the person that I am and not “what” I am.

At least I have my business to keep me busy and yes, I do have to take a run every now and again to make sure that my Rune Sword is probably fed and satiated with its own type of wants.   I know that it is hard for some people to realize that I am still a Death Knight and I do have those moments where the Knight has to become what he is – that’s usually when I will take off for a couple of days and do my thing.

My whole life or unlife changed for me when I became a Death Knight and some of the things that I have done in the past I am not exactly proud of and try to push those memories to the back of my mind, sometimes they escape and come racing back to the forefront, however, I have learned how to control that part pretty much.  My life also took another huge change when I was released from the power of the Lich King because I was given control back to myself – no more voices commanding that I kill this or that and no more orders coming from on high that would direct me to places and do things that I would rather not think about.   Yes, I will admit that these changes have all been a part of what makes me as I am today.

I will have to admit that I am not too unhappy with working for Morningstar Enterprises because the money is good, I know that my family will always be taken care of because Commander Morningstar is that much of a family oriented person.  He actually bailed Maha and I out from being in service to the Horde and we’re contract people for him these days.  Not that I was disloyal or anything to the Horde, however, I wasn’t too keen on following that crazy man that called himself a Warchief.   He lost whatever shred of loyalty I had to the faction when he started his nonsense about the Pure Horde – which meant Orcs.  Well, I know that Baine has sworn fealty to the Horde, however, I don’t think that he would disapprove of what it is that my family and I are doing, we’ve aligned ourselves with a Blood Elf and follow what he wants for his company.  I know that I am not planning on ever getting myself involved in any kind of military action again in the near future, my body is tired, my mind is tired and I want to enjoy what this unlife has to offer to me now – a home, my family and an inner peace that I haven’t known since the days prior to becoming a Death Knight.

Yeah, I guess you should say that I am happy with my lot in life.  Being a Death Knight is not all that I am, it’s being Naton Cloudhoof and being able to have some semblance of fitting back in with my people again and enjoying what all that entails.  Sure, I get strange looks from people that still believe all of the old tales of the Scourge and how Death Knights were mindless killing machines, which we were, I won’t deny that, however, we all have been given a chance to fit back in with the rest of the people and I am going to take a gamble by enjoying it, whatever it brings.

I have spent the last few days spending some time with my baby brother, Tahfal and he is still following his teachings of being a Lightwalker, which is fine with me.  If he is happy following that sort of thing, I am not going to pass judgment on him for it.  He has been able to blend the teachings of the Earth Mother and the teachings from the Light into what he feels comfortable with.  No, he isn’t always righteous and good and I know this – he’s still very much a young bull and will learn in time what it is that he really wants out of his life and his beliefs.

Naton “Sadheart” Cloudhoof

 

Slow Down…Enjoy Unlife


June 8th

Dear Journal,

I know that I really shouldn’t be having as much fun as I am, however, that just doesn’t seem to be the case.  I think that I have finally found the place where I can be happy, enjoy this unlife of mine to the fullest and still just keep going.  I have never been one of those Death Knights filled with angst and anger at what was done to me, however, I have had to bear the brunt of the shame and the disgust of some of my kin.  Oh well, it’s there loss and my gain because I will live this unlife the way that I see fit.

I still show respect for my elders and still worship the Earth Mother as I was taught as a young bull, however, I think that I am more appreciative of the things that happen than some of the living are.  Oh yes, I can go anywhere in Azeroth that my heart desires and do what I want to do which is mostly work and enjoy the fruits of my labors.

Once again, the whole family went to the Faire and had a marvelous time.  I still laugh at Nahai and Tahfal with their wild antics at the Faire.  It’s not even a contest which of us happens to be the best at the canon ride – me.  I love it, I’ll go as many times as I can and I always just get such a rush from flying through the air and hitting the target every single time.  Oh, I may not get the bull’s-eye, however, I do make it more often than m brothers.   I’m also the best dancer too – even if I do have to say so myself. I love to dance and be happy – just taking the joy in the music and seeing other people happy too.

I think I just enjoy the atmosphere of the Faire and that’s why I like to go when we have the chance.  I always know that I will spend at least a full day in Thunder Bluff doing things for some of the tribe members there.  Mostly repairs to the old copper pots and talking with some of the elders there.  It isn’t that I mind it at all because it makes me feel like I am home and I belong there with my people even if some of them are afraid that I might go off the deep end one day and turn back into a killing machine again.

Mom and Nahai are almost finished with their house on their farm now and I expect that they are getting anxious to move in.  I know that Maha will miss having them around because they love to chatter away about all of the things that they are seeing in Pandaria and some of the things that they are doing.  Naturally, Nahai thinks that the flying is the best in Pandaria and the wind drafts carry him much further there than they do in Kalimdor.  I don’t know, he might be right, except that I think that he is just enjoying life as much as he can right now.   Mom loves the farm and she is enjoying getting things set up with her own little house.  She and Maha spend hours trying to decide what piece of furniture would fit better in one place and they do like to carry on about the food.

I know that this is going to sound funny coming from the likes of myself, however, I don’t think that it really matters since no one else will ever read my journal, I’m kind of a boring fellow.   I am just enjoying what life has been giving me since we all made the change to Pandaria.  There doesn’t seem to be the bias here that I used to sometimes feel when I was in the Bluff.  I can stroll into the market here, people know my name, I can talk to whomever I choose and just feel happy about my life as it is.

I honestly think that Mom acts like she is ten years or even twenty years younger since she came here to Halfhill to live.  She’s always singing and acting like she is happy when she is around the house.  She and Maha have gotten along a lot better up here too since Maha finally told Mom that she hasn’t found a bull to her liking yet, however, when she does, she will be sure to let her know right away.  Mom wants grandchildren, plain and simple.  At least she hasn’t been after me to find a mate because she knows that it wouldn’t do any good if I did anyway because there just won’t be any children coming from me since my change.  Ah well, at least I can enjoy the little ones that the other people have here in Halfhill with them.  Someday I may find a mate, not just for procreation but someone that I can care about and they will care about me as the man that I am, not the Death Knight.  I can’t see anything wrong with a fellow wanting a family, even if they aren’t his – it would make me very happy if I could find someone that can accept me for what I am and see the person that lives in this dead body as they really are.

I have had a chance to get out and do some exploring on my own here lately and I will have to admit that I find a great deal of comfort at the Tian Monastery.  It’s beautiful and not too far off the beaten path and close enough to home that I can go there and get back in a short amount of time.  I like talking to the monks and I like watching the training going on there.

I finally put together a good set of armor that I am selling through the auction house – naturally, there will be fittings to be done which will cost a bit extra, however, I am going to try to make enough money with my work that we don’t have to worry about finances again.  I’ve also sent back several pieces to Zippie so that she can see if there is a good market for them in Silvermoon and Shattrath – I also get a bonus if they sell well too.   I will have to admit that my happiest times are when I am standing at the forge and working on things that I know people will like and enjoy for years to come.  I don’t care if it is pot or if it is armor, I just enjoy the whole thing of creating something.

Well, crap, wouldn’t you know that I would get the laundry detail with Mom today too.  I thought Nahai was going to go with her to do it, however, he has some flirtation going on with one of the local Tauren ladies that he had planned to go on a picnic with.  Oh well, I don’t mind, at least I know that Mom will be safe with me and won’t be left standing there by the stream wondering where I went – Nahai can get distracted by the craziest things – oh, oh, a shiny or oh, oh a really big herb.  I do understand that he is still young, however, I do sometimes wonder if all that flying hasn’t shifted his brain a little off-kilter somewhat.

 

Naton “Sadheart” Cloudhoof

Living in Pandaria


May 23rd

 

Dear Journal,

While I am aware that I only write in this book to keep my memories fresh it always a great help when you get to be my age to have them recorded somewhere.  Ah yes, with age, your mind has become somewhat cluttered with all things past and present – this will help me keep things sorted out a little bit for my own personal reasons.  I know that I have long since forgotten some of the things that happened to me as young girl, however, occasionally, I do get a glimmer of those things that once were.

While I may not be staying in Thunderbluff as much as I once was, that doesn’t mean that I don’t long for the companionship of my old friends there which causes me some sadness.  I have started going back home to see my friends and to visit with my youngest son, Tahfal.  Poor thing is working himself into a frenzy with his studies – being a Light Walker is no easy task and requires a lot of study, dedication and sometimes a great deal of loneliness.    I always thank the Earth Mother that he is my youngest son and one that looks very much like his sire.  He has always been a gentle soul, a bit spoiled because he was just a baby when my husband I went on our fateful trip that changed all of our lives.  Now, he’s a young man coming into his own, albeit, not the way that I had envisioned, however, it is his life to do with as he wishes – that has been the way of our clan for generations.

Nahai and I really did go ahead and pooled our resources and bought the farm next door to Naton and Mahamura.  We’re still staying with them until we can get the proper repairs done on the house.  I know that the land was really what we purchased, however, one would think that the price might have been lowered due to the fact that we can’t live in the house there.  Oh well, we will get it done as soon as possible.  We’re also still helping Maha and Naton with their farm as well as working on our own.

I can only speak for myself with any real assurance of not telling the truth as it is known to me.  I know that I truly love Pandaria – it’s big, it’s open and the living is at a slower pace than it is in Mulgore.  I don’t think that it will ever replace my feelings for my true “home” however, in my sunset years, it does seem to make life easier in this land.   Oh, there are dangers here and there are many areas of the land that I have not ventured into yet.

Nahai and I have both enjoyed the plentiful herbs that are in this area of Pandaria.  In only a few short hours we are able to gather what we would have taken a week or more to gather when we were at home.  I know that both of us take joy in the flying, the freedom that we have to roam wherever we choose.  I, for one, give thanks each day to the Earth Mother that I came to join m children here and for the safety that they seem to have here.

I have met so many people  since I have been in Pandaria.  They all seem to be happy here and even though there are still areas of conflict, the people seem to take joy in just living.  So many young people and there are a lot of us older folks that are slowly filtering in as time goes on.   I know that I have made many friends in the Valley of Four Winds with the Pandaren.  They are a people that just take joy in living and enjoying every moment that they are given.   I am sure that they aren’t  too thrilled with the invasion of all of these folks from the other continents in Azeroth.  I just hope that we don’t destroy more than what we putting into place – the farms, the forests are plentiful with everything that we all need to survive.

True, there are the Orcs that have taken it upon themselves to destroy as they go, as is their custom and history, however, most of us here try to repair the damage before it is too widespread.  I would hate to see Pandaria  get damaged beyond repair.

One of the things that I have noticed is that there seem to be more of the employees of Morningstar Enterprises showing up in the Valley of Four Winds.  Rumor has it that the company is planning on opening up another warehouse in Pandaria so that we don’t have to ship our products to Silvermoon as often.  I know that Maha and Naton are very excited about this too because they hated to take the time away from things here and having to travel to Silvermoon to turn their items in and to get paid.   I wonder if little Zippie will be up here too?  I like that little goblin because she is always so nice to me when I bring my herbs in for weighing and processing.

We may not have to journey to Silvermoon on business very often, however, that isn’t going to stop me from visiting home as much as I can because after spending as many years in Thunderbluff  that will always be my true home.

I have taken it upon myself to visit with Dawnglory and his woman, Romy, so that I can play with their little girl.  She is a bright and very intelligent little thing despite her smallness and being a Blood Elf. Little thing probably has more Tauren baby toys than most of her race, however, I know that Naton and Maha are constantly making her little things.  I am working on a pair of little shoes for her now that will look lovely, a lot of beadwork and embroidery which I am sure that her parents will recognize the meanings of them.   This is the first Elf baby that I have been able to spend as much time with and I will admit that I am enjoying it – if I can’t have grandchildren of my own, this little girl will at least be something that I can cherish.  She may not be able to understand everything that is being said to her, however, she is bright enough to where she knows when people truly love her.  Dawnglory has changed quite a bit from the man that we knew before since he became a Father and I will admit that I think it has made him a much better person for it – one little child has changed a lot of lives just by being born.

 

 

Mooma Cloudhoof

 

A Death Knight’s Rambling Thoughts…


May 8th

Dear Journal,

I will have to admit that things here in Halfhill have been a bit more lively since Mom and Nahai joined Maha and I at the farm.  Oh yes, they are looking into getting the farm adjacent to ours and will probably have that done before the end of the Summer.  I knew that Maha and I weren’t really expecting them to stay with us as long as they have so far, however, it is kind of enjoyable, breaks the monotony and keeps me constantly chuckling.

Naturally, I do have to accommodate the living when I am working at my forge because there are times that I will forget the hour when I am working on a nice piece of armor for someone.   There is almost something magical that happens when you are creating something and you kind of get lost in that activity – I know that I do and it does make the work less tedious.  At least I did get the forge moved from under the house, since that has been turned into the male living quarters and I don’t think that Nahai was all that appreciative of the noise or the heat sometimes, although, the kid never really complained. As long as I have been a smithy, I have always been able to lose myself in m work and sometimes it even always me to let my mind wander to those days when I wasn’t a Death Knight.

Some of my fonder memories are returning bits at a time or it could be that I am listening more intently to Mom when she talks about the “good old days” before everything went to pot.  My trade back in those days were those of a hunter, I didn’t take up the trade of blacksmithing until after I became what I am now.   I will admit that I miss those days of wandering throughout Kalimdor, hunting and fishing with my Father and with Mahamura.   We had some good times from what I’ve been told.   Now, I am the eldest Bull in the tribe of Cloudhoof, however, it will always be led by Mom until such time as she feels the need to step down and will probably appoint Nahai as our chieftain over our very small tribe.  I think we’re more the clan than tribe although some people would argue that point, we’re happy with whom we are and we’re accepted in Thunder Bluff.

Maha actually has a better memory of those times long ago than I do, it took me some time to find the family after my change and although I feel more welcomed now than I did when I first arrived, I know that there are some gaps in my memory of how we used to do things.   I know that Maha and Mom always preface a chat about the old days with the statement  of “Naton, do you remember when we did this?”  I think that they do grasp the idea that I am still trying to fit my past back together in some kind of semblance of order.

Oh, we did make it back for the Faire, however, we didn’t stay as long as we did the last time.   A full week of faire-going was enough to last for a while, maybe next month we’ll stay a week again.  I know that I had quite the line of little old Bessies lined up with pots and pans to be repaired.  Some of them I did quick fixes on and some I brought back to Pandaria with me to work on.  One in particular is a very large copper pot – can’t say that I have seen one this size for a long long time.   I guess it’s used to prepare large celebratory meals in the Bluff.  I know it has to be older than Mom.

Oh copper is a beautiful metal to work with and as it ages, it gets a veneer that it can only get through age.  However, on a pot, that’s not necessarily a good thing.  I can tell that it is getting very old by how thin it has become in some spots – I think that I can repair it without making it look too shabby, however, it will take some time.  Luckily for me, Tahfal is a good miner and has promised to get some good quality copper for me when he isn’t studying.  I know he will do it too because he’s just that way.

I did ask him how his studies were going this last trip and he just smiled and nodded his head a bit as he told there was so much more for him to learn how to be the best Light Walker that he can be.   One would have thought that his faith might have been a little shaken after all of these years of study, however, hit has seemed to deepen his beliefs.  I suppose that I will never know exactly everything that he does because the Light is truly not my friend, although, I do have some understanding of how it works.  Prior to becoming a Death Knight, I might have been able to follow his studies a bit more closely  than I can now.  At least I still have my faith in the Earth Mother and that has never truly failed me – there is always a reason that things turn out the way that they do.

Getting back to the Faire, I swear that if there was a real war going on, people might not be so friendly as they are at the Faire, however, it’s always a fun time.  I like to watch people, doesn’t matter the race or the faction.  I still get a chuckle out of the little gnomes running around, even the goblins can be real amusing.  I don’t think that I have seen a single goblin at the Faire that wasn’t trying to work some kind of deal or something to make money.  I did see a couple of the them – the Prattfalls – from Silvermoon  while we were there.  Poor Dooddah did have her hands full with Uncle Zednick because he was quite insistent that he wasn’t drunk even as he proceeded to run in to the same post by the food tent several times and kept excusing himself as if it were a living being.   It did make me laugh.

I didn’t see the Boss at the Faire this time, which is kind of unusual, however, Dooddah said that her sister had taken some time off and left the Boss to run the office and warehouse in Silvermoon.  Poor fellow never seems to catch a break from working.  I know that he has never shortchanged us on anything that we have done for the company and we keep getting some very well paying contracts from the company too.   I can’t say that I am overly fond of the archeology thing because it’s too much like mining for my tastes – although I can mine like a machine – however, with those delicate artifacts, they have to be handled with care and let’s be honest – Tauren have big feet and our hands aren’t exactly dinky either.  I’ve tried digging that stuff up a few times and I’ll admit that I smashed more than I collected.

Well, I suppose I ought to wrap this up – I don’t really sleep, however, it does feel good to lay down for a few hours to let the muscles relax.  You’d think that the Lich would have had a better plan than just making you dead – your body still gets tired and the muscles will ache sometimes.  I know that we were considerable disposable, that’s probably why they overlooked that part of making us the way that we are.

Naton Cloudhoof  – aka Sadheart

A Time Of Reflection…


April 22nd

Dear Journal,

Have you ever awakened from a deep slumber filled with such sadness that you wanted to weep, not truly understanding the reasoning behind it?  This morning was such a morning for me and I sat in my bed pondering many thoughts as to why I might feel this terrible sadness.  No, it was not a premonition of things to come, these feelings were buried deep and came from the past.

Rather than sit there wallowing in my own self-pity, I decided to get up and prepare breakfast while the others still slept.   I had brought several bags of pine nuts with me when I came to Pandaria since I knew that they were a favorite of my children and myself.  As I set about pounding the nuts into a nice coarse grain for their favorite pine nut mash, the thought came into my mind as to why I was so sad.

I was once married to a wonderful Bull and he was indeed the love of my life.  He had a kindness that made me feel that he cared for everything in the world even though he was a very skilled hunter.  I know that some of the other hunters used to make fun of him because he would always stop and make an offering to the Earth Mother  for the life taken.  He would always tell the Earth Mother that he took this life so that his people would live and the blessings of the Earth Mother had led him to this particular prey.

Oh, we had a happy and full life, my Bull and I.  We were able to enjoy life and live those days blissfully happy.  Before the children started arriving, we would go out  together into the wilds, he to hunt and me to gather my herbs.  We truly felt blessed by the Earth Mother and embraced each day as it arrived with such vigor that we were probably more blissfully happy than we even realized.

Our first born, Naton, was born in the Spring of the year and we were very proud parents.  He looked very much like his Father and had his strength – we also knew that he had a very healthy set of lungs to go with his bulk too because he would wake us up as well as the surrounding tents in the village when he wanted to be fed.   As he grew older, his Father took him out to teach him how to hunt and he became quite good  at this profession, very much like his Father, and he followed the traditions that his Father put before him.

Our second child arrive and she was a sweet little thing, much quieter than her older brother and not nearly as demanding.  Her name was Mahamura, after her grandmother.  She was one of those children that was always a bit shy in joining in to play with the other children, however, as she grew, she became a bit more self-assured and actually became one of the leaders of the gang of children that played in the village as their parents were out working.  She definitely showed a proficiency with the bow as a young girl, so, she too soon started going out with her brother and her Father to hunt in the wilds.

Our third child was definitely a gift from the Earth Mother.   His name was Nahai, naturally, he looked very much like his Father, however, his personality was more like my own. He was quiet, polite and showed the signs early on in following in his Mother’s footsteps of being a druid.  I can remember taking him with me when I would go out to gather herbs, he learned very quickly and was always excited to be out with me in the forests and plains, gathering herbs, learning how to grind them up so that we could use them for whatever we needed, be it potions, be it for inks – he always was a willing and helpful child.  I hate to admit it, however, I will say that of our three children, he was probably my favorite because he was more like myself and less daring than his Father.

Our fourth child, Tahfal, was one of those pleasant surprises that happen to couples that are intent on having a large family.  He was the darling of our group of children.  A bit smaller than the others at birth and seemed to be slow growing, however, he was more inclined to read a book rather than to go out and play with the others.  Oh, he had his rough and tumble side and his older siblings made sure that he was active because he was never allowed to sit alone for very long.  He was the one child that I had that always wanted to go and talk with the elders, the priests as if he were following some path that his Father and I couldn’t ascertain.  Time would later reveal where his true talents like.

Why am I sad?  It looked like I had everything a Bessie could want, a home, children and a loving husband.  We should have known that the Fates would draw a card for us that would bring it all crashing down one day, however, our faith in the Earth Mother was stronger.

We had lived through the assaults on Thunder Bluff by the Grimtotem and lived through all of the tragedies that had stuck our people.  We went through the trials and tribulations when the Grimtotem were driven from our tribe to form the nomadic group that they are today.   We lived through the death of our chieftain although that was indeed a terrible time for us.

It was this time of year that my husband and I decided that it was time for us to go out into the wilds together again as we had done prior to  the arrival of our brood.  It had been such a long time since we were able to slip away together like this and we were looking forward to it like two small children awaiting Winter Veil.

We left our children in the care of our neighbors and set out on our journey which we knew would be for several days.   We felt young and carefree again, no children to remind us of our responsibilities to hearth and home.   I think that in our jubilant mood is what made us get careless and less aware of the things that could actually harm us.

My first notice that things were amiss was when I was gathering my herbs, I knew my husband was nearby, I heard a loud clash and yells coming from the  direction that he was in.   I quickly donned my stealth cat mode and made for the sound of the noise.  There on the ground lay my poor husband, trussed up like some kind of animal and there were several Grimtotem warriors standing around congratulating themselves on such a fine catch.

I honestly didn’t know what I could do other than to try to get my husband untied before I was discovered.  I succeeded in getting some of his bonds released enough to where he should have been able to manage the rest when I was discovered.  Oh, discovered I was, and I fought back with all of my strength, fangs barred, claws ripping at anything that came in my direction as I stood close to where my husband was trying to get unbound.

Let me just say that we were captured.  It was a situation where I should have gone for help as quickly as possible instead of trying to rescue my husband alone, I know that now, and the guilt that has followed me all of these years is not any easier to bear.  In hindsight, there are so many other things that I should have done and didn’t see it at the time.

The Grimtotem were looking for slaves and my husband and I were put in with that group of other Tauren.  It was indeed a sad time.  To see my poor husband beaten almost on a daily basis because his pride would flare and he would try to withstand the indignities that were placed on him by our captures.  I know that I was trying to just survive, trying to find a way for us to escape, endured the hardships and the indignities that were placed on us – trying to find a way to get back to our tribe and our children.

We knew and we hoped that our tribe would send out people to look for us when we failed to make our return at the appointed time, however, that seemed as though it was years ago.  I know they must have looked for us, our children needed us.

A full year went by and my poor husband and I were still captives.  I was beginning to give up hope and I was beginning to think that this was what the Earth Mother had intended for us to live.  My faith was and is still strong, however, my heart was yearning to get back to my children.  My husband was growing weaker with each season that passed and I could see the fire in eyes starting to dwindle – all the hard work and the tortures that were forced upon this one proud hunter was almost more than I could bear.  I knew that one day, he would give up all hope and would become as some of the others had become – quiet, only doing what was ordered and living each day as if it were a sentence of some kind.

One day, I don’t know what happened exactly, I heard loud cries from the center of the village and I ran to see what was going on.  My poor husband had finally snapped and was attacking anyone that came near him, Grimtotem, other slaves, anyone that came with arms reach met a crushing blow and possibly death.  I screamed and ran towards him to see if I could bring him under control although I knew that the Grimtotem would probably kill him as punishment for his rebellion.

Our eyes met and I could see the pain in his eyes even as he took another’s life, he screamed at me to run.  Although I wanted to stay, I did as I was told and I ran as hard and as fast as I could out of the camp, hearing the noise grow louder as I sped away.  I knew then, my husband had done this to sacrifice himself so that I might be able to escape and get back to our family.

I know that I ran for days and it seemed like I was starting to get back into familiar territory – places that I had visited with my husband and other members of our tribe.  I did make it back home, knowing full well that my husband probably lay dead in the village of the Grimtotem.  Between my grief for my husband and the joy of seeing the Bluffs, I was definitely home again.

After several days of recovering from my own injuries and exhaustion, I was told that my eldest son had gone out to find us after the tribe had given up all hope.  He never returned  and a search party went out to look for him as well, however, they were unsuccessful.

The Grimtotem were known for the atrocities that they would visit upon our people after their banishment from our tribes in Mulgore.  One of the things that they had taken upon themselves to do was to sell some of their captives to the Lich King’s minions to be turned into Death Knights.

So, I had lost my husband and I had lost my eldest child.  My grief was horrific and my other children, try as they might, could not get me to come out of my deepest depression.   I know that I had stopped believing in the Earth Mother for a while, I lost touch with my inner feelings, everything that I had known and loved had been taken from me even though I had done all of the things that I thought would please the Earth Mother, she had allowed my husband and my son to be taken from me.   I was bitter and I am afraid that I was not good to my living children, although, they will say that they understand now, I can remember the looks on their faces sometimes when I would argue with them over such trivial things.  It was if I was punishing them for being alive.

Time passed and eventually, a young Bull returned to our village and I thought at first that it was an apparition of my husband – he looked so very much like him.  The young Bull was making inquiries about various things, he was searching for his family, his memory of his family was there, however, he was a Death Knight – a thing to be feared and one to look upon with pity.

I know that my youngest son, Tahfal, was one to go to the Story Circle that was a tradition in the Bluffs and he is actually the one that found his older brother, Naton.  You see,  Naton was now known as Sadheart – the young Death Knight that was asking questions about homes and families.   Naturally Tahfal brought the Death Knight home with him…I was both revolted and relieved to see my son again – I was happy to have my child back and did the thing of ignoring what he had become.

I think I can see why I awakened so sad today.  This was the time of year that I lost both my husband and my child – my child has come home to me, even if he truly is not the child that I gave birth too many years ago.  I can be grateful to the Earth Mother for what I have now, however, I will always mourn the loss of what was.

Mooma Cloudhoof

 

Laughter Is Good…


Aril 9th

Dear Journal,

Oh, it is so nice hearing laughter in our house at the farm and for that laughter to continue on when we go back to the Bluff.  It is so nice having the family almost totally together in Pandaria, however, Tahfal is the laggard in getting his studies done so that he can come with us to Halfhill.  I think that he will start hurrying things up in the near future because of the fact that he doesn’t like eating his own cooking.

Having Nahai and Mother with us in Halfhill is delightful, we’re always talking about home and laughing about the things that we did as children.  I know that it makes Mom sad sometimes because I think she still misses our Father after so many years, however, she is just enjoying her new life with us now.

Naton and I have decided that the house is a bit crowded at this point, however, it’s well worth it.  We’re planning on completing the forge area soon and then we can close in the place underneath the house a bit so that we can have more sleeping room.  Of course, Mom and  Nahai are already talking about buying the little farm near us, so, we may not have to go to all that trouble.   It’s just nice having them here with us and I don’t think that I have heard Naton laugh so much in a very long time.  He likes having the family together for the most part.

I understand where Naton is coming from when he tells me that he is living his life through our lives because he can see how we enjoy things and he can derive some pleasure from that.  I know that he sometimes wishes that he could have a wife and children of his own, however, with his condition, that would be impossible.  I think he would have made a wonderful Father and husband to some lucky Bessie.

I can remember how things were before Mom and Dad went missing and were kidnapped by the Grimtotem and Naton went looking for them.   He was one of the most eligible bachelors on the Bluff and the girls would go wild when he was there and attending one of the many events, however, that all changed once he became a Death Knight.  The kind hearted Bull is still there, buried underneath that outer shell though – he spends an awful lot of time making things at his forge for people without charging them, only because they need the items and they can’t pay for it right away or something.   I know that when we go home to visit, he is swamped by the old ladies with their pots and pans that they want him to repair for them.  I’ve watched him talk and play with the little ones that aren’t afraid of him and I know that I can see it in his face, he would love to have a family of his own.  Maybe someday he will find someone that will overlook what he is and love him as much as we do.

We’re actually in the Bluff right now and we’re going to take in the Faire.  It feels good to be home for a while, however, I will have to say that Nahai was reluctant to come back.  After some prodding from Naton and I, we found out why he didn’t want to come back.  Poor fellow thought that once he got back to the Bluff that he would be forced to stay and help out.  Well, with Mom being in Pandaria, I don’t think he needs to worry about that at all – she needs and wants him to go with her  to explore all of Pandaria.   I know I laugh when I see those two sillies riding the air waves in tandem and diving down over the valley gathering herbs – it does remind me of old times.

The only thing that bothers me about having Mom in Halfhill is the fact that she is already trying to do some matchmaking for me.  I keep telling her that I will find a mate some day and I will produce those grandchildren that she is always prattling about.  Right now, I’m just happy enjoying our life in Pandaria and doing the things that I want to do without any worries about home, hearth and children.  That day will come soon enough and when the time is right, I am sure that the Earth Mother will let me know.  Of course there are several young bulls that in the Valley that spark my interest, however, that’s as far as it goes right now.  I know that when I was younger, I would long for a home and family of my own, however, I have that now, minus the mate and children, in Halfhill and I am completely content with that.   Some day Mom will realize that I am just who I am and I can’t make things happen just because she wants things that way.

I brought my a gown to wear to the Faire this time so that I don’t have to wear my armor all of the time.  I think that there might be fun with the dancing and I’ll let the boys go out on their own and do their thing.  I just want to relax, enjoy the Faire.  I am sure that Mom will find some of her old cronies to talk with about how grand farming is in Pandaria – most of the old ladies that she knows haven’t gone there yet and I think that they will enjoy hearing about Mom’s daring adventures that she has already had in Pandaria.

I know I giggle when Mom and Nahai come home from some of their herb gathering with tales of what they have seen – it’s nice to see some of the places through their perspective.  Mom has definitely decided that the Hozen are not her favorite race so far in Pandaria – she got quite splattered by a few of them when she landed in the wrong place to gather some herbs that had caught her eye.

Oh well, I guess I should stop writing in my journal and start getting ready to attend the Faire, I see Naton and Tahfal kind of dancing around because they have challenged each other with the canon ride again.  How they keep doing that every time we go to the Faire is beyond me – silly boys.

Mahamura  Cloudhoof

 

Having More Fun…


March 5th

Dear Journal,

I am really in a state of shock to see Mom up here in Pandaria.  I never thought in a million years that she would have the nerve and/or courage to make the trek up here, however, there she sits on the front steps of the farm and just soaking in the sunshine. I know that Naton and Maha were surprised when I showed up unannounced, however, I would say that they are more than shocked to have Mom come up as well.  We never thought that she would leave the confines of Thunder Bluff long enough to really make the journey.  She’s been telling us for years that she is too old to go out adventuring, however, I guess that she changed her mind.

Now, my brother and sister have two tourists to contend with as well as two crazy druids.  Mom really likes the flying up here in Pandaria as much as I do, we can just catch the air and float for a long ways without being tired either.  I taught Mom how to swoop in when she sees an herb and she’s got the hang of it pretty well now – she did do a few snout smashes the first few times but nothing makes you learn faster than pain sometimes.

I think Mom and I both have fallen in love with the Jade Forest so far because of how green everything is and how many herbs we have been able to gather.  Of course, Mom is having more fun making new inks that she got the recipes for in the Vale and creating new glyphs and inscriptions.   She keeps telling me that she is old, however, when she keeps learning things, it makes her feel young and won’t let her mind drift away into senility like some her old friends had happen.  I can see her point, however, she acts like she has found some kind of amazing youth serum up here.

Oh, the embarrassing thing is that my Mom loves to hang out in the market in Halfhill just talking with people and I even caught her flirting with one of the Bulls up there.  That was embarrassing to see your Mom act like she had the intelligence of a gnat when she was trying to be girlish at the same time.  The Bull seemed to like her a lot and that has me worried now – what if?  Well, what if she decides that she likes someone up here and decides to hook-up?   Oh my, that really kind of makes me more than nervous and I can imagine that Naton and Maha would have a raging fit.  I suppose that I ought to think about it differently, however, it’s always been Mom and us – to add another adult into the mix would really make for some interesting times.

I hope that Tahfal isn’t too upset with being left alone in Thunder Bluff with the responsibility of taking care of the house and Mom’s garden.  I don’t think that she will stay here for a long time, however, I suppose if she goes back home, I should go with her to help out too.  I can’t have my baby brother thinking that he’s an orphan since we’ve all taken off like this.  He has his studies to keep him busy and I think that he will be fine for a while, however, I know how I felt when Maha left and then, shortly thereafter, Naton went too.   It was lonely and the Earth Mother knows that I have always been the real friendly one of the group.   I like people and I like to play pranks.

Mom says that we ought to help Naton and Maha more around the farm and we should be the ones that take the trips to Silvermoon now and again too, just so that Naton and Maha have some free time to get to know some more of the people up here.   Well, I can get where Mom is going with this too – the more people they know, the more people that we’ll get to know too – I like that part.

I saw a girl in the market the other day that I’d like to get to know a bit better too.  She had the most beautiful blue eyes and the way that she walked just had me mesmerized.  Sure, I might have met her a long time ago in Thunder Bluff because she looked real familiar.  I would have introduced myself to her there in the market but I was so busy staring at her that I fell over a bunch of barrels that were stacked next to one of the stalls – I didn’t think it too wise to introduce myself to someone after falling on my face and getting soaked with what I hope was beer – it smelled like some beer, however, it also smelled like something else.  Nothing like making a fool of myself, yeah!

Nahai Cloudhoof