The Prattfalls

The way that the goblins live in Orgrimmar and the rest of Azeroth as seen through their eyes.

by

Never A Dull Moment…


June 13th

Dear Journal,

I have such a headache and I wish Zippie would stop yelling at me this morning.  She’s mad because she gave Tymer and I some contracts to complete, which we did, however, we also went to Faire.  We were in the area and we both thought that we deserved some time off and time to have a little bit of fun.

We were smart enough to put everything that we had collected in the bank before going to the Faire because you never know if some rogue is going to pinch your money or other valuables.  Yep, rogues steal from just about anyone they think they can get away with it on.  Been there and done that already and wasn’t in the mood to be without a lot of money again.  I kept some money and so did Tymer so that we could buy our food and drinks and tickets for the rides  – yeah, it’s all about having fun, which we did.

I better explain about Tymer, she’s a cousin that has shown up in Orgrimmar without much of a big hurrah other than the fact that survived all of the stuff before she got there.  She was really surprised to see most of the Pratfalls were already there and well established too, so, naturally, she jumped on board with Morningstar Enterprises.  It’s been fun running around with her because she isn’t a stick in the mud like my sister has turned out to be.

I wasn’t real happy when we were all living in Silvermoon, too many elves, and there wasn’t much I could do for entertainment in the area because I don’t think they really like goblins if the truth were to be known.  Of course the next big city was the Undercity which really wasn’t my cup of tea either because the place always smells bad and it’s full of Forsaken – not what I’d call a real lively bunch no matter how you try to spin-doctor that.  Well, once we got the go ahead from the Boss that we could set up shop in Orgrimmar again, I can’t explain to you how happy I was with that idea.  Whew!  We were going back to a place that I knew and there were many of my old friends that stayed in the city even with all of the Orcs acting weird.

I know that we probably caused quite the hubbub when we left Silvermoon because I don’t think that the dust has settled yet.  Didn’t take us long to make the move back to the old warehouse and get the shop up and running again.  I was really kind of happy when we got that done and tried to settle in with my usual care.  No, Zippie has been running around like someone built a fire under her butt and has the temper to match it these days – I do wish the Boss would come back for a surprise visit to see all of the stuff going on.   I’m sure Zippie will settle down eventually, however, she is making everyone crazy right now.

I don’t think it was a bad idea for Tymer and I to take in the Faire, it’s not like we hadn’t done it before, I guess it just didn’t sit well with Miss “Thinksshesthebossofeverything” and she is just ranting about it to hear the sound of her own voice.  It didn’t cost her any money and it didn’t cost the company any money, so, I don’t know what her problem is other than the fact that we didn’t invite her to come along with us.

Man, we had a blast, literally.  I don’t know how many times I went on the canon ride, especially after we started doing shots  after each attempt.    The deal was that if you didn’t hit the bull’s-eye straight on, you had to take a shot and take another ride.  Well, I think I hit the bull’s-eye a few times and still did the shot so that Tymer didn’t feel bad.   We shouldn’t have done the canon ride before we did that flying through the rings thing.  Oh, my head is still spinning from trying to make the rounds on that one – I’d see what I thought I was ring and fly through only to see that it wasn’t really there and I needed to fly through the one that was still there – yeah, I was seeing double a bit.   Oh, then the racing – my butt still hurts  from falling off my mount because I’d get distracted by things – well, those little zeps hurt when the shoot you in the bum.   I’ll admit that Tymer did a lot better on the rides than I did and her wagering was pretty much spot on, I had to borrow some money from her so I could get something to eat and drink there at the last.

Naturally, we stayed way too late and rather than heading back to Orgrimmar, we spent the night in Thunder Bluff.  I think that is where the problem was – we should have gone back to Orgrimmar with the money and goods from the contracts, however, we didn’t know there was a deadline on the stuff that was so close that it would matter.   Tymer and I neither thought much about it because we were both too drunk to think that we needed to let Zippie know where we were either – it’s not like we’re rookies when we do our jobs and can work circles around these mooks.

We got on the Zep back to Orgrimmar this morning and made it back in plenty of time, we thought, until we saw Zippie pacing at the front of the warehouse.   Instead of the “hiyah, good to see ya” that we were expecting, we got the message that we were being fined for being late with materials from the contract that we took.  Well, I don’t think it was that big of a deal because  it was just a few Kodo hides and we had collected the money that we were owed.  Oh well, I’ll wait until she settles down and find what the real issue is.

I’m still happy that Tymer and I made it to the Faire, now, if only Zippie would shut up – my head is just pounding.

 

Dooddah

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Dooddah Goes To The Faire…


March 4th

Dear Journal,

I know it wasn’t very nice of me to fool my sister, Zippie, however, when she kept asking for someone to go to Orgrimmar to pick up some contracts and check on our old warehouse there, I was all but jumping for joy.  Of course, Uncle Zednick could have done the tasks because he’s already over there, however, Zippie said that she wanted someone that she could trust to get the job done – which kind of left me.

So, off I went to Orgrimmar, filled with excitement about visiting the city and not being supervised by Uncle Zednick.  I could feel free to wander around and visit with some of my old friends while I was there as well as seeing how things have changed since Garrosh left.

One of the things that stayed in the back of my mind was the fact that the Faire was in town and I could spend some time there just having fun after I got my work done.  I could ride the rides, play the games as many times as I wanted too as well as eating all of the food that I wanted to eat the last time and didn’t get the change.

Oh, what a great time I had although I will have to admit that I got kind of sick after drinking so many fizzy drinks that I felt like I was going to explode, hope I didn’t mess up the people too much when I ended up throwing up on the people below when I was flying around with those silly wings and going through the rings.  Maybe they were just Alliance people, if that was the case, I’m sorry but not nearly as sorry as I would have been if they had been Horde.  I had so much and didn’t really notice the time as closely as I should have, I suppose.

There were just so many things to see that I hadn’t had the chance to see before because the others were too busy wanting to go to other places.   I even got my fortune read although I don’t know what she meant about success with my ventures – I’m not venturing anything, I’m just doing my job.

Whoa, I don’t know what they gave that turtle at the ring toss this time because he was sure zipping around like he had rockets under his shell.  It was pretty hard to hit that post on this back.  I tried asking what they gave the turtle to speed him up and the girl there wouldn’t tell me.  I wouldn’t mind giving my crab, Salad, some stuff to speed him up sometimes. I would even share some of the stuff with Panmoshu, my Panderan friend,  to give to her turtle, Soup, to see if he wouldn’t pick up the pace a little bit.  Oh well, may I’ll find out one of these days.

Oh, they added a new race on the beach.  I don’t think I did very well with it because I got lost a couple of days and hit a few things that I shouldn’t and got shot off into the water.  I’m sure that my race time was dead last, however, that’s okay, I still had fun.  I know that I wish they had cleared out some of those big wolves that seemed to wander through the race track area sometimes and scared me half to death – at least my mount kept running and I didn’t get eaten.

It was fun and I don’t regret slipping off to go over there with a few of my buddies from Orgrimmar, however, I know that Zippie will be kind of upset that I took the extra time to have some fun instead of racing back to Silvermoon with the contracts I picked up.  Oh yeah, the warehouse looks great and it looks like the Boss made his decision already because there were some Orcs putting up a new sign over the doors that said “Morningstar Enterprises” on it.  I wonder if we will be moving back here to live, it might be a nice change for us because I will have to admit that it makes me nervous being around all of those elves all of the time.  I hope we can get our little house back or at least have a nice size area upstairs to live again since the Princess has moved on with her life – we hope she has, at least.

Well, time for me to get some sleep and start back to Silvermoon tomorrow so I can turn in this stuff and let Zippie know about the warehouse.   It was sure fun getting away on my own for a while – it’s like Zednick and Zippie don’t trust me to be able to handle things on my own because I’m the youngest – well, I can take care of myself fairly well.

Dooddah Prattfall

by

Family – What Does that Really Mean?


January 6th

Dear Journal,

You know it ain’t easy being a distant cousin to the Prattfalls and sometimes I think they want to keep it as distant as possible, you know.  I think it’s kind of hurtful that they all moved to that Silvermoon place and left me in the slums here in Orgrimmar.  I ain’t got nothing wrong with me that I know of other than being the youngest in the family and I’m not quite up to par with them socially, I guess.

I do get to see Dooddah and Zednick now and then because they seem to come to Orgrimmar with more frequency than I think that Zippie does.  Well, can’t expect her being the one to come to Org that much either considering she’s gotten kind of snooty with her job and stuff.    I was going to mention it to Dooddah the last time she was here but I thought better of it, no sense in losing a friend because she might think I was dissing her sister.  I just wish that I didn’t feel so far away from the family.  Oh yeah, sure, I have my own group of friends here in the Slums, it ain’t exactly the same as family.  I always thought that we were supposed to stick up for one another, you know, family-like.

I don’t think that I’d be in such a foul mood about it except that I didn’t really get anything from Winter’s Veil from them, no card, no invitation to come to dinner, nothing, it was like I wasn’t even here or something.  At least I got some stuff from under the tree and the socks keep my feet warm in these worn out boots that I have, even if they do get wet now and then with the holes in them.  I think it would have been nice if they had acknowledged that I even existed.

Look, I know the family wasn’t all that close back in Kezan, however, my Dad was best friends with Zednick and I would have thought that he might have at least remembered me from that.

I even put an application in for their stupid company to get a job and I still haven’t heard anything back from Zippie.  Guess they don’t need another hunter and I guess they don’t want everyone to know that they have poor relations living in Orgrimmar – it might keep them from making more money.

I know that I promised myself that I wouldn’t get in this funk about not being accepted and all that, however, it’s just not fair.  Even Dooddah took me out hunting with her and she said that I did real good.  I was going to ask her about my application and I didn’t because she may not know what her older sister is doing anymore than I would.   I get the feeling that Dooddah kind of does her own thing and the only reason that she went to Silvermoon was to be with her family.

Well, crap, some mooks are trying to start trouble here in Cross Roads, guess I better get my butt out of here before they start thinking that I look like an easy target or something.  The guards seem to be keeping most of them out of here, however, you’d think that the Alliance would try to find another place to pick on sometime.

Tymer Prattfall

 

by

Well Worth The Time…


October 29th

Dear Journal,

Well, I finally broke away from the office and went out to have some fun with the holiday.  Sure, I missed out on going with Uncle Zed and Dooddah because they were tired of waiting on me to go with them and went without me.  That’s okay because I know that I have been buried alive with the paperwork and getting all of the contracts out to the employees that could do the job.  The Boss has been busy doing whatever it is that he really does and I’ve been holding down the Fort.  No, I think that I just need to start doing other things other than working.  I know, I know, time is money, however, if you have all the gold in the world and you die, you can’t take it with you.  Might as well start enjoying life.

I did take off and go to Orgrimmar to see what I could see and start doing my Trick or Treating, fun things that you can get sometimes and the people that you can meet is all part of it.  I am a very social goblin and spending all of this time locked up with work really does tend to make me more than a little bit cranky.    I’ve actually started locating some more of our family members too, which is going to make it even nicer for the holidays when we can all get together and revel one another with our tales of how we escaped the trials, tribulations and disasters back home.    Yeah, I know, we can’t ever go back home, however, that doesn’t mean that sometimes we want to talk about things the way that they were before the volcano went off.

While I was out doing this bucket chasing, I thought I might try my hand again at this archeology thing too.  That’s a pretty lucrative sideline for gold and I haven’t been taking advantage of it like I should have.  Oh, I know I will never be as wealthy as Gallywix or anything like that.  A girl would like some new clothes and maybe a nice house to live in, you know? I know that Dooddah is always prattling on about the new gear she bought with the money she has made off some of the artifacts she’s been able to sell.   I know the little scamp sells stuff outside of the company and that’s okay, it’s her way of making money and I can’t blame her for wanting to work around the edges of the company while she is doing it.

I know that most of my friends live in Kalimdor and I have been stuck in Silvermoon City with all of those elves which can get to be real annoying sometimes.  I have yet to get out and really explore anything in the Eastern Kingdoms because I’ve been in the office.  Well, I think that I am going to start getting out more and getting away from the city as often as I can.

Oh, let’s not even talk about Shattrath.  I swear if the Draeni looks down her nose at me one more time, I’m going to punch her in the nose.  I thought Blood Elves were arrogant, however, they can’t hold a candle this Space Goat.   Yeah, sure, I even talked to the Boss about it and he told me that I was going to have to come out with some kind of working agreement with this Magdamia person.  Come on, man, she’s from the Alliance and I’m Horde, just because you like sleeping with the enemy doesn’t mean that we all kind of bend the rules that way too.   I know that this Maggie can really set me off pretty quickly because I think that she has figured out which of my buttons to push to make me mad – she speaks some Orcish although I can barely understand her.  I know I’d have to jump on a chair to punch her in the nose, however, there are times that it would be well worth the indignity of having to do that.  It’s not like I can’t hit her with a spell or something – I just think the satisfaction of smacking her one time physically would definitely be worth the extra effort.  Oh, she thinks that her people are more technologically advanced than us goblins – well, I don’t see anything that says we crashed a space ship that we built into someone else’s planet either.  So, we may blow things up accidently now and then, however, we seem to be better at things that her folks are, right?  Well, enough of that, I’m gonna change the subject because it’s making my good time into a bad one.

I will have to say that I enjoyed flying all over Kalimdor trying to get to some of the buckets because let’s be honest – those Alliance people do not like to share anything.  Sheesh!  You’d think that one piece of candy would break the bank or something.   Besides, I think our Wicker Man looks better than theirs anyway.  We got smart this year and it’s in the courtyard at UC so the Alliance really have a tough time trying to douse our guy.

I had to laugh because I kept thinking about Zednick and his affinity for going around whizzing on the fires even when there seemed to be impossible odds to keep him from doing it – he says they were hard-pressed to keep up with him and his aim was always true.  It’s gotta be a guy thing or a Zed thing, that was fun anyway – the Harvest Festival.

Well, I had better get busy because I am planning on meeting up with some of my friends in Orgrimmar and we’re going to go out and hit some more buckets.  The candy is good and sometimes we just enjoy the company and the traveling – a few good Inns too.

Zippie

 

 

by

Traveling Goblin…


September 4th

Dear Journal,

I think that Zippie and I will have a nice long discussion when I get back from this trip she sent me on with the contracts.  I don’t mind the money, that’s a real perk, what I do mind is the way that things just seem to be spread out from one end of Kalimdor to the other.  Go to this place to pick up this ore and then go to another place to pick up some more so that I can fill my engineering contracts.  Luckily for me, travel time is not a problem because I can just make my own portals to go back to wherever I choose.  I suppose I ought to be thankful that she doesn’t have me traipsing to Pandaria to chase down the Boss’s sister for something or other – we still haven’t collected all of the money that she promised to pay back  with interest that she borrowed before she went on her latest trip.

Right now I am spending a lot of my time in Orgrimmar with some of my buddies, which really shouldn’t please Zippie all that much because she knows how we all like to drink and sometimes just taunt the heck out of the mooks that are here in the city.  No, I’m not going to get drunk enough to go moon Garrosh again and get thrown into jail, that was not a pleasant experience and almost got my butt sent to a labor camp.

One of the bonuses for the trip has been me finding a girlfriend of sorts.  Her name Fizzap and she has beautiful blonde hair and is a goblin – can’t see me with any other kind actually.  Anyway, she and I have been spending a lot of company together here in the slums of Orgrimmar, partying and just enjoying things as they come along.  She has a great sense of humor and she really knows how to make money on her own – that’s my kind of woman.  Anyway, I don’t mind the female company because it has been a long time since I have had a girlfriend, well, not since we had to leave Kazan.  The only drawback that I can see that might get people upset with my relationship is the fact that she is a warlock.

Heck, I thought that Fizz was just another mage.  I mean she knows a lot of the same stuff that I do and she can throw her magic around just like I do only hers seems to linger quite a bit longer.  I couldn’t quite put my finger on the taint that seemed to surround things until I actually saw her transform when we were out in the Barrens together.   Could have knocked me over with a feather when that came to pass.  I’ll admit that it was a bit of a turn-off for a while, however, we talked about it and we’ve decided that we’re just not going to tell anyone what she is.  I mean it could get a bit dicey when I decide to take her back to Silvermoon with me.  You know, for all the magic that surrounds Silvermoon and the residual effects of the fel magic that seem to crop up now and again, those folks have little to no tolerance for warlocks.   I’ve seen some things that have happened to warlocks in Silvermoon and I can tell you that none of it has been pleasant or I wouldn’t think it was.

I know that it’s nice to have Fizz along with me too when I’m out traveling, she’s a much better cook than I am and she’s someone that I can talk with. I haven’t told Zippie a thing about me seeing a girl because I know that she and Dooddah both would make a trip to Orgrimmar just to check things out.  I know those two really complain to me about how much I drink and all that, however, I know that they get a bit jealous every now and then when they think I am not paying them enough attention.  They have been like that since they were little girls and they latched onto their Uncle Zednick.

Let’s see, I’ve seen enough of the Stonetalon area to last me for a while and I swear those Thunder Lizards just seem to be drawn to me like a magnet.  I’ve gotten zapped a few times and I will admit that it does get old after a while.  Of course the mining is pretty good there even with the spiders and the Alliance wandering around like they owned the place.  I have seen more humans in the last month and not as many Night Elves as I might have thought I’d see up there.  Okay, I’ve had a few run-ins with the humans out there and it wasn’t because I started it.  I know that they stomp around and think that they are all big, bad and awesome, however, they can’t keep up with a fast moving goblin mage.  I can deal with the Night Elves, however, I do wish the humans would go back to Stormwind and they can take the Worgen with them.

I know that I hate to get into a running battle with a Worgen because they have some speed on them and I can move as fast as I want, even try to sneak away from where they are.  If they are in their human form, which is bad enough, and then they are in their worgen form, well, let’s just say that they can smell me from a mile away.  I’m sending the company a bill for the two robes that I have ruined doing their contract work for them and they had better pay up. No, I didn’t get hurt, just got some cloth torn and a couple of scratches from not blinking away fast enough.

I’ve got some contracts to fill where I have to get the materials from Desolace, Feralas and the Southern Barrens.  I do wish the girl had gotten a bit more organized with stuff because I do want to go back to Silvermoon now and again.  I like hanging out with my buddies where we can talk shop all we want and compare inventions, however, there is just something that makes me feel a bit more comfortable when I am in Silvermoon.  Could be the house that we live in and I have a real bed to sleep in.

Zednick Prattfall

by

What…Does this mean


July 4th

Dear Journal,

Well, if this isn’t just a fine bag of fertilizer!  It almost made the fertilizer hit the wind machine in my mind, however, it’s not something that can be helped I suppose.  Seems the Boss is expecting to get called up for “duty ” in the near future and expects me to take on the responsibility of running the company while he is off doing his thing for the Regent.   Just like he did when he took off for Pandaria and just like he did before that, I guess.  I was having such a great day until he walked in and gave me that bit of news and I will admit that it put a major damper on my day.   He did tell me that I should go ahead and hire an assistant to help me with things too because the thinks that I am getting overworked.

Overworked?  That’s an understatement when I had to go to Shattrath and deal with that long-tailed arrogant Draenei that works for the Boss’s wife.  I’ve got a feeling that she likes me almost as much as I like her too.  Maybe she’s not so arrogant, she has to look down her nose at me anyway because I’m short, however, I don’t like the way she keeps shifting those hooves around when we’re standing near one another.

Well, it will mean more money and it will mean more time working my fingers to the bone to where I almost look like a Forsaken.  It will also mean that I will get less time to spend with the family or even getting out in public to socialize a bit. Now, I know that the money is a good thing, however, I kind of enjoyed being able to get out and talk to people when I took that time off.   I’ll do what I need to do to make the Boss happy, however, I think that we need to get more people – you know, managers for each of the warehouses, not just me doing all of it, it’s kind of getting to be more stressful even though we are showing a profit, I can’t do it all.

Uncle Zednick is starting to complain about the fact that he never gets to see me these days and he would like for us to start spending some more time together and Dooddah, well, she just looks at me and gets this sad look on her face.  I think that she gets lonely and I know she misses the fun times that we used to have too.

I think I’ll talk to the Boss about my idea of getting more warehouse managers and I can hire someone to help with the books.  Maybe that Adamia kid or someone else – she’s too flighty to be able to sit down at the desk and go through paperwork.   I’ll start looking around to see what I can do and whom might be interested in working in the office at a flat rate rather than being out in the field working as a contract person – maybe I can find someone that I might be able to get along with.  I wonder what happened to our cousin, the kind of weird mage person – I don’t really think she’s a mage either.  I know that she made it off Kezan and got to Orgrimmar because I saw her, then, she just disappeared.

Anyway, I guess I’ll get over my surprise and disappointment with the way that things look like they are going because it hasn’t happened yet.  I’ll just wait and see what goes on with this stuff.  The Boss said he “might”  get called up again, not that he had gotten called up.

Zippie

by

Almost Time To Go Back To Work…


May 5th

Dear Journal,

Well, I was all set to head back home when the goblins I have been traveling with all of this time suggested that we catch a quick flight and a boat to Pandaria.  I’m always open for new and exciting places and I will have to say that this place hasn’t disappointed me yet, however, I know I have to head back to Silvermoon City very soon before I lose my job. Well, I doubt that I would lose my job but I’m sure it would be a long time before I got to take any more time off.

It is a very pretty place although the bushes are taller than they were in Feralas and the tigers want to do more than chew your face off.  Everyone else seemed to be having a good time and I will admit that I can see why so many are smitten with the place too.  I know that it was a good thing that I learned how to run fast when I was on Kezan.

I know that my sister Dooddah would have been extremely happy to have made the trip up here to Pandaria because she likes to explore and she likes to hunt.  At least she could have kept the tigers off my butt for me.   Of course, Zednick would have been happy sampling all of the brews that the Pandaren make too, he kind of likes to drink too much sometimes.

Our first night in Pandaria we did stay at a huge Inn in Dawn Blossom, I’ll admit that I didn’t’ mind sharing my bed with a couple of the other girls – those beds are huge and a girl could get really lost in them.  Almost makes me wish I had one of these things in Silvermoon, however, they might have to enlarge the room a bit.   Of course, we girls had our giggle times before we fell asleep because some of the fellows we are traveling with are really kind of thick headed – they just don’t understand the word “no” sometimes.  No, we don’t want to sleep with and No, we don’t want to listen to your jokes one more time just to polite.   I know that I am getting tired of the same jokes night after night although the guys seem to think they are new and exciting.   Men, can’t live with them, can’t live without them.

I have never seen such a place in my life – it’s beautiful, dangerous, new and exciting.   Oh, fishing, Uncle Zednick would think that he had died and gone to heaven because there seems to be a lot of fish here – big fish, bigger than me.  I can imagine that we could eat for a week on one of these fish, leftovers ain’t’ bad and I don’t like to cook all of the time either.

While we were in Dawn’s Blossom, my traveling companions were all excited about going to the Valley of Four Winds.  Seems they had heard that there was a big brewery  there and the fellows really wanted to try out this new brew.  I swear, if they couldn’t walk, they’d figure out a way to crawl to get the next mug of beer.

So, nothing would do that we would travel on to Halfhill.  I already knew a little something about the settlement in the Valley of Four Winds because I pay the bills for the Boss and while the bills aren’t  unusually high, I sure wouldn’t mind making what that Jogu makes from Dawnglory’s account either.  Good Heavens!  One would think that the fellow is worth more than his weight in gold unless he’s a really big Pandaren.

When we got to the Valley of Four Winds, I was astounded at the view and the long trek that we still had to go to get to our destination, however, we took off at a good clip, got attacked by these giant rabbit looking things a few times – the little ones were worse because they traveled in packs.  I know that most people wouldn’t pay that much attention to them and would call them ankle biters, however, with my height, they were more like shoulder biters.  Ugly little things.

Little did I know that it was going to take us most of the and half the night to make it to Halfhill.  We decided to bunk at the Inn although it was real crowded and very noisy.  I will have to admit that it doesn’t matter the time of day or night, these Pandaren are drinking and having a good time.  I know they work hard too.  The real shocker in Halfhill was the size of the vegetables – turnips a big as me.  Well, I think that I am going to stay here a few days and then head back to Silvermoon.

Zippie Prattfall

 

 

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Zippie Takes Some Time Off


April 23rd

Dear Journal,

You know there are just times that you need to get away from all of the mooks and head somewhere to have some fun with your own kind.  While I like living in the big house in Silvermoon, I have to admit that it’s full of elves.  Tall elves, short elves, just elves.

Now, don’t get me wrong, I like elves and I like working for the Boss, however, there are times that a girl needs to get away from family and other people just so’s they can let their hair down and have fun.  I have been working real hard since we left Orgrimmar and now with the Shattrath thing going on, I’m ready to throw in the towel or get an assistant.  Well we all know who that assistant won’t be, right?

I finally went to the Boss yesterday and told him that I needed a break, I needed to get away before I went nuts like his sister.   I don’t think that I’ll ever go that nutso, however, I know that there are times that I just want to smack someone for no reason – you know, you get frustrated with columns of figures that just won’t add up and you can’t get this part of the ledger to balance out because you’ve been staring at it for so long.  I know that the Boss has a lot on his plate right now with things concerning his family and the business, however, a lot of that weight also rests on my shoulders – I’m the one that makes sure that he has enough money to cover all of this stuff.

I told Uncle Zednick and Dooddah that I was going away for a while and naturally, Dooddah wanted to tag along.  Uncle Zednick just kind of shrugged his shoulders and said that he was busy right now anyway with his mage thing and getting in touch with some of his engineering buddies that are supposed to be over here in Silvermoon.  I had to tell Dooddah that she can go with me next time, I just needed some time away from family and the business.  Sure, she was disappointed and I can understand that, however,  I don’t think I need my little sister following me around especially if I meet a nice goblin fella somewhere in my travels.

The Boss told me to take a road trip, which I did.  He told me that Desolace was different – hated it.  He also told me that Feralas was a beautiful place.   Well, yeah, it’s beautiful if you’re not vertically challenged and all of the bushes and grass happens to be taller than you are.   I enjoyed the peace and quiet when the bears weren’t trying to eat me or some whelpling wasn’t trying to eat my face – yep, that was sure enjoyable.   At least the Tauren had some nice camps there and I got to learn a few new recipes for cooking that I might try out sometime.

It must be that time of year for people to take trips too.  I ran into some other goblins that were taking a break from Orgrimmar and all of those Orcs.  I know that we were sitting around and talking about all kinds of stuff.  Of course, they wanted to know about Silvermoon and I told them about what little bit I knew or had seen since I got there and they kind of frowned a bit – guess the place really doesn’t sound all that fun when you’re a goblin.  Come to think of it, I haven’t had time to have any fun since I got there.

They started talking about this place called Thousand Needles and how there used to be a race track there that had gotten covered over by  the flood when Deathwing came blasting through Kalimdor.  Well, there seems to be a goblin salvage operation going on down there from this big barge-they are salvaging parts from the race cars that were still down there when the flood happened and I guess a bunch of other stuff from the buildings that are underwater .  Seems this barge is run by goblins and the tall people aren’t all over the place either.  Sounded good to me.   It also sounds like a place where a goblin could make some good money too, I’m always interested in making money on the side.

Well, we all grouped together and made our way to the barge and that’s where I am right now.  Kind of got into a bar fight when we arrived.  You know those gnomes throw one heck of a punch when you hit them in the head with a bottle of grog.  I’m kind of sitting here with a bit of shiner, first one I’ve had since I left Kezan, and a headache that would make an Orc cry, I think.

This must be party central or something.  I know that I think I’ll take today off and maybe do some fishing while this headache finds its way to leave.  I think that I saw some of my friends from Orgrimmar working here too, might look them up and see how things are going.  You know, you kind of lose touch with people when you leave a city as fast as we did.

Zippie Prattfall

 

 

 

by

Walking Headache


March 28th

Dear Journal,

I sure hope the Boss knows what in the heck he is doing with his sister!! Well, I’ll admit that the house is a lot more peaceful since she has been “removed from the premises” as he puts it, however, it sure has made my life interesting at the office.  Of course, she can’t just waltz in there and demand all kinds of things like she once was, however, we’re all sick of hearing about what a dump her brother moved her into.

Man, we’d like something like that – you know, Zednick and Dooddah – they would be able to have a place to call their own and a house in Silvermoon is quite a feather in the cap as far as I am concerned.  She was raging about not having running water all over the place and a steady supply of hot water – well, she should try living in the slums in Orgrimmar.  We got hot water a lot there, even if it wasn’t all that great considering where it came from.  She even got servants thrown in too, that was something that surprised me a bit, although, I can see that they were put there to keep an eye on her Highness too.

At least we can walk around the house now and not have to worry about stepping on her toes for something that we might have done or not done.  Life is kind of pleasant and the Boss seems more like himself because he doesn’t have to worry about her raging at him all of the time.

She may camp out here at the warehouse to try to catch him and I wish her luck there because he doesn’t come down here that often to start with.  Oh yeah, I can see that she would think that he is avoiding her, wish she’d get the idea that there are a lot of other people avoiding her, not just her brother.

I know that I was about to go downstairs and tell her to calm down some because she was ranting at no one that cared when one of the new guys just told her to shut up.  Oh, you would have thought that he had committed some kind of sin by telling her that.  She went off like a rocket and started screaming at the guy – well, that would have been okay, however, the fellow didn’t know who she was and proceeded to punch her in the mouth.  I think that shocked her and she told the fellow, after she picked her butt up off the ground that she’d make sure he got fired and he told her that he didn’t care, he was a contract worker just like she was.  He gets paid by the contract, just like she does, however, he could freelance if there weren’t any contracts for him.

I did finally go down to explain to the guy after she stormed out of the warehouse and explained who she was and that he didn’t have a thing to worry about in so far as working for Morningstar Enterprises as long as he kept his end of the bargain by filling the contracts that he had been given.  Which, I have to remind Faendra that she has some outstanding and over-due contracts that her brother is not going to pay a penalty on just because she was too busy whining about her living conditions to fill them.  I mean, they aren’t even that hard to fill – just leave Silvermoon and shoot a few animals and skin them.

There are times that I wish that the Boss had never found her at the Faire and brought her back home.  I know that he was hoping that she had changed and is really upset that she has only gotten worse.  One would have thought that she might have learned a few things while she was traipsing around Kalimdor with Light only knows what kind of people.   I’m surprised that someone out there didn’t just kill her off or something.  I do know that nobody cared who she was or who her family was out there and it would have been just another girl gone missing.

I was laughing at Uncle Zednick the other night because he is still wishing that he had done more than sheep her when she made him mad.  The man will never change and I know that he means well with some of the thing that he does, however, I think that he needs to get busy with his engineering friends and come up with some gimmicks for us to sell for our “family fund” because I know that I don’t plan on working my whole life away.

I hope the Princess decides to go camp at the house to try to catch her brother tomorrow because she gave me a headache today that all of the herbs in the city won’t touch.

Zippie

by

Hunter IN Charge…errr…umm…NO


March 4th

Dear Journal,

I don’t usually get a chance to say much in my journal these days, however, I think I will just plunk my butt down here and relax for a while.  Zippie and Zednick decided to take a quick trip to Shattrath City to check out the new warehouse and living facilities and they left me in charge of things here in Silvermoon.  I sure hope they don’t stay away too long, I don’t like this authority thing at all, I would much rather be just accountable for myself and Kitteh.

Oh hello there, I’m a hunter, I don’t have a head for figures and I sure don’t know all of the employees that come through the doors of the warehouse – I’m usually out in the field doing my job and I usually travel alone.  I’m not sure what they were thinking when they told me to take care of things here in town.

Sure, I haven’t really minded the offices being in Silvermoon all that much with the exception that I don’t get to see my friends in Orgrimmar very often anymore.  There’s nothing like sitting there in a sunchair, sipping a nice cold one, chatting with your friends and fishing. The fish aren’t bad if you clean them real good and cook them until they are crispy. Sure the gossip is always good and sometimes someone has something to say about the absence of Gallywix trying to lord it over all of us.  We all kind of wonder what has happened to him lately – I’m thinking he’s off plotting about how he can grab more money from the goblins and these stupid mooks.

I sure wish that they had taken the Boss’s dingbat sister with them though.  She’s mean to me when there aren’t other people around.  Oh yeah, now I have to call her Miss Faendra.  There are a few other things I’d like to call her, however, I’m not real good at writing swear words – I can say them much better.

I don’t think that Zed and Zippie had been gone more than an hour when Miss Faendra flounced herself into the office and demanded that I hand over the cash box and open the safe for her.  Well, she got all upset when I told her the cash box was in the safe and the safe was locked.  She yelled at me and told me to open the safe – I can’t open the safe, Zippie never gave me the combination.

Well, she proceeded to call me all manner of names, insulting my parentage, telling me that I was just a green mental midget.  That one did make me laugh because it’s true – I am green, I am short and because I’m small, my brain has gotta match, right?  I bet I have more great ideas about stuff than she ever has, she’s just a skinny Blood Elf and a lousy hunter. I didn’t tell her about her being a lousy hunter though – which is true, I’ve been out in the field with her once or twice and she’s always worried about breaking a nail or something.  I work with my own rules out there – you kill, you clean it and you skin it – nope, I refused to do her job for her, plain and simple.  Oh, did I mention that she is a skinny Blood Elf that is lazy too?

She stormed out of the office and headed down into the warehouse to raise trouble with the hired help down there.  Apparently, that didn’t work out that well for her when she tried telling one of the Tauren what to do because the fellow started acting as dumb as an Orc peon, so, she got up closer to him to yell some more and he promptly sat on her.  I heard the muffle screams and the laughter up here in the office and had to go down and put a stop to it before the fellow killed the Boss’s sister.  I couldn’t help it, I was laughing so hard that I had tears streaming down my face.  Let’s just say that she blew outta the warehouse like someone had thrown a bomb at her – now, there’s a thought.

I know it wasn’t nice, however, she’s not nice at all, we all kind of stood there and laughed because the look on her face was classic.  Let’s just say that that fancy hairdo of hers was tangled up  – I did tell the Tauren that he didn’t need to add insult to injury by farting on her while he was sitting on her – we all laughed some more about that.

Hey, we don’t have to treat her any differently than we do each other.  She’s just one of “us” now and nothing special.  If she is going to try to terrorize the help, we can terrorize right back.  I just hope that her brother doesn’t put her “in charge” of anything or we’re all gonna be in some serious trouble.

I know that she is going to be in for one heck of a surprise when she takes her armor out of her locker and takes off to hunt.  Most of us wear our armor all of the time and we take care of cleaning it ourselves.  No, she wasn’t going to clean her armor, one of us was supposed to do it.  Okay, that’s all well and good, however, it kind of fell to the bottom of the list of things to do.

I know that I was a little surprised when one of little Pandaren took the gear out of the locker and started cleaning it – it sure was shiny and you’d could see yourself in it, it was that shiny.  I could never get my armor to look like that and asked him what he did – you know some kind special Pandaren magic trick?  I almost fell off my feet when he told me what he had used to give that armor that shine – boar fat – he rubbed boar fat all over the armor and wiped it off so it didn’t feel greasy.   Oh boy, she is going to attract anything on four feet that is looking for an easy meal.  I know I was cracking up with that idea and just decided that it would be one of those pranks that I would keep to myself.  Well, if she gets eaten by a bear, it’s not my fault.

I wonder if Miss Faendra gets the idea that the rest of us don’t really like her all that much?

Well, Zippie and Zednick got back home and I’m happy that I don’t have to walk around acting like the boss anymore.  That was hard work and I would much rather have been out hunting.  Yep, I was the “Hunter In Charge” and can’t say that I liked it much.  I hope they don’t make a habit of that too often because I’ll be forced to stay busy elsewhere if they do.   Make one of the Tauren or even a Forsaken with a head for figures do it – yeah, that’s the ticket, a Forsaken that has all of their fingers and toes so they can count.

Dooddah