Never Giving Up…

April 30th

Dear Journal,

I have just about decided that it’s time for me to start thinking about packing up and heading to Silvermoon to see if I can figure out a way to get that blonde headed Ranger in my bed.  Of course, I’ll have to listen to Felessa babble about her little Ranger boyfriend that looks just like my big brother.  Well, it probably wouldn’t hurt to find out whom this fellow is either – who knows, it might be a by-blow to one of Fnor’s escapades when he was younger and in Silvermoon.

I have written all kinds of letters to Dawnglory and I have yet to receive a response from him.  I am really starting to get angry with him again.  It’s just rude not to answer your mail.  I don’t care if there is a war going on and you’re busy – you really should answer your mail if someone has taken the trouble to write you a letter, you should respond.

Fnor keeps telling me that Dawnglory isn’t the marrying kind, however, if I have a baby – he will have to marry me, right?  I haven’t discussed my plans with my big brother yet because I don’t think that he would approve, however, after I’m married to his best friend, he’ll have to approve of the match. 

I know that Fnor has been trying to make a match for me with one of those little fops in Silvermoon because I have gotten a couple of letters here in Orgrimmar from Lord whatever-his-name-is and a couple of invitations to events from other families that are in the hierarchy.  One would think that my brother of all people would understand that I don’t care about bloodlines and family names, I just want the man that I love.

I’ve already got the potions that I wanted to get from some of the women here in Orgrimmar and they told me how I would have to make sure that Dawnglory drinks the whole glass of wine and one lady gave me a potion to take the day before to make sure that I was especially fertile to get the baby started.

I even got desperate enough to go to a healer and talk to them about making a baby and she examined me. She laughed and told me that I was the first virgin at my age that she had seen in years.  Well, that’s because I am saving that for one man – and I also asked how badly it was going to hurt when he did take that away the first time. I was assured that it would be uncomfortable at first, however, if my lover was experienced enough, he’d know how to make me feel better right away.

Well, it’s no secret that Dawnglory is very experienced with women, that’s why I am having such a terrible time trying to get him in bed with me.  I know I’m not ugly and I think that if things had been just a little bit different at Winter Veil, it would have happened then.  We just had too many people visiting at the house for us to be alone long enough for me to get his attention aroused. I know that his kisses were very arousing for me at least and I wanted more.  We were constantly interrupted by his sister, Felessa, or one of my nephews.

I bet Felessa has already been to bed with that Ranger of hers.  I know that if she has, her brother will be furious because he’s been working on getting her married, just like my brother.  What is it with these men, they treat us like chattel to be sold off to the highest bidder? Oh, there’s an idea, I could write Dawnglory and tell him that she’s seeing this guy and that she might be pregnant – that would get him to Silvermoon real fast.  I’ll have to think on that a bit because it would probably cost me my friendship with Felessa too.

The last time that Fnor was here in Orgrimmar, we did get into an argument about his plans for me because I told him that I would tell everyone in Silvermoon that he was secretly married to a Kaldorei.  Oh, I don’t think that I have seen him ever get that angry before but it was well worth it to me.

 I told him that he got married because he loved the woman, not because it was “right thing” to do. I should be given that right too.  He told me to go ahead and tell people and he would cut me off without a cent to my name and I’d probably end up being a streetwalker or something.  Well, that really made me angry and I called him a few choice names.  He actually raised his hand like he was going to strike me and I dared him too – he walked out of the apartment and slammed the door and I didn’t see him again because he went back to Pandaria to be with that woman of his.  I don’t care if I hurt his feelings, he’ll get over it like he always does.

I like Amyn, I think that she is probably very nice for a Kaldorei woman and I know that she has given my brother two sons, however, that sure isn’t going to carry on the Morningstar bloodline in an acceptable fashion, is it?  Why should I become a broodmare for some man in Silvermoon that probably won’t even know how to treat me after I give him an heir. It’s just not fair.

I’ve already picked out the man that I want.  I’ve wanted him since I was old enough to know what it meant to be with a man.  I want that to happen with this man and I will make it happen.  When I was still in school in Silvermoon, the girls would always talk about the wild blonde Ranger that came to visit with my brother and how much they would like to do things with him.  I know that I would laugh and tell them that I had known him since I was a very little girl.  They would look at me like I had grown horns out of my head. Of course, we were all very young and quite a few of them made friends with me to try to get my big brother’s attention.  I suppose he’s good looking in that dark sort of way – all that black hair.

If I don’t get an answer back from Dawnglory with this last letter, I think that I will try to figure out a way to get to Pandaria.  I suppose I could think of a way to go up there with some of the shipments we send, that way I won’t become part of the military up there.  I just want to go and see my man. He is my man, even if he doesn’t know it yet.




This Could Get Complicated…

*Language and some inferred adult content  – please don’t read it if you’re easily offended.*


April 29th

Yo Book!

Fuck Me! I know that you could have knocked me over with a freaking feather when I stepped down off my mount and turned around to see Romy standing there in Krasarang.  I probably looked like fucking fool as I stood there with my mouth hanging open and total shock registering on my face.  Well, what the fuck!  The last time we had been together and talked, she was living in Northrend with her people and that was where I had planned on spending more time with her.

Here I had been busting my hump trying to get everything caught up to where I could at least take four or five days away from Pandaria and my duties and there stood the reason for me doing that – it was the last place that I ever expected to see her, here in my own fucking backyard, so to speak.

I know that every time that I have seen her, her beauty has always astounded me.  Those long red locks of hers were in a tight braid this time which only made those dark green eyes of hers even more noticeable, the way that her smile brightened up her whole countenance was truly amazing.  To say that we were happy to see one another again is a total understatement. I know that it was all that I could do not to just wrap my arms around her and haul her ass off to have my way with her, right then and there.

I know that walk across the camp to the command tent seemed to take forever and I know there were more than just a few stares at Dawnglory and this glorious redhead walking through the camp.  Romy is part of a group of reinforcements that we had requested from Orgrimmar – who would have ever thought it possible? I know that we lightly bantered back and forth as we walked, however, my mind was racing back to seeing her in Northrend the last time, that  glorious body of hers reclined amongst those furs.

 Let’s just say that I was already fired up before we even got to the command tent where I could have a little privacy with her, even if it was just for long kiss.  I knew that people were going to be curious as to why I would be taking a complete stranger into the command tent, she had just arrived here and she wasn’t one of the Senior Rangers.  Anyway, we could barely keep our fucking hands off of each other inside that tent.  I think that she knew how happy I was to see her with the way that my body was responding to her kisses.

I really need to talk to some of the men about their stealth tactics because they fucking suck. I’m in the tent with Romy, trying to talk to her and hold her at the same time and all I see are shadows against the canvas as a couple of them were trying eavesdrop on our conversation and activities inside.  Light!  If you’re going to be nosy, at least don’t be so damned obvious! I think I know who they were and I’ll fucking deal with them later.

I know that it probably wasn’t very prudent on my part but I spoke loudly enough to let them know that we were leaving the camp together so that I could show the new Ranger some of the ropes and areas that she would be scouting.

I know that it took everything I had to get to a place that I knew of where we wouldn’t be disturbed.  Luckily, no one was in the area because when we got off the mechanical mount that I had procured for our little field trip, we had already started stripping.  I know on the ride over there that Romy’s hands were already busy getting my arousal to a peak. It was all I could do to pilot the damned thing to a decent landing. I would say that I was somewhat distracted.

Few words were spoken between us when we first got inside that little house on the hill.  I know I’m still kind of smiling at myself even now when I think about how we used that table to get things going real well.  I’ve always laughed at some of the other men talking about how they had sex in various places and positions.  I think Romy and I fucking covered everything in those tales last night.  I know that we were both lost in the throes of passion and we didn’t just make love once – it was another marathon and I have the scratches on my back to prove how well it went.

As we lay in that big Pandaren bed, all snuggled up in each other’s arms, we just lay there talking.  It’s pretty damned unusual for me to do that because it’s always been “slam-bam- thank you Ma’am” and I throw my clothes on and leave.  With Romy, we lay there enjoying the afterglow and just touch and talk to each other. It’s a very pleasant and happy feeling to be able to lay there with a woman and just talk afterwards.  Is it love or lust? I sure as hell don’t know what the fuck it is but it makes me feel good not only physically but emotionally too. That’s a whole new concept for me.

Oh, we talked about how she had gone to Silvermoon to see her Father and some family estate that they were thinking about renovating. Poor woman must have stayed in one spot too long because she got served with her draft papers that I’m sure some dumbass clerk could have just as easily shipped off to Northrend. Anyway, that’s how she came to be here in Pandaria – I don’t know whether to be totally out of my mind with happiness or still wanting to punch that clerk in the face for rushing things along.

Oh, we talked again about the possibilities of having children since neither one of us is taking any kind precautions in that area. I don’t mind having fucking children, however, Romy and I both don’t want any strings attached.  Marriage is the last thing on my mind and if she can’t keep me with her any other way, it wasn’t meant to be.

I have no idea what kind of parent I would be to start with, I could be lousy.  Couldn’t be any worse than raising a kitten to a fully grown cat, I suppose.  If she happens to get pregnant here in Pandaria, arrangements will have to be made for her to be furloughed until after the baby is born because we are Rangers first and foremost. Oh well, each time we do it, it’s a gamble that adds some additional excitement to it.  We’ll just have to wait and see what the Fates have in store for us.

We also discussed the fact that we are going to have to be extremely discreet in regard to our relationship because she is a junior officer.  Let’s just say that it is kind of frowned upon by the higher ups for an officer to be banging one of his subordinates.

I had to laugh at the idea of me busting my ass to get the time off to go see her in Northrend.  Guess that idea is shot to hell and I can cancel that leave.  Maybe we can take some time off together when she has accrued some leave time – there are so many places that I want to show her.  This is a big beautiful land and it’s too fucking bad that the only reason we are here is because of a war going on.

Well, time for me to get my ass back to camp this morning for the briefings and to get the patrols out.  I’m just fucking happy that Fnor wasn’t in camp last night when I saw Romy for the first time. He would have probably busted a gut laughing like he did when I blew up the outhouse. I bet the bastard knew she was here and just didn’t tell.  Well, Morningstar, it’s time for another payback, I’ll have to think of something to pull on him.

Maybe I could hire a Pandaren to go to his house and act like he had sent for her – you know that furry love is something that the guys talk about a lot. I’m still afraid of the damned women, those thighs just make me think about getting my back broken or my whole body getting crushed.   That’s a thought, have the furry show up there if I know that Amyn is hiding in the house – man, there would be some major hair pulling going on then.

Fnar Dawnglory

Owner of Plantation

Halfhill, Pandaria





What A Difference A Day Makes…

The soft fog was lifting from the valley floor as the young couple lay in their bed, the covers pulled up to their chins as if they were more than cold.  Kae stirred slightly as the chill air touched her face and gazed longingly at the young man lying beside her. He always liked to sprawl over the bed, one leg pinning hers as well as one arm wrapped around her holding her close to his chest. All she could do was to try to slip from the grasp of the man lying there with her without waking him.

Kal had returned to the farm late in the afternoon the day previously and to all that knew him, they would be able to tell that he was suffering from exhaustion as well as some form of depression.  Gone was the prideful bounce in his step and gone was the way that he held his head high in the air as he gazed around the farm. This was a man that was at the point of physical exhaustion and emotional collapse.

Kae rushed down the steps of the farmhouse to take him in her arms and welcome him home. The argument that they had had prior to his going back to the camp to serve his punishment duties was all but forgotten with her relief of seeing him again at the farm.  At first, Kal didn’t respond and when he did, she was taken aback by the ardor with which he kissed her. This wasn’t  the warm friendly kisses that a man would give a close friend, these were the kisses that a lover might give another.  As they stood there in the front yard of the farm, a decision had been made – their relationship would take a higher step than it ever had before.

As they held hands entering the house, Kal gave Kae a long searching look as if he wanted to talk to her about what had happened in the camp.  There was really no need, she already knew the details.  If not anything else that the Sentinels did, the women loved to gossip and the news that her man had been pressed into the more intimate side of his service, the news had traveled swiftly.  Of course, Kal had been lucky, he had been chosen by the strange girl from Dolonaar that never wanted the men to do anything with her, just touch her intimately with their hands and to talk to them.  She knew that Kal was probably confused as all the other men were with this particular woman, however, it was part of their duty. Kae was just happy that it hadn’t been that bitch of a female, Phaendra, that had drawn his number for service, which gave Kae some pleasure in the knowledge that the woman was probably furious that she hadn’t gotten the first try-out of the over-sized Sindorei as she always bragged about her intentions.

She knew that Kal had always taken stubborn pride in the fact that he would refuse to go along with this activity that the other men just took as a matter of course.  Kal hadn’t been raised like the other Kaldorei males, he had been raised by his Sentinel Mother and his Ranger Father.  The prideful side of him was definitely something that she did attribute to his Sindorei side.  Of course, Kal’s pride was more than likely damaged somewhat by spending an entire week digging and cleaning latrine pits – that would have been demoralizing to anyone with his upbringing. Punishment or not, she knew how cruel some of the women could be in the camp as well as some of the men.

As Kae slowly extracted her body from the grasp of her lover and slid neatly from the bed without waking him, the cold air hit her nude body which caused to gasp sharply and shivered as she grabbed for the nearest robe hanging over the screen that was beside the bed. She padded on her bare feet into the kitchen to prepare herself some hot tea and was being as quiet as she could as she prepared her drink.  However, she couldn’t help but grin to herself and almost purred with happiness as  to what had finally transpired between the two of them.  Oh, it hadn’t been the very special moment that she knew that Kal had wanted to happen for them the first time, however, it was a man needing a woman desperately and his passions were almost more than she could handle.  She rubbed her hand over the love-bites that were on her neck and her breasts and almost winced at the arousal that it brought back to her. 

Yes, they had taken each other with a great deal of passion and she knew that they were going to be feeling those little nibbles for a few days not to mention, they had used muscles that they hadn’t used in quite some time. Yet, for all the passion that they were both exhibiting, she had never been with a man that was as gentle and kind as Kaldor Shadowmoon – it was definitely worth the waiting that she had done in her mind.  She finally had captured the heart of this large man.  It didn’t matter that he was a mixed breed – he made love with such passion and gentleness intermingled that it had made her head spin with the pleasure.  She had never been with a man like this before.  Sure, there had been passion in her life in the past, however, nothing in comparison as to what she had experienced the night before.

She quietly gathered her ink and pen from their little cubby hole and pulled her journal from its place on the shelf that was “hers” as Kal put it.  She always chuckled that the book was always as she had left it before, the little things that she did before she left the book there were always in place, which told her that Kal had never touched her journal, hence, that meant that he had never read it.   It almost made her feel ashamed that she sometimes would read a page or two of his…she needed to stop that, however, her curiosity sometimes got the better of her. She turned and went to the table, gazing at the sleeping man in bed and just smiled softly as she started to write.


April 28th

Dear Journal,

Oh, Elune!  It finally happened after all of these months of waiting and wanting it.  I know that I was really taken by surprise considering the argument that we had had before Kal had to go back to camp and serve out his “punishment” for taking that extra time off without permission.  He’s just lucky that he wasn’t killed outright, since he is always suspect with his heritage. 

I can only say that I have never been with a man that was so gentle and kind when they were making love.  He had his fierceness showing from time to time, however, he had the most gentle touch of anyone I have been with.  Maybe it’s the difference between the Kaldorei and Sindorei or maybe it was how he was taught by the women that he has been with before me. I am still sitting here remembering all of the things that surprised me and I am a very happy woman.

When he first got back to the farm yesterday afternoon, it almost broke my heart.  He was so exhausted and I had already heard about the involvement with the other woman, although that didn’t bother me because we all know how weird she is.  I knew there wouldn’t have been anything “real” in their physical activity if there was one.  I just know that Kal looked rather broken in his spirit when he got home – the way he didn’t hold his head high, the way that he wouldn’t really look me in the eyes like he always has had the confidence to do before. Pride!! Male pride is a very important thing for a man to have and when that is taken away, they feel that their worth is less.  Silly men.

I know that I raced into his arms like a giddy schoolgirl or some desperate woman seeking the arms of her man, however, I was not even remotely prepared for the response that I got.  I thought that he would still be angry about the fight that we had had before he went back to the camp.  With the way that he kissed me back, there was no anger there, there was just pent up passion and other feelings that he had never shown to me before. It didn’t matter to me that he still smelled bad from the work he had been doing at the camp, he was in such a hurry to get home.

We just let our emotions get the better of us.  It didn’t matter to either one of us that he didn’t smell the best in the world because our own passion just pushed all of that aside.  It will be one thing that I can tease him about at a later time.  How our first time together was so romantic, the way he smelled slightly of the pits that he had been digging and the way that he just smelled very musty as a man does when they have been sweating profusely.  Stinky Lover – I think that’s what I’ll tease him with.  I know I will make him smile that smile of his.

I know that I almost feel like dancing and singing right now.  I want to shout it to the rooftops that I have slept with the man I love, however, that wouldn’t be prudent considering they already think that we have been sleeping together.  It was all a lie until last night.

I know that it was just a one night thing, however, I have a feeling that it will be different now between us.  He may not realize it, he has cared about me as a person for a very long time and has finally started caring about me as a woman.  It will change some of the things in our friendship, I’m sure…I hope it doesn’t change too much.  I still want the old Kal, my best friend and now, as my lover.

We will have to be very careful not to let the others see our feelings though because I know that they will try to hurt us with that.  We will still have to act like the Sentinel and her scouting partner, no matter what the others do. 

No, I don’t look at Kal like some of the women look at their male partners as being beneath them.  I know that Kal is my equal in all things and in some things, I know for  a fact that he is superior.  He can control his temper better than I can.  I have never seen him hiss or show his teeth to anyone other than an enemy, I can’t say the same thing for myself.  He laughingly told me one time that he knew when I started acting like our pets, then he knew I was a Sentinel because he had seen his Mother do the same thing.  I guess we’re more alike than I ever thought about.

No, I don’t know that this relationship will ever get to the point that we will want to be mated.  I know that I am willing to take it one day at a time at this point.  We’ve overcome so many obstacles since we’ve been together and now all we have is time to build our relationship on.  Would I want to be his mate?  Oh, Elune, it’s the one thing that I am dreaming of.

There are several mated pairs in our group of Sentinels and they seem to do quite well with things.  No, the women that are mated do not willingly share their mates and the men definitely do not stray away from their women.  That is one thing that I would like to have with Kal.

I’m always afraid that he will leave me for someone else or just leave me behind when this war is over and it makes me feel very afraid.  I’m being silly, we’ve just started this part of our relationship and I am so afraid that this happiness will be snatched away from me.






Growing Up Is Hard To Do

April 27th

Dear Journal,

If I ever see another latrine pit or smell that smell again, I think I’ll just end it all. I know that it was meant as a punishment for my leave without permission and I suppose that I should consider myself lucky that it wasn’t somewhat worse. It also didn’t help matters any that Kae and I had our first real argument either.

I’ve been stuck in the camp for the better part of the week and wasn’t “allowed” to go back to the farm during that time period as part of the punishment.  I hated having to bunk down with the other men in the camp because there were always women coming in and picking a fellow and off they would go to do their duty.  They ought to just call us camp followers or something because that is the way that we are treated when we aren’t on duty.

I know that one of the guys was picked to go with Kae on our normal scouting routine and I was expecting him to come back bragging about his latest conquest.  He came back alright, however, he was very quiet about his time out in the field with her. At least he was only out there in the field with her for two days and not the usual four days that we normally do our scouting. I do know that his reputation has been that he would go out, do his military duty and then service the Sentinel that he was working with.  Well, I don’t think there was any “servicing” done this time because he came back looking like he had been through a meat grinder – black eyes, split lip and I think his nose may have been broken.  I guess that was Kae’s way of telling him that she wasn’t interested in his advances or “services” to be rendered.

I know that I have always just refused to accommodate the Sentinels like this in the past, however, after talking with some of the men here in camp it became apparent that I was just kidding myself and that I should just do it like some animal and be done with it. Of course, one of the older fellows told me that the way that he did it was to visualize his mate in his mind and just keep that fantasy going and it made it easier. Well, for one thing, I don’t have a mate, I have Kae and I was afraid that it would be too difficult to keep that fantasy going.  Yeah, naturally, I have had some fantasies about her even though we’ve not actually done anything.  However, my fantasies about Kae were much more romantic than what these women were wanting.

Luckily for me, I only got picked once and the Sentinel just wanted to talk and do some heavy petting.  The whole thing was rather weird and it left me feeling a bit strange afterwards.  I guess this one has a history of that with the other fellows and they call her The Talker.  I found out a lot about her in that one evening that I didn’t even want to know about.  I think she is just lonely and maybe she hasn’t ever had sex with a man, who knows?  Or, I could just be that ugly, I don’t know. All we did was talk about her life and experiences, which was pretty weird and she didn’t want to know anything about me at all.  I guess she didn’t realize that I was the half-breed in the camp.  It still left me feeling kind of cheap and used, I suppose this is how the prostitutes feel when they get their gold.

I’ve already decided that the benefits of servicing these women doesn’t make me feel that great and I am going to avoid it even more in the future than what I have in the past. It made me just feel awful, like some kind of stud being used to service a herd of like-kind animals and then being lead away from them when the task was done.  Nope, this is one man that is going to be playing very hard to get in the future, more so than I have in the past. I don’t care if it gets me in more trouble either because my self-esteem is more important to me.  I’m not like some of the other guys that laugh and chalk it up as a conquest and brag about it.

I don’t even think that I am going to mention it to Kae at all, however, I will start avoiding the camp even more.  I don’t want to be treated like some kind of male whore because it’s just not worth the effort. I know that I volunteered to join the war effort with the Sentinels because I felt like it was something that I needed to do after Theramore.

I don’t know if I was just following it because of my patriotism or just knowing that I felt like I needed to do something. Maybe it was my thought to become more acceptable to the other people, I don’t know.  Now that I look back on things, I think that I was just trying to fit in more with the Kaldorei because of my heritage and I think that some of it was to prove to my Father that I was a grown man and was rebelling against him in some way.  Maybe I was just try to prove all of that to myself and it had nothing to do with his going back to his duty to the Horde.

Theramore was a horrible thing and it was what started all of this.  Naturally, other things have happened since then – the Kirin’Tor in Dalaran lead by Jaina Proudmore was far worse in my eyes. As my Grandfather in Dolonaar always told me “Two Wrongs don’t make a Right,” which is absolutely true.  Both things were despicable and unforgiveable.  I’m shocked that with what I know of King Varian that he didn’t go on a rampage after the first incident and that he didn’t just disavow any affiliation with Lady Proudmore.

I hope that when I do get to go back to the farm that Kae and I can talk about our fight.  I know that the whole thing was just stupid and it was me defending what my family business is about.  Kae will just have to accept my explanations about the supplies in the warehouse and if she can’t, well, I don’t know what we will do. I don’t think of it as being a traitor, which makes my Mom one too and she is anything but that. We’re, the family, is a business and we’re in that business to make a profit, plain and simple. I know that she was yelling at me about turning the other cheek and giving supplies to the Horde so that they could kill more of our people.  I tried to explain to her that it was for the rebellion, for the people that were going to try to overthrow the Warchief and stop the war. I wish that I had never taken Kae to the warehouse in Stormwind after the Faire because it has caused nothing but trouble between us.

There are days that I wish that I had never left Stormwind and came to Pandaria.  I know that I truly love Pandaria, it’s like everything that I have ever heard about the “old days” and how things were when my parents met.  If it weren’t for the war, the place would be truly a paradise and maybe when all of this is over, it will be that way.  I wish the war would just stop now.

I know that I sound like a whiny little kid or something when I read back in this entry.  If this is what it means to grow-up, I wish I could stay a kid instead of being a grown man.  Life sure wasn’t as complicated when I was younger.





This Should Be Fun…

Written in very cursive script denoting the maturity and education of the author

April 26th

Dear Journal,

I will have to admit that I am sitting here in the command post tent and I am barely able to contain myself.  Oh yes, I do have a sense of humor and there are times that it takes precedence over the other more serious side of my nature, thank the Light. I know that I am sitting here just anticipating someone’s reaction when they discover that someone they didn’t anticipate arriving here in Pandaria is definitely here and definitely has been assigned to our battalion.  I think that the initial shock is going to be well worth it, however, I’m not going to be the one to do that.  I’ll just let Dawnglory find out in his own time and way – it should be well worth the wait though.

I know that when Dawnglory came back from that overnighter in Northrend, we all kind of speculated at how many women he had been with and even put down wagers on how many.  We all lost our wagers because there wasn’t a plethora of women as we suspected, it was just one woman that had our Dawnglory worn out and marked up.  I suspected that she might be one heck of a woman; however, I was not anticipating the one that I had met last night either.

Luckily he had given me quite the description of this woman that was pretty accurate – from the long red hair to her other endowments that he didn’t go into a lot of graphic detail. She was definitely everything that he had described and then some, however, the thing that gave her away was the huge white bear that she had with her. Of course, I wasn’t expecting this person to be the woman that my second-in- command was sleeping with when I got the notification that we had new reinforcements coming in.

At least they were sending us some actual veterans in this group and not just a batch of fresh green recruits that haven’t learned how to do a lot of the work that is needed here in Pandaria without worrying about if their appearance was okay. I know there are times that I am amazed that some of these people actually make it through their initial introduction to this land – at least the ones that survive the initial landing are skilled with their weapons enough to where we don’t have to send them home in body bags.  It’s a wonder that we are even getting raw recruits; it’s a miracle indeed when we happen to get some veterans that know what they are doing too.

I haven’t shown the roster to Dawnglory yet either, evil man that I am.  I want this to be the biggest surprise that he’s had in his whole life.  He’s been busting his backside trying to get everything that he has outstanding caught up so that he can take several days off to go back to Northrend to be with this woman that has been able to keep that fire of his burning for longer than a single night. After meeting her, I’m not surprised.

Oh, she’s not one of those social butterflies from Silvermoon by any close chance.  She’s got that hardness of spirit and body that only comes from actually being in the wilds and surviving by our own wits.  She’s every inch a Ranger first and foremost, almost to the point of being a full-blooded Sentinel that has taken the oath to her service.  It’s a scary thing to run into a Sindorei woman with all of the traits that I admire in my wife.  The fire and the skills to survive anything that may happen to her in her life as a soldier.

I’ll admit that the shock of his woman being in Pandaria is going to be huge. He’s always been flamboyant about the women he’s seduced, however, I think that this time it might have been a mutual seduction and she seems like she might even be an equal to him with his own sexual appetites.

One thing I am envious of is the fact that he will be able to walk around openly with this women while Amyn and I have to sneak around to be together.  Oh, it’s not that we haven’t gotten used to it over the years, however, it is definitely not something that I would recommend to the faint of heart. I still miss the times in Dalaran where Amyn and I could take a stroll in the evenings, holding hands as we walked together in the city. At least we can still do that in Shattrath when we finally get to go back there again.

I really miss Amyn a lot since she’s gone back to her Sentinel group, however, I know that she has her duties as I have mine.  Still those few nights that we’ve had recently were absolutely wonderful and I am sure that we will make more arrangements to be together too.  At least we’re here on the same continent now and I can catch glimpses of her now and again at the market in Halfhill. I know that sometimes just the nearness of her can be a torment, however, we will do whatever it takes for us to be together – we always have.

Oh well, I had better get busy here and see what else is in this stack of paper that I need to attend too.  I know that I am going to be here in camp as much as I possibly can because that first meeting between Dawnglory and his woman is going to be hilarious.

Fnor Morningstar


Thoughts About The Future

April 25th

Dear Journal,

I will have to admit that I am getting very used to waking up in Darnassus.  Just lying there in bed next to Felley is always a shock and surprise when I realize that it isn’t my wife of many years.  The feelings I have for Felley are very different from the love that I had with my wife, however, it is still a relationship that is growing and being nurtured as we get used to our new life away from Gilneas.

This morning was no different than other mornings since we’ve been together with the exception that I am getting to the point now that I have learned to accept the Curse for what it is and not keep trying to kid myself into thinking that someone is going to come up with a “cure” for it somewhere.  Oh, I’ll admit that I was one of those people that wanted to find something that would keep the wolf buried or have it driven from my body and was willing to do almost anything other than accepting it.

Since Felley and I have had our little pack together, things have changed.  I have started to enjoy my life again even if there are fleeting moments that I think about how things were in Gilneas.  I’ve finally stopped looking for my wife and my children, there is no way that they could have survived all of the horrendous things that happened. Felley is a good woman, kind hearted almost to a fault, however, when she takes on her inner beast form, there is no one more vicious out in the wild.  I know that she and I work together as a team and the pack follows.

It does seem as if we’re getting quite a few more people in our little group, however, there are a couple that concern me with the way that they will go out independently from the pack and sometimes cause trouble to come back to my doorstep.  They’re young and they hadn’t really gotten the attention that they needed from their families back in Gilneas, I suppose.  However, I don’t intend to raise them as my own children, that’s not what I am here for.  I don’t know if the two youngest males are going to be able to make the transition with the pack, they seem too headstrong and are constantly fighting with any other males they run into, with the exception of myself.  Oh, they’ve challenged and I’ve met the challenge. If we truly followed the way of the beasts, I would have driven them from the pack with their first defeat.  There can only be one Alpha male in the pack and it is my right to lead until such time that I show that I am not capable of looking out for their best interests.

We’ve been able to make quite a bit of money with our trading and with the sales that we have made to the company that we found in Stormwind, so, I hope that we will be able to leave the confines of the fair city and get on with our lives.  Oh, don’t get me wrong, I love Darnassus, the place is almost like a fairytale city with all of the architecture, however, I would be just as happy having a little house of my own somewhere away from the dreamlike city.

I was just thinking about something that Felley said the other day and we might take our little band of people and move to Stormwind.   There seems to be a much larger group of people from Gilneas there than there are here in Darnassus.  Of course, I have enjoyed the hunts that we have been able to have on the mainland, however, I know that Felley misses the social aspects of the humans.

Sonshine asked me the other day if I was going to marry Felley and I know that the idea just about floored me.  I can’t say that I have given it much thought.  It hasn’t been that long since I lost my wife and children and I think that I need time to mourn that loss. 

Besides, I’m almost afraid that Felicity might say “no” if I asked her.  She comes from a much more educated family than mine and she might think that it is beneath her to marry me.  I was a hunter and leatherworker by trade before all of this happened and she was a society lady. The idea of asking someone to marry me and them saying “no” really does put a fear in my heart that I don’t think that I have felt since I was a very young man and asked my wife to marry me.  My feelings for Felley are growing, however, I’m not sure that she feels the same way.  Yes, I’m sleeping with the woman, what man in his right mind wouldn’t if he had the opportunity? It wasn’t something that we planned on happening, it just happened.

Oh well, I need to think on that business a lot longer than just running out there and getting things started that may or may not work out.  Marriage is a pretty serious step, I’ve been down that road already and I’m not sure that I want to do that just yet, again.

I’ve checked our finances and it looks like we might be able to make that move to Stormwind in a few months.  As to how many of our pack will want to make the change with us will be up to them.  I’m sure that Sonshine and Abigail will go with us if they have the gold, if not, Felley and I should be able to loan them a few coin. I think that we will be fine visiting Stormwind more frequently and finding a place to live there will be the top priority before we do anything permanent. We may decide that Stormwind isn’t where we really want to be either.  Damn it, I wish that we could go back go Gilneas and have it be the way that it once was, however, the place is a ruin now.




Just Some Thoughts

Running a bit late in getting anything posted for the characters today after staying up late two nights running – makes the old brain pan run a bit slower than normal.  At my age, that can be rather difficult. I may not even make a post for a character today since my brain seems to have turned into mush in regard to coming up with an idea.

Haven’t posted anything OOC for a while, so, I thought that I would give it another go.

Springtime in the Rockies – In Colorado.  We are all used to the weather changing in a heartbeat; however, this weekend was quite the rollercoaster.  One day it was hotter than Hades and the next day, cloudy, snowy and cold.  No wonder so many people get colds this time of year – you never know what to wear except to layer and remove or add as needed.

Nothing new to report other than my little guild on the Horde side finally made it to Level 19 which isn’t all that bad considering that I have been doing the leveling primarily solo.  Active members come and go, it seems.  SafeHaven was actually an escape valve for me when the drama got too much to handle a year or so ago and I put all of my Hordies in there and slammed the door.  I’m not antisocial by any means; however, I will rabbit at the first sign of OOC drama being forced on a guild.

Alliance side, I have been fortunate enough to be able to maintain my own little “private” guild for a while now and I am happy at how it is moving along even if I don’t have all of the bonuses with a large guild – it’s still fun.  I have been in two guilds, three counting my own, that have been awesome and will continue to run my characters as the whim strikes me, I guess.  There’s nothing like being able to RP on an RP realm, amirite?

One thing that I will have to say is that I am enjoying the game more than ever because of the slowing down of my pace as well as being able to have that “freedom” of being able to maintain a fairly decent RL existence.  I mean, I do actually get away from my computers and look outside to make sure that the rest of humanity hasn’t disappeared from sight.  World of Warcraft does seem to be a lot more fun these days.

I do have to admit is that WoW is definitely an outlet and social gathering spot for a lot of us old timers that don’t get out much.  You’d be surprised at the number of Senior Citizens that I have run into during the last month – it’s been amazing.  Of course, we’re RPing in-game and whispering about the grandchildren at the same time.

A Nightmare Too Real

Written in very cursive script denoting the maturity and education of the author

April 23rd

Dear Journal,

After spending the better part of my day yesterday in the presence of the Warchief and in the privy meeting that was held with Council, it’s a wonder I am not suffering from a major hangover. Of course, when you get summoned to those meetings, it is a command performance and you have to attend or you get on a list for not kissing Hellscream’s backside.

I know that I would have much rather spent my time back in Pandaria doing the job that I am supposed to be doing instead of dancing this political dance and listening to the drivel and intrigue that is going on behind closed doors.  Surely, if people even had a remote idea of how the madman thinks, they would have deserted the army long ago.  This is not the Horde that I knew and respected for years, this is some sad little man wanting to prove to the world that he is as good a leader as his Father and Thrall were.  No, he will never live long enough to reach those heights and I would assume that Hellscream’s Father must be turning in his grave at what his son is doing in his name.  As for Thrall, the man has changed dramatically, I would have thought that he would have interceded in this madness and removed the fool that is leading the Horde currently.  I assume that he his spending his time with his wife and child and his philosophies and his people are far from his mind.

I think that my total dislike of Hellscream started at the very beginning of his reign as Warchief with his underhanded manner in which he murdered Cairne Bloodhoof. I know that there are many people that still believe to this day that the man was well aware of the poison that was placed upon that blade, Gorehowl.  It was despicable and a dishonorable thing that was done that day not only to the Tauren as a people, it was the beginning of the end of the Horde as we once knew it.

As a civilian at that point, I attended the burial of Cairne and have never forgotten it.  The dignity shown by Baine and the manner in which the people mourned and celebrated the death of the great man has always stayed in my mind. Baine is a very young Chief, however, he had as much training with the teachings of his Father and his strong belief in the Earth Mother that he has shown great wisdom beyond his years with his leadership of his people. I have a deep abiding respect for this young Chief and his people.  There are times that I wonder why they have been aligned with Horde as much as I question why the Blood Elves are in the same boat with them.

I think with all of the discussion that was had yesterday in the Council Meeting, the rehashing of the Blood Elf involvement with the Theramore disgrace and the second abysmal thing that happened in Dalaran just had my mind in the right place for the nightmare that I was forced to endure last night while I slept.

There is no secret about my love of Dalaran and the home that I still long for in that city.  I know that a part of me feels like it has died and there was no funeral held in its honor.  Anyway, with the discussion of Jaina Proudmore and King Varian going on at great lengths and the hints that Jaina may be doing more than just holding council with the King made me almost physically ill.  Yes, the woman is definitely in a powerful position with her people and the King seems unable to control the madwoman.  A part of me can understand that her grief over the loss of life and her city of Theramore did more than just unhinge her mind, it destroyed a city and people that may have been innocent of her accusations.  We will never know what really happened because the reports that were given after the purge were a jumbled up mess and no one gave a true concise report of the actions – it was a massacre.

I had a dream about the Purge of Dalaran that was more than a little graphic last night.  It has left me shaken this morning as I sit here and try to write in my journal before attending another meeting today here in Orgrimmar.

The dream was so vivid that I could hear the screams of the civilians as they tried to escape their Fate as well as the cries of the poor dragonhawks as they were senselessly shot down from the skies as they tried desperately to respond to their masters’ calls. So much carnage and loss of life was senseless and the people had no escape.  In my dream I saw many take the plunge from the walls of the city as well as leaping from the sewer exit – they fell to their deaths rather than to be killed by the mindless butchers that were roaming the streets of that once fair city.  I saw dragonhawks set ablaze by the fiery arrows of Kirin’Tor while their riders screamed as they burned astride their mounts. I could even smell the fire and smoke wafting under my nostrils while I slept while I must have been moaning and tossing about in my sleep.

I think that the thing that shook me the worst was, in my dream, I could see my beloved Amyn trying to lead the two youngest boys to safety away from the carnage.  The look of horror and the look of desperation in her face was almost more than I could bear.  I saw Sunstriders being shot down all around her as she ran with the children, their hands clenched tightly in hers.  I even saw her leading them down into the sewers to try to escape.  I know that in my dream I was there, calling out to her that the sewers were a deathtrap and not to go there. I saw the youngest boy go down with an arrow through his small throat and as Amyn knelt to pick up his little body a man ran her through with a sword before killing the other child with a dagger.  I know that’s where the dream got real creepy because as much as I wanted to wake up, I was forced to endure what followed.

As Amyn lay there dying with her children lying next to her, a young man strode up and spat on her, calling her a Sindorei whore before he lit her clothing on fire as she lay there.  I could hear her screams and watch her body contort with what must have been the most excruciating pain she had ever endured.  I woke up, drenched in sweat with the bed clothes almost torn completely asunder and proceeded to not only weep at the memory but to empty the contents of my stomach.

Let’s just say that I am still shaking from that dream because it seemed so real, the sights, sounds and the smells of a city under siege were almost too real.  Some of this I have experienced in my own life with the siege of Silvermoon by the Scourge so many years ago.  Yes, my mind was playing horrible tricks with my memories included to enhance the nightmare.

I know that this was all a dream because I had made arrangements for the family to leave from Dalaran long before this actually occurred.  We all went to Shattrath to setup our new lives there to escape the political unrest that had become a part of the daily life in Dalaran. I just thank the Light and Elune that I had had the foresight to get my family out of there before any of this actually happened to them.

Now, I have to get dressed in my uniform and go sit in the next Council Meeting and listen to that oaf pontificate about what his goal is for the Horde.  Damn his soul to an eternity of burning fire.  I hope that I can control my emotions better when I get to the meeting and not make the error of jumping up and giving my true opinion of the Orc.  Greed is driving him as well as his undying loyalty to his own grandiose ideals of Power.  Why can’t the other attendees see this?  I can’t be the only one that has these feelings. Light help of us all if he is able to harness the powers of the Mogu to be wielded as a new weapon against the Alliance.  The man doesn’t care about his people nor does he care about this new land of Pandaria – he only cares about himself and what he wants.

Fnor Morningstar


A Few Words About Running a Business

April 22nd

Dear Journal,

Well, it certainly does seem like these people that I work for are just being a bit too particular right now and I am starting to get very furious with it.  It’s not that I dislike my job, it’s in Stormwind and the money is good, not to mention, it gives me a chance to mingle with the people.

Okay, I may have made a mistake by giving that guy the contract that I did for the delivery of the goods to that Sindorei’s company, however, I thought that he would be the best guy for the job.  He’s experienced and he is the son of the owner of the company, after all.  He’s done work like this before he got shot in the backside with romance and adventure and went off to war in Pandaria. As far as I can tell, he did a good job this time too, however, Mommy doesn’t think that it was such a good idea. I just got a letter from her telling me that I need to contact her if I want to send her precious son out on a contract like this again.  It really did make my day start out rather rudely – I don’t like rude.

I mean the fellow is a half-breed, where else is he going to find work like this and at the price he was paid for being the guide for this group of people.  Of course, he probably wouldn’t even be in Stormwind at all if it weren’t for his Mother anyway.

Here I sit.  A perfectly lovely Draeni woman with a good head on her shoulders for managing this company for this Sentinel and her Sindorei lover and this is the thanks I get for it.  How else could she go off traipsing after that Blood Elf in Pandaria and playing house with her son?  If it weren’t for me, they’d have to shut the doors.

Now, she sends me a Pandaren hunter to start sending out with the other hunters to learn the ropes.  By the Light, he’s a bear, can’t she see that?  Not to mention all of these Worgen people sending me their goods to sell – what is this, a zoo? I’m surrounded by Dwarves that sit here and drink themselves silly, Worgen that snort and growl at the other employees, now, I’m going to have to contend with a short round  Pandaren that can’t even find his way to the front gates of the city yet without a map. Well, he’s not the first Pandaren she’s sent to the office here for contracts – Panmoshu is another one of them and I suppose that she can get this Peiling started out on the right foot.  They speak the same language even if they are weird.

All of this “Slow Down” and all that stuff, that’s not how to make a profit and I know that.  I’ve heard of taking  a slower pace but these little furries are just so overweight that they have to take it slow or they will roll away.  Yesterday they brought another one of their kind in to see the office and to see if I had anything for him to do.  Great!  You let one in and the next thing you know, you have a whole crowd of them.  This one is a monk and I guess I have to listen to his philosophy when he brings in the jewels that he was hired to find. Changwu – what kind of name is that, sounds like someone ringing a doorbell.

Not only do I have to run the whole operation, now, I have to babysit the mage kid too.  Seems he is supposed to start doing some work for us as well.  Well, he’s another half-breed kid of the owner. If I was a lesser person, I’d turn the whole group in and call it well worth it, however, I don’t think that I could find another job where I can be in charge of everything at this pay rate, I’ve looked, trust me, I’ve looked.

I manage the office, run inventories and do the accounting, that’s a lot to do and trust me, it’s not an easy task.  Now I have all of these “things” to contend with.  I am supposed to hire an assistant, according to this letter that I got this morning.  Well, I tried that but how was I supposed to know that the little pink-haired gnome was a warlock – she didn’t put that down on her application.  You know how I found out?  Well, I suppose she thought that it was okay to let her familiar run free in the warehouse and he set a pile of boxes on fire – that’s how I found out.

Maybe I should take a few days off, it’s been a good solid year since I’ve gone back to visit my family and it might be a change that will help me stop being this way.  I don’t demand much of these people other than getting their contracts in to the office, completed, the forms filled out and the numbers added up before they hand them to me.  Well, that seems easy enough, however, the dwarves seem to think that it’s funny to add extra numbers in there so that I have to go check everything that they have brought in.  Oh, that Hammon even pinched me on the butt when I was checking his inventory.

I have to check all of these things before I start handing out money.  Doesn’t anyone know how stressful that is?  Not to mention, I do have a couple of guards that like to pilfer things now and again.  I suppose that means I have to hire more security to watch the security that I have already?

Running a business isn’t easy especially when it’s not even your own business.  I think that I am starting to come unraveled.

I didn’t mean for this journal entry to be just my ranting, however, what’s a girl to do?  I can’t sit down and discuss it with the employees without them trying to take advantage of me.  Maybe that Bitterbeer person is right, I need to find a man – not him, oh Light!  He even waggled his eyebrows at me when he suggested I needed a man.

There was even a party last night that I wanted to attend, however, I opted to stay in the office and work on the accounting.  I’m working too much, I need a break, I need to talk to my Mother and Father to see if they have any suggestions.  Maybe I should change professions?  I can just hear my Mother telling me “Maggie, just be patient, these people don’t have the intelligence that you do.”




More Trouble

April 21st

Dear Journal,

Oh Elune!! I wonder if Kal even realizes how much trouble he is in right or how much trouble that I am in because of my association with him?

When he got back from his little side trip that he took for three days, we didn’t have time to talk before we were called into the Commander’s tent to discuss his absence without leave problem.  Oh, they don’t mind if we disappear now and again for a couple of days as long as we don’t have duties that were assigned to us.  No, they probably wouldn’t have noticed under normal circumstances.

He told me he was going to Iron Forge and I assumed that he was going to go drinking with those dwarves again, which is okay, they are his friends and I’m sure that he needs a break from Pandaria now and then too.  He’s young, well, I’m young too, however, I tend to want to stay at the farm when I have time off.

Well, I guess that he had forgotten that he told me that he was going to Iron Forge and told the Commander that he was in Dolonaar and that his Grandmother was thought to be on her deathbed, however, she recovered and was expected to live.  I felt like such a fool because I had told the Commander that he was in Iron Forge, which is what he had told me.  I have no idea where in the heck the thing about Dolonaar came into his mind.

Oh, the Commander was right on that with her comments.  “Oh, Kae told me you were in Iron Forge and you tell me you were in Dolonaar at the same time.  That’s a neat trick to pull off and I’m sure that Sentinel Nightshade wasn’t mistaken with her information.  However, if you know how to be in two places at one time, perhaps you could share that information with our mages, it would be a great benefit to the war effort here in Pandaria and our troop movements. Imagine being able to be in two places at once, we’d have double the manpower on the ground. Please report to the duty officer, Shadowmoon, you’re on latrine duty for the next week where we can keep an eye on you, we need more pits to be cleaned out and new ones dug.”

They wouldn’t have even known he was gone if it hadn’t of been for Phaendra sending word to the farm that we were needed for scouting duty.  Damn that woman!!  I know that she still has it in for me after that fight we had about Kal already.  Now, I almost suspect her of spying on us when we are in Halfhill, which really wouldn’t surprise me.  She still tells the women that she wants some time in the sack with that extra large Sindorei. Oh, she makes me so angry!!

I had to report back to camp for the scouting duty without Kal and was questioned as to where my partner was and I told them he was in Iron Forge to visit with some friends while we were off-duty and I hadn’t wanted to tag along. So, there you have the beginning of the lie and I was totally ignorant of the fact that I was not telling the truth because that’s what he had told me.

We’ve since talked about what was going on and I am very upset with him.  I think we’ve had our first argument and he went out and slept under the house rather than stay inside with me.  He shouldn’t be getting involved with stuff like that.  A group of people forming a rebellion and he was happily guiding them along to drop off supplies for the Horde?  No, I don’t think so. The Sentinel in me tells me that I should report back to the command post and tell them about his involvement and the woman in me tells me to keep my mouth shut.

Now, he’s going to be stuck at the camp for the next week and I’ll have to go out on patrol with that guy that just thinks about how many women he can service for extra time off.  No, I don’t want to go scouting with someone that just wants to get in my pants so he can get a day off from duty.  From what I hear, he’s not even that good.  If I want to sleep with a man, it’s going to be Kaldor Shadowmoon and that’s just how that is.

I really want to go back to the camp and scratch Phaendra’s eyes out and kick her into one of the latrine pits that Kal is going to be cleaning.  That would definitely make me feel better.

I hope that when all of this is over that he will see the error of his ways and start sleeping in the house again.  It’s embarrassing enough to think that that bitch of a woman is watching us and for her to spread the word around the camp that he’s not even sleeping with me anymore.