It Does Get Lonely Waiting Behind…

October 11th

Dear Journal,

Ah yes, it’s been quite a while since I’ve last written, however, these are busy times and there are many things to occupy my time.  The one thing that seems to occupy my time more often than not is the pack.  It keeps growing and sometimes I wonder what I am doing with this many in my group.  Of course, I do depend on Felley quite a bit to help me out sometimes, however, she has her hands full as well because she has decided to go out adventuring on her own a bit more these days.

There are times that I would be more than willing to put all of this aside and go off adventuring with her.  We’ve been together for quite a while and I will admit that I wouldn’t change a single thing about our time together with the exception of the fact that I would like to make our relationship a bit more formal, however, I don’t think that she would go along with that right now.

Felley knows that I still think about my wife and children that I lost in Gilneas, however, after the last year or so, I’ve actually stopped looking for them.  It was extremely difficult for me to give up on my old life, however, the logic of the situation finally registered fully on my mind.  There isn’t a chance that my family survived the fall of our homeland and it’s rather doubtful that they survived the Curse even if it did befall them.  Not everyone can adapt to that big change in their lives with their sanity intact.  I know this from my experience with some of the people that I have gotten to know since my arrival in Darnassus.

We did try to make the transition over to Stormwind for a short time, however, it was one of those things that just wasn’t meant to be due to the fact that some of the members of the pack couldn’t’ adapt to the city life without causing undo problems.   Rather than break the pack up and leave some of the youngsters behind, Felley and I, decided to bring the group back to Darnassus and to Dark Shore.  At least here people can kind of expect some of the social accidents that will happen with a young wolf, be they female or male – we all have our problems.  Sometimes the younger males will want to try to challenge my patience with the pack, however, that is usually short-lived and they have the choice of staying with the pack under my leadership and they can move on to another pack and try their luck there.  I know that Felley and I coddle some of our youngsters, however, they are the only children that we will ever have.

I do know that I haven’t seen or heard of anyone of our kind having children of our own since the Curse.  Maybe that ability to propagate has been taken away from us along with the Curse, no one really knows and it isn’t something that we discuss with one another.   There are a few people here from Gilneas that were not affected by the Curse but they are indeed a rarity and I will admit that there are times that I am somewhat envious of them having new families here in this land.  If only we hadn’t allowed ourselves to be cut off from the rest of society for so long that we lost touch with the reality of the situation of the lands and factions.

Oh well, all of that is hindsight and you know what they say about that.  I will have to admit that I have learned an awful lot from my mate in the last year.  I can read and cipher as well as she can even though I don’t have the formal education that her family afforded her before the changes happened.

From all of the rumors that seem to be floating around Darnassus, it does appear as though we’re in for some new and exciting changes as well as an opportunity to engage in some adventures with some of the old foes.  It may be rumor, however, not one to hide from adversity, I think that I will have my little pack ready for whatever may be looming on the horizon.

I hope that Felley will make her way back home before too much longer, I know that I miss her more than anyone could even fathom.  I guess I have let go of my past and I am looking forward to embracing the future if it’s not too late.  Who knows, she may have found another in her adventures to some of these distant places although I will have to admit that her letters are as warm as ever, they still aren’t quite the same as having her here with me.






A Matter of Give and Take…

April 27th

Dear Journal,

I will have to admit that I am still very angry with Kal.  He promised me faithfully that he would not get into any more predicaments when he went to Stormwind and he lied.  Not only did he lie, he just ignored the fact that he had made the promise – he never said that, exactly, however, he did look terrible when he got home the other morning.  Yes, it was morning again, not the same day that he had left either.  It was supposed to be a quick trip and back to Halfhill – however, it turned into one of those two day events with a sleepover in Stormwind.

I know that he is used to living his own way, however, that wasn’t the plan when I left the Sentinels.  I was going to work with him and help make money and work on the farm with him as well.  Now, it seems I get left behind at the farm and off he goes adventuring in Stormwind.  I am not sure that I care for some of his friends, although, they seemed to tolerate my presence the last time I saw any of them while I was still in the Sentinels.

It’s not like he forced me to leave the Sentinels, I did it for myself and for him.  He no longer wanted to be a Scout and I didn’t feel comfortable going out in the field for days at a time learning him at home, maybe I should have just stayed with the Sentinels because now I am the one that is being left behind in Halfhill.

I truly gave up the only life that I have known to be with him because I love him beyond reason, which, may be a bit one sided.  He says that he loves me, however, his actions her lately are not showing that to me that much.  He’s all apologetic and he is constantly giving me gifts, however, I need to sit him down and tell him that he can’t buy my forgiveness nor can he buy my love with money and gifts.  That’s not how that works or that’s how I feel.

When he got home the other morning, I was so angry at his appearance and his extended absence that I just walked out of the house.  I know that I didn’t even ask him if he was okay.  His armor looked a mess, he had burn marks on his arms and a few places on his ears, however, I wasn’t going to ask him what happened.  All I know is that he went to Stormwind and was supposed to pick up more contracts from Magdamia and come back after he had gotten paid for the stock and contracts we had completed.

I haven’t been home in almost a week now and I know that he is looking for me, however, I know Pandaria almost as well as he does, so, I know how to stay out of sight as much as possible.  I just need some time to think things over and decide what it is that I want to do.  Do I want to stay in this relationship that seems to have gone eschew and a bit one sided or do I want to go back to the Sentinels and try to put this behind me?

It just breaks my heart to think that I have given almost everything up to be with the man that I love and he is just wild and crazy.  I never saw this side of him when he was my Scout and we were living together even though we both had our duties to attend too.   I know that now that he doesn’t have to follow the discipline of the Sentinels, he’s kind of gone off the deep end a little bit with his independence.

I know we’re both young and we should take our time, however, I do think that he and I need to sit down and talk about a few things.  I can’t stand this constant evasion of telling me beforehand that he is going to meet his friends in Stormwind and he might be gone longer than what we had planned initially.  I am tired of worrying about him and tired of the fact that I get left behind  most of the time.  Yes, I love the farm and I love the house that we have built together, however, I wasn’t planning on being there alone.

Maybe this comes from his mix-breeding, I don’t know and I doubt that this is something that I can talk to his Mother about.  I need to talk to someone and see how they think I should feel about the whole thing.  I know that I will probably go talk to some of the girls back at the camp although I am loathe to do that because they will gossip about how Kal and I aren’t getting along or something.   Maybe I can talk to one of the Pandaren monks and see what he or she  advises  or just maybe go back to Darnassus and seek counsel with the priests and pray to Elune for a while.

I’m not going to let Kal know where I am right now, let him think about the things that have happened and he needs to make a few choices and adjustments, I can’t be the only one doing that.



Mach 15th

Dear Journal,

I am a little bit upset with Kae getting in touch with my Mother about my behavior.  It’s like getting double-teamed by  a couple of females.  It’s not fair and it’s definitely not fair when one is your Mom and the other is your girlfriend.

It’s been a long time since I’ve had a talking too by my Mom, it’s been years in fact.  Now, I’ll admit that I like to drink and I like to rough house with my friends and I am not used to someone that is going to get their nose out of joint when I do either of the above.  I just know that I am not a little boy and I did politely explain that to my Mom, although I don’t think that she heard that part.

She’s just upset with the way that Vashlan is acting lately and I do find it kind of surprising, however, I think that he will settle back down once the novelty wears off and he finally grows up enough to where he realizes that things aren’t that great if that’s all you do.  Mom is worried about him neglecting his studies and I’ll admit that that could be a problem, so, I’ll have a few passing words with him when I am in Stormwind in a few days.

Kae acted as if everything was okay between us when I got back this last time, all banged up and somewhat injured, however, I didn’t know that it bothered her enough to send a letter to my Mom like someone being a tattletale.  Well, she and I have had a discussion on the matter and I think that I made it real clear that she doesn’t have the right to contact my Mother in regard to my behavior.  If she has a problem with me, she needs to talk to me about it before she starts wailing at the moon like some spoiled little girl.  I don’t need for my Mother to know about or be involved with the things that I do because I am a grown man, the last time I checked.  Sure, I’m still a young man, however, I’m considered capable of taking care of myself quite nicely.

Let’s just say that Kae stormed out of the house and I didn’t see her for a couple of days.  I thought that she had left me and had gone back to her Sentinels again.  Well, she did go back there and found out why she left in the first place and they didn’t exactly welcome her back with open arms as she had anticipated that they would.  She didn’t sign up or anything, she just offered to help out where needed.  She got stuck with training some of the newer people that had join the ranks and I guess she was really not pleased with that, especially showing them how to dig new latrines and covering the holes from the old ones.

She came back and we argued some more and finally got to the point that we would agree not to talk about it again until both of our tempers had cooled.

Women!  You can’t live with them and you can’t live without them!  I know that I have a tough time trying to figure out the moods that my beloved Sentinel can get into and to add my Mother to the mix is just not a fair thing to do to a man.  My mind was just spinning with all of the do’s and do not’s that I just ended up shutting down and trying to ignore my head for a while.  If I didn’t love both of them, I would have just packed up my things and traveled on to someplace else, until it hit me that this is my farm and I built it before either one of them ever saw it.  No, I wouldn’t be the one leaving, however, nothing of that sort happened.

I just find it odd that women, or the ones that I have known, are all lovey dovey when you’re courting them and then, after they feel more secure in the relationship, they get all weird.   I know that Kae and I have had some arguments or disagreements in the past and some of them have gotten to be rather heated, however, we always did the kiss and make up thing before we went to bed together.  Women do have some strange moods and emotions sometimes and I always wonder if these things will settle down as they get older if it is something that a fellow just has to deal with indefinitely.

I wish my Dad was here in Pandaria instead of Silvermoon because he has had much more experience with this sort of thing than I have and maybe he could give me some pointers on how to stay out of trouble. Or at least stay out of the sights of my loved one when she is in a snit.   I’m sure that female Sindorei and female Kaldorei are similar in their emotional makeup, although, I think that the Sindorei girls might be more excitable.  I just don’t know.   I could ask Dawnglory, I suppose, although he has mellowed out quite a bit since he got involved with his woman and they had their baby – I’m sure he still remembers the days when he ran around like a crazy man.

Maybe I should just keep to myself on this and figure it out on my own for a while.  I know that it’s almost embarrassing to admit that you don’t understand the woman that you are with.  I do think that I love her and that one day we will be mated and take our vows, however, I’m not quite ready for that kind of commitment just yet.   I wonder if she would have so readily run to my Mom with the problems that we were having if we were mated or is it because we’re not?  I don’t know, I guess I should give this whole thing a lot more thought.

Kaldor Shadowmoon 

A Worried Mind…

*Some very blunt language and swearing – if you’re easily offended by that sort of thing, please don’t read it.*


February 13th

Yo Book!!

Oh, I’m having a real restless night tonight and it’s actually a little before dawn, if I look out the window, I can see the sky changing from dark to light. Mirri and Romy are still asleep, which is a good thing because I need to find some time to get my head sorted out a little bit.  I wish I could say that it’s the war or business, however, it’s not, it’s personal.

I keep trying to build up the nerve to talk to Romy about getting married.  I know how we both felt about the whole thing to begin with, however, we have the baby to think about and how it will affect her in the long run if we still aren’t married.  I want what is best for the baby and any other children that we may have in the future, I don’t want people casting aspersions on them because of the fact that their parents aren’t properly wed in the Sindorei fashion.  I know that it would be extremely hard on Mirri when she goes to Silvermoon, those people wouldn’t understand the fact that her parents didn’t need a piece of paper to keep them together, she wouldn’t have any kind of proper family lines to speak of either.  I do know that Romy comes from a very good family in Silvermoon, while I, well, let’s just say that my parentage got lost in the shuffle at the orphanage in Shattrath.  Felessa and I could both be bastards for all we know, the matrons made up our surname.

I think that I am afraid that if I ask Romy to marry me, she will take off like a rocket and go back to Northrend with the baby – that would fucking kill me.  I don’t know how in the hell I would be able to carry on with my life if they weren’t with me.  I guess that I’ll just have to hope and pray that she will agree to it. I already have a ring to give her, if the answer is yes – I actually bought it right after Mirri was born and have kept it hidden away.  Yes, the thought had already come to my mind even then, I didn’t want Mirri to go through what I’ve gone through.  The only family that I have ever known has been the Morningstar family and they have made my sister and I feel very much a part of that.

I know that I was very upset with the note that Zippie sent me from Silvermoon, however, I suspected that Fae hadn’t changed much or at all from the way that she had that calculating look on her face when she was being introduced to Romy.  I know that I welcomed Faendra back at the Faire and gave her a brotherly hug that she turned into her pressing her body against mine and grabbing my fucking crotch.  I don’t think that Romy saw it or if she did, she hasn’t said anything about it.

Getting that note from Zippie opened all kinds of doors in my mind that I thought that I had closed permanently.  Then, today, I got a letter from Faendra that did more than rock my world a little bit.  She had all kinds of things to say about Romy and she was going to get me back for betraying “our” love.  Oh hello there?   The girl is definitely out of her mind and it does have me a bit unnerved to say the least.

I think that I am going to talk to Fnor when he gets back from his trip and explain to him about what is going on with Faendra.  I almost burned her letter in fear that Romy might find it and think all manner of things about me, however, I am going to keep it and show it to her brother.  This whole obsession with me has got to stop because not only is it going to ruin her life, it’s going to ruin mine too.  Fuck!! How did this get so screwed up, did I do something that has encouraged her to think that I might have some kind of romantic interest in her?  I fucking don’t know at this point.  I just know that it has to stop and I don’t want to distance myself from all of the Morningstars, just Fae.  I don’t think that I will ever be able to completely figure women out, they can be such a total fucking enigma.

I knew something was going to come along and fuck things up for us.  It was just meant to happen, the Fates get jealous if we’re too happy.  I have been ecstatic since Mirri has been born and Romy was okay after the birth. I don’t think that I have ever been this happy in my life, now, I have this little girl that is going to try to destroy everything because she thinks that she is in love with m.

I really think I need to sit down with Romy and tell her exactly what is going on and maybe drop down on one knee and propose.

My mind feels like it is totally scrambled today and it just keep fucking circling back to the problem at hand.  No, I am not going to let this girl destroy my happiness with my family.

Fnar Dawnglory

Owner of Plantation

Halfhill, Pandaria


Visiting Stormwind…

February 9th

Dear Journal,

I know that I should have done this long ago and I am happy that I did.  I finally convinced Kae that she should start going with me to places like Stormwind and even Iron Forge.  So, yesterday, we got busy, got all of the chores done that we had planned for the day and took off for Stormwind, which is where we still are this morning.

Oh, I forgot to mention that I saw Dawnglory and his woman in the market the other day and they had their baby, it sure was cute even if it is a Blood Elf baby, they look so tiny in comparison to what we Kaldorei have.  Yes, we’re a sturdy breed and the babies we have reflect that too. Well, I’m part Sindorei, so, I suppose I could sire a throw-back too and my children could be small in comparison to the regular babies.  Oh well, I’m not going to worry about that right because I don’t foresee that I’ll be having any children for a while yet, life is too busy. We really couldn’t talk in the market, for obvious reasons, the war may be winding down here in Pandaria, however, it isn’t that way back in Kalimdor.  Prying eyes and wagging tongues could cause trouble for the both of us.

However, I did get to talk with him at the fence that divides our property here in Halfhill and found out all kinds of things.  I guess that my Aunt Fae is back and living in Silvermoon, I know that is probably both a good thing and bad thing for my Father, one less thing for him to worry about or maybe not.  She’s always been kind of weird to me anyway because of my heritage, however, she’s never made the mistake of being outright rude or mean to me, she has been to my younger brothers until my Dad took her off to the side and read her the Articles of War – in the family that is pretty serious because that means you’ve pissed the old man off. I guess Mom and Dad are still in Nagrand doing whatever it is they do, hope I don’t have another little brother or sister on the way, however, Dad is still pretty virile even at his age.

We talked about the business being set up in Shattrath and I guess Dawnglory is planning on staying here in Pandaria most of the time and especially after the birth of his daughter.  Can’t say that I blame him for that either because if I have children in the future, I fully intend on raising them up here too. Well, if Kae is the woman that I have children with, it won’t be an issue.

We were laughing about the fact that Kae is just locking herself away here at the farm and he told me that I really needed to take her on date, not just to the Faire, take her some place nice to eat and maybe do some socializing with some of our friends.  He told me that he thought that we lived like hermits and that wasn’t a good thing for any relationship.  He’s right and I have been thinking that I needed to get Kae out of here for a while, maybe even take her to some of the places that I have been – see the world a bit.  Maybe even take her to Dalaran, even though it’s way different now from when I lived there.  We could go out to eat, drink some wine and maybe visit some of the places in Northrend.  That’s a plan for the future. Right now, the plan is to get her to Stormwind, visit with some friends, go out to eat and stay overnight at the apartment.

We made it to the story event behind the Cathedral that I attended once before and I think that we both had a great time.  Kae said that she really enjoyed the stories and would like to go again, which I think can be arranged because I enjoy it too.  I did see some of my friends, however, they seemed to be pretty occupied with other things, so, we didn’t get to talk to them.  I definitely assured Kae that they weren’t avoiding us, they were just involved in something that we weren’t a part of, so, we’ll try to catch up with them again sometime.

We went over to the Pig and Whistle and had some food and drank a bit.  I think we both were just enjoying hearing some of the gossip of Stormwind.  I know a few things caused us both to laugh out loud and I even blushed a couple of times.   Well, to hear a Dwarf talking about their love life so openly was more than funny because he was definitely in his cups and was telling the world that his lover was a hooker and his girlfriend was ugly as a fence post.

When we got back to the apartment, Vashlan was actually there and was sitting in the great room with other clothes on than a robe, that was a shocker. We sat and talked with him a while because he was in a sociable mood for once.  I could tell that he had been drinking and I could also tell that he had been with a woman too, those tell tale marks on his neck were a bit obvious. Yes, he’s definitely no virgin from what I could see and it looked to me like the marks were bites like I get from Kae now and again – Kaldorei woman.

Kae excused herself to go take a bath, so, the two brothers sat there and had a man-to-man talk.  The first talk of that nature I’ve ever had with him.  Yes, he had been with a woman and he said that it was the most remarkable experience that he had ever had in his life, he didn’t know that women did those things.  So, we talked about that as well as some things that he needed to be aware of. I think Mom and Dad would be real upset if they became grandparents by accident.

I think that I embarrassed him a bit but I also hope that he was listening.  Sounds like the girl is quite a handful and a Sentinel that was on leave here in Stormwind for a while.  I started laughing when he told me that she had done all kinds of things to him at the Inn and had just worn him out.  Well, I do wish that he had had a more romantic setting for his first time, however, he seemed to be rather pleased with himself and plans on seeing her again.  He didn’t tell me her name, however, it sounds like she might be a tad bit older than he is and didn’t mind the fact that he wasn’t purebred.

I swear that this was the first time that Vash hasn’t had his nose in a book when I was in town or not planning to go back to the tower to study some more.  It was nice talking to him and I’ll admit that he is definitely growing up. He says that his magic is coming along and that he is still ahead of the other students that are studying with him, so, I guess that’s good.  He laughed when I asked him if he had set any curtains on fire or sheeped anyone lately.  Oh, those were good times in Dalaran.  He said he’s still having a little bit of trouble socializing with some of the people here in Stormwind and I told him that that was normal, not all people are going to be educated and polite anywhere he goes.

I know that when I woke up this morning, I was feeling pretty happy and contented with my lot in life especially after I stared at Kae’s sleeping form for a little while.  Yes, I’m a lucky man and I hope that things will stay as good for the two of us as they are now. It has indeed been a wondrous thing for us since Kae left the Sentinels because we don’t have to worry about the interference that was going on after I left.  No Commander asking embarrassing questions about what I was doing and no other Sentinels trying to force their attentions on either one of us.  They are definitely a horny group of people. It’s just nice having complete control over our lives now, well, with Elune’s help, I’m sure.

I think that I’ll see if Kae wants to go to Dolonaar to see my grandparents any my little half-brothers because she hasn’t met them and I think that it’s time that she did.  I know that my grandparents will like her a lot and they might even remember her as being one of their foster children years ago.  She vaguely remembers them, however, I’m sure there have been many more kids that stayed with them. Oh that was long before she was old enough to become a Sentinel and she has her tattoos now that might throw them off a bit.  I think it would be fun anyway.  I’ll have to ask her when she wakes up because she may just want to go back home to Halfhill.  We’ll do whatever she wants.

Kaldor Shadowmoon 

Lost & Found…

Written in very cursive script denoting the maturity and education of the author

January 11th

Dear Journal,

I will admit that I definitely feel more relaxed right now than I have in months.  I knew that I had had things nagging at me in the back of my mind but I had done rather well in compartmentalizing them to where I hardly knew they were there except for a few times when they would push their way to the forefront. Business is hectic and my personal life is still pretty lonely since we haven’t gotten everything moved to Shattrath just yet, almost done with that, however, it does seem to be taking forever this time.

I had taken some time away from Silvermoon again and was just kind of kicking back on my front steps at the farm in Halfhill when I saw my good friend making his way across the fields.  Oh, his destination wasn’t even in question in my mind.  I did have to laugh at him though because with as much time as he has been spending in the sun, his skin is rather dark and that blonde hair of his has gone almost white.  Dawnglory is always going to be one those men that is going to age gracefully and those looks of his don’t appear to be fading either.

We sat on the steps and talked about our farms and how things were going with the business and how things were going back home.  I think that we are both spoiled with the ability of being able to run away now and again and take refuge here in Pandaria.  I know there are times that I can feel myself on the verge of losing my temper completely sometimes when I am in Silvermoon, not through anything that my staff has done, just from being around some of the people where you have to do the social mincing of words and the polished politeness that has as much sincerity as a broken doorknob.

I guess that Romy, Dawnglory’s woman, is getting quite large with their child and Dawnglory is definitely looking forward to the day when the little thing arrives and they can resume some of their activities again.  I can remember all too well the weeks prior to the birth of a child where you felt like you were on a desert isle somewhere and definitely very much alone.  I know it can’t be all that comfortable for the female either because she has all of that extra weight, not to mention, a very active baby running around inside.

I don’t know how the subject came up but it did and we acted on it.  I hadn’t been to the Faire in months and I knew that Dawnglory and Romy hadn’t been either.  We have all been pretty busy, him meeting all of Romy’s family and me with the business.  So, Dawnglory hot-footed it back to his house to see if Romy felt like going to the Faire and roaming around a bit.  I know that I love being here at the farm but it can get to be rather old if that is all you’re doing.  I know that Dawnglory hasn’t left his farm much during the last few weeks for fear that Romy would go into labor and he wouldn’t be around for the birth.

Naturally, we did check with the healer before we left because I knew that I didn’t want to go through the experience of delivering a baby while we were gone.  I have delivered one of my own sons, however, I don’t think that it was the most pleasant experience that Amyn has ever had giving birth.  I know that I was scared to death and promptly passed out once the child was delivered and the healer had arrived. A man can be brave in battle, brave in the face of danger, however, I don’t know too many men that can handle delivering a baby without feeling like they are on the losing end of a battleground.

We arrived at the Faire in good time and I will admit that I felt a bit awkward being there with the two lovebirds and not having Amyn on my arm.  Oh well, it was fun and I think that we all enjoyed the games that we could play as well as some of the food.  We were sitting there eating, yet again, and I happened to glance around and saw someone that I recognized.  I know that my heart skipped more than a few beats before I could get off my backside and chase the woman down.  It was my sister, Faendra.  I know that she was very shocked to see me and burst into tears as she threw herself into my arms.

We hadn’t parted on good terms the last time that I saw her and she had run away from Orgrimmar before the siege had started.  I have had the employees out looking for her whenever they had an opportunity, however, they weren’t having much luck.  She had written to me once and I was unable to track the letter back to the source because it had been passed through quite a few hands before it was finally delivered to me in Silvermoon – it had even made the trek to Pandaria.

I think that we were all surprised to see one another at the Faire.  Maybe it was Fate, maybe it was something else entirely, however, I was very happy to see her.  I was a little bit surprised at her reaction to seeing Dawnglory with his very pregnant woman, however, it was a cordial greeting between the two women even if it was a bit awkward.

I think that Faendra has grown up quite a bit since she left Orgrimmar in a snit. She’s a lot thinner and I will admit that she looks very tired.  I know that we all sat and talked for quite a while before the subject came up about Fae’s returning to Silvermoon or even Thunderbluff with us.  She acted a bit strange about it but at the same time, I could see the relief in her eyes.  I think the poor girl really has been starving for a while too.  I never knew that she could eat as much as she did sitting there at the table. We opted to go to Thunderbluff since Dawnglory still has his little camp there.

At least this is one worry that I can take off my list of things.  I don’t know if she is going to stay with us or what her plans are.  I know that I was just relieved to see her again and that she seemed to be okay.  Of course, she and I will have to sit down and have a nice long discussion about some of the things that happened prior to her running away and things that have changed since she has been gone.  I do know that I am going to let her make her own decisions as to what she wants to do because I think that was part of the problem between us before – I was trying to shelter her and protect her from things that she needed to experience on her own.  I just felt like it was my responsibility as her older brother to make sure that she had everything she needed or wanted, just to help make up for the loss of our parents.

At least I don’t have to worry about her being out there in the wilderness alone and thinking about all of the things that could have happened to her.  Naturally, we haven’t had a chance to talk yet, however, I am going to make it a point to let her direct the conversation, no matter how curious or unpleasant some of the topics may be.  I still feel guilty that I didn’t go out looking for her, however, at the time I think that we both needed that space to let our hurt feelings heal and to let my temper cool down quite a bit.  We had exchanged some rather hurtful things in our last verbal exchange and she was none too pleased with the marriage plans that I had made for her in Silvermoon.  She was still very much enamored of Dawnglory at that point – let’s hope that that has subsided and she has faced the reality of her situation in that area.   I suppose that we will have to discuss some of the changes that have happened in Silvermoon – how the marriage I had arranged for her had been cancelled and the groom is happily married to another young lady.  I don’t think that I will even bring up the cost of her dowry either because that is just something that I will have to deal as time goes on.  With her reputation being in tatters, there will be no Silvermoon marriages that I can afford to arrange for her.  Maybe she found another young man in her travels that she cares for?  We really haven’t had much of a chance to talk and there are many questions that I would like to have answered.  Naturally, she is going to have to rebuild her own social bridges with Zippie and the rest of the employees because she did leave things in the wrong light when she left.

At least we’ve decided to spend some time in Thunderbluff and we can relax a little bit before we start back on our work schedules.  I’m sure that Romy and Dawnglory want to get back to their farm in Halfhill to await the birth of their child.  They are both adamant that they want their child to be born in Pandaria.  I can understand that to some extent, however, it is still a bit of a trip.

The news that we have been able to uncover in Thunderbluff in regard to that idiot in Orgrimmar hasn’t been all that great and I am beginning to wonder if it is ever going to end. I know that if things ended tomorrow that it wouldn’t affect the business at all because you always need supplies for troops even when the conflict is cooling down.  I’m sure that everyone will be happy when we can get our lives back in order and we can have some peace in our lives.  I honestly can’t recall ever having extended years of peace except for when we were in Shattrath initially.

I suppose that I should go ahead and get a letter written to Amyn to let her know that my wandering sister has surfaced again.  I’m not quite sure how she is going to react to that news because she was very upset with the Fae left and almost tore the family completely apart.

Fnor Morningstar


Not Such A Nice Guy Sometimes…

October 11th

Dear Journal,

I am sitting here at the farm in Halfhill, just enjoying the quiet of the predawn hours.  Watching the fog as it whirls over the fields before the sun chases them away.  I’m also sitting here with a grin on my face and a chuckle that threatens to erupt at any moment.

Kae and I hadn’t been to the Faire in quite some time because there just hasn’t been a free moment to make that escape.  Oh, I’ve slipped back into Stormwind a time or two without her, however, we haven’t been to the Faire together.  Well, we decided that we would take in the Faire this time because I think we both needed a break from everything that we have been doing.

We arrived in Stormwind and it was its usual hustle and bustle of people rushing hither and yon, not really accomplishing a whole lot but they sure do act like they feel busy.  We dropped off our latest completed contracts and got our payment and picked up some more contracts from Maggie.  She was doing her usual tsk-tsk about the employees and how she has to keep an eye on things all of the time.  One would think it would be easier since Mother is there or in Stormwind a great deal of the time since she left Pandaria.

We did get a chance to sit and talk with Mom for a little and I think that did Kae a world of good because I think that her discussing her feelings about leaving the Sentinels and going into the freelance business with me was somewhat resolved.  I don’t think that it’s a mistake and I guess Mother told her right up front that she was putting too much pressure on me to make her an honest woman and would drive me away if she wasn’t careful.  I’m not sure that set real well with Kae but I think it helped her make up her mind.  It isn’t like I ever said that she had to make a choice between the Sentinels and myself either.  It has to be her choice and I am not going to pressure her although I do think that with Mom talking to her in a less than diplomatic manner probably helped her see the Light or at least Elune may have given her a swift kick in the backside or something.

Anyway, I think that we will be handing in our resignations before the end of the month and start living the life that I wanted to have all along.  Of course, Kae isn’t really resigning as such, she’s taking a leave of absence.  I guess you never resign from them, you can take leaves that can last for as long as you need it too, if it’s approved.  Now, I hope that it is approved or we may have to come to a parting of the ways for a while because I am already making arrangements to start working full time for the company again and Kae will have to work on her own problems.  It’s not that I don’t care, it’s just that I am tired of the Sentinels and the treatment that they sometimes give the male counterparts that act as scouts for them. 

I know that our patrols lately have been rather boring and the only thing that we do is keep an eye out for troop buildups and try to see what we can.  We’re not running into many Rangers these days and the only thing that we have seen are some of the Orcs wandering around rather aimlessly.  Seems Garrosh has trod upon his own people a bit more than they wanted too.  I know that I have always thought the Horde were always volatile and very unpredictable, however, with the different factions within the group have really kind of ripped the heart out of them.   Even the Orcs seem a bit lost in Pandaria right now.  I guess unless you’re a part of the upper echelon of Garrosh’s troops, you’re expendable and that isn’t sitting all that well with the grunts so very far away from their homes and families. I know that how I would feel if my leader turned out to be a nutcase and had sold everyone down the river for his own selfish gains.  We’ve had a few skirmishes every now and again, however, they aren’t anything like they were a few months ago, time has taken its toll and I would say that this “war” has kind of burned itself out or just fizzled – more fizzle than fire.

Well, what I am grinning about is that we went to the Faire, Mom is going to take our grandparents and the little guys there in the next couple of days, so, it was just Kae and I alone.  We had a great time and I will have to admit that I felt more relaxed than I have in months.   I know that we both drank way too much and probably ate way too much of the greasy food that you can only find at the Faire that has that flavor to it – almost makes you wonder what they really put in it.

We played the games, drank, ate and strolled around watching all of the different people.  We both like to watch people anyway, however, it did seem as though there was  lighter air at the Faire than usual.  There wasn’t a subtle hint of stress and animosity towards some of the people like you normally see.  I think that there were more children at the Faire this time and it was fun watching some of the families trying to keep the kids in check.

I have always loved the cannon ball ride and Kae has always been real hesitant about going on it as many times as I do, however, this time she had had enough to drink that she decided to go on it as many times as I did and try to beat me at the game.  Things were going along really great, however, I think that Kae was starting to feel the Darkmoon Reserve a bit more than I was and she had a bit of an accident. 

Sure, we’re used to getting soaking wet and having to trudge back up to the ride to catch another shot at the target, however, I think Kae misjudged her target this time.  She never even made it to the water, she landed with this awful thud in the sand and just kind of lay there with this dazed look in her eyes.  I thought for sure that she had hurt herself really bad and I was scared to death.  She just kind of lay there with this strange look on her face and I thought that she had broken her back or worse.  Naturally, I went off the deep-end a little bit and got a healer down to the beach by screaming at the top of my lungs and probably causing more notice of the situation than Kae would’ve liked.  Other than being drunk, Kae only got some bad bruises on her backside and probably some traumatic damage to her pride.

What I am giggling about is that there is bruising and then there’s bruising – Kae’s bruising covers her whole backside and she says that she doesn’t’ think she will ever be able to walk right again, not to mention, she wasn’t in the mood for any adventures under the furs.  I know I had a slight hangover when I got up this morning, however, I think that Kae is going to be in worse shape than I am because I wasn’t drinking as much as she thought I was, I was kind of egging her on.  She always thinks that she can go drink for drink with me and forgets that I learned how to drink with the dwarves in Ironforge.

Oh, I know I’m not being nice about laughing about someone else’s discomfort, however, it is funny.  Kae will have to admit one of these days that even a Sentinel can get their pride dinged every once in a while and it is funny.  We do like to compete with one another sometimes and I think this time that I actually kind of proved my point – hope she realizes that there was a point.  I’m bigger than she is, stronger than she is most of the time, and I can definitely drink more than she can.

I really had wanted to stay in Stormwind for a while to see my grandparents and my little brothers, however, Kae just wanted to come home to the farm.  I know the mood she can get in sometimes and I didn’t want to have my Mom see that side of her right now, especially after the conversation they had had before we went to the Faire. I had kind of halfway wanted to stop by the watch shop to see Josie and introduce her to Kae too, however, that may not be such a good idea.

Oh my, someone woke up cranky this morning.  Not to mention, the eggs and bacon probably don’t look that appetizing to her with a hangover.  I will have to admit that I haven’t seen her with a hangover like this and I’m sure my chuckles haven’t helped her.  Luckily I had some Darkmoon Reserve stashed away and put some in her coffee – the hair of the dog thing, you know.

She’s mumbling about never taking another drink and mumbling about never going on the canon ride again.